


Their Story

by Nini_Niji



Series: Hiki and Howl [2]
Category: Original Work
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-19
Updated: 2019-05-19
Packaged: 2019-05-25 15:35:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 71,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14980205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nini_Niji/pseuds/Nini_Niji
Summary: The backstory of Hiki and Howl. From how they met until they got married.





	1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1 - Destiny 

“Hello, I’m here to meet Ueda-san. I have an appointment.”  
A blond man in a black Audi Q7 sat waiting in front of a big iron gate. It took a moment after he had answered the intercom before the gate began to slowly open.  
“Follow the road until you reach the main building.” a deep voice told him.  
The man did as he was told, following a gravelled path for about five minutes until he arrived at a plaza stationed in front of a grand mansion. The mansion’s architecture displayed a distinguished amalgamation of traditional Japanese charm and modern flair. He parked his car, got out, and adjusted his black suit and his midnight blue tie before pushing up his glasses and walking up to the entrance door. Giving no thought to hesitation, he rang the doorbell to which a buff, bald, gorilla of a man in a black designer suit answered.  
“Follow me,” the man ordered. He entered the house, they walked through the entrance hall and followed a long hallway. They had passed several doors before they finally reached their destination. The gorilla opened the door and gestured him to walk inside.  
“Wait here,” he growled. Taciturn fella, he thought. He sat down on the black leather sofa and the gorilla left. The room was bright and big, but the interior was quite spartanic. Next to the sofa was a chair, a coffee table and a cupboard with an expensive looking vase and a framed picture on it. Through the big glass door he had a good view on the big, well kept garden. He got up to take a closer look at the picture on the cupboard, when suddenly the door opened and a young man with a ponytail, wearing a kendo uniform, entered the room.  
“Oh, there’s someone in here, I’m sorry! I wanted to take a shortcut to the dojo.” He pointed at the glass door. “Are you waiting for my father?” he asked.  
“Yes, I am. My name is Harada Howl. Nice to meet you.” Howl smiled.  
“N-Nice to meet you, I’m Ueda Hikaru. You have an interesting name,” he smiled. “My father is in a meeting I think, but I’m sure he will be done soon. Uhm... would you like to have some tea? My father's men aren't very hospitable most of the time,” he slightly rolled his eyes and shook his head.  
“But weren't you on your way to the dojo? I don't want to be a bother to you.” Howl replied.  
“Oh, it’s just me practicing by myself, no one's waiting for me, so it’s okay if I go later.” he smiled and Howl’s heart skipped a beat.  
“Well, in that case, I would love to have a cup of tea, thank you.”  
“Great! Do you like green tea?” Hiki asked eagerly.  
“I love green tea.” Howl smiled. Hikaru returned his smile and left. After a few minutes he came back, carrying a black tablet with a teapot, a cup and a small plate of cookies on it, and placed it on the coffee table.  
“Here you go, Harada-san. I made these cookies myself, I hope you’ll like them.” He said and sat down on the chair next to the sofa. Howl took one of the cookies from the plate.  
“Mmmh! Ueda-kun, they’re delicious! Hands-down the best chocolate chip cookies I’ve ever had.” Howl praised him.  
“...Harada-san, are you making fun of me?” Hiki asked sceptically .  
“Not at all! My father’s family runs a chain of sweets shops, so you can trust my verdict,” he winked. “Maybe you've heard of Harada Sweets before?”  
Hiki blushed. “Y-Yeah. Well, I’ll take the compliment then. I'm very happy you like them, thank you.” he looked down shyly. Howl’s heart was throbbing hard. He was completely bedazzled by this boy’s brisk cuteness.  
“Uhm... Ueda-kun, would you like to stay and have tea with me?” he asked.  
“S-Sure. I'll go and get another cup.” he answered eagerly and dashed out of the room. Howl chuckled. Hiki returned in the blink of an eye and this time he sat down next to Howl. He filled their cups with the green tea, took one of the cookies and nibbled on it.  
“Ueda-kun, may I ask how old you are?”  
“I’ve turned eighteen in April.”  
“Eighteen, huh. Are you attending a University?”  
“I’m going to attend-” Hiki started, but suddenly the door opened and the bald gorilla entered the room.  
“Ueda-sama wants to see you now. Follow me,” he barked. Howl didn’t want to leave now, he wanted to talk to Hikaru more! He got up and frantically rummaged around in his pocket. He pulled out a flat silver box, opened it and handed one of the cards that were inside over to Hiki.  
“Ueda-kun, I would like to meet you again. Please call me or send me an email, okay?”  
The stern expression on his face startled Hiki. Why did that man want to meet him again so badly?  
“O-Okay.” Hiki took his business card. “I will call you,” he assured Howl, who smiled at him, thanked him and left. That was weird, Hiki thought. But for some reason, he wanted to talk to him more. He took his phone from his pocket and saved Howl’s contact. He sighed and left through the veranda door to get to the dojo.

That gorilla guy brought Howl to Ueda’s office. Normally he was calm and composed, but this appointment was a big deal for him, so he was nervous. Trying to win the head of a Yakuza clan as a new client for his company wasn’t something he took lightly. He didn’t know for sure that they were yakuza, but there were many rumours going around about the Ueda family. He was quite astonished when his assistant Kinsley told him about the call from Ueda’s assistant to make the appointment. Ueda wanted Howl to set up the IT system for all their offices, and the security system for their mansion, that was a huge deal. All the hard work since he had started his company to gain a good reputation was finally paying off. And maybe other big names would follow Ueda in the future… That’s why a lot was depending on this one meeting.  
When they entered the office, Ueda was sitting at his desk. He was focused on some papers.  
“Here he is boss,” the guy said, bowed and shut the door as he left.  
“Pardon the intrusion Ueda-san. I’m Harada Howl from KSH2, we have an appointment.” Howl bowed. The big office was covered in dark wood panels and all the furniture was black, except for the deep red velvet sofa in the corner. The room had a very elegant flair.  
“Come in, take a seat.” He greeted Howl.  
Ueda had a seemingly friendly, but very intimidating aura. That's the head of a yakuza clan for you, Howl thought. He sat down on the black leather chair in front of the big, black desk, tooled with japanese style carvings.

They had a very long conversation. It was mostly related to business, but Ueda also asked many personal things about Howl. He said he wanted to know more about the owner of a company he might affiliate with. Business connections were hard to make, it had a lot to do with trust, Howl knew that. So since he didn’t really have a choice if he wanted to conclude this contract, he told him about how he started working an IT job at a big company when he was eighteen, after moving from England to Japan with his sister. And eventually, against all odds, he decided to found his own company three years ago. Ueda was very impressed by his morale. Founding a company in Tokyo at the age of 22 was courageous, and making it that successful in only three years made Ueda eager to work with Howl. They both didn’t notice how time passed, and suddenly someone knocked at the office door.  
“Excuse me Father, Mother is calling for you.” It was Hikaru. In normal clothes this time, he must’ve finished his training. Howl’s heart skipped a beat. He looked even cuter than before.  
“Tell her that I’m on my way.” Ueda replied harshly. Then he turned to Howl again and said in a gentle tone: “I’m sorry Howl-san, but I have to go. My wife isn’t feeling well lately. Unfortunately she caught a flu.”  
“Ah no, sorry for keeping you occupied for so long. I’m taking my leave now. But if I may ask; how are we going to proceed from here on?”  
“Right, send the contracts to my assistant. I will let my lawyer check them, and if she gives her go, we will set a date for the signing. I would really like to meet you again, Howl-san.” Yasuhiro smiled. He made it. He won him over. The rest was just formalities. Ueda was willing to hire them, that was the most important part.  
“Thank you, Ueda-san. And I hope your wife will get well soon.” Howl bowed.  
“My son will show you out,” he indirectly ordered Hikaru and left. Howl smiled at Hiki, who blushed instantly.  
“This way please.” he said shyly. Howl followed him.  
“Did you keep my business card?” he asked.  
“Yeah...I also saved your contact on my phone.”  
“I see...Are you really going to call me?”  
“I-I said so, didn't I?”  
Howl couldn’t see his face, because Hiki was walking in front of him, but his ears were glowing, he was probably flushing. He's just too cute, Howl thought and grinned.  
“Ueda-kun... how about we skip the call and set a date for another meeting right now?” Howl asked bluntly. Hiki stopped walking and turned around.  
“Why do you want to meet me again so badly?” he asked sceptically. Howl was right, Hiki’s face was beet red.  
“I would really like to continue our conversation, and I want to see you again in a more casual environment. Let’s go out for lunch tomorrow, what do you say? I can pick you up.”  
“No, it's okay,” Hiki answered. “you don’t have to pick me up. Just tell me when and where and I’ll be there.” He turned back around and continued guiding Howl to the front door.  
“Do you know a good Ramen place around here maybe?” Howl asked.  
“There's one near the station. It's called Ramen Jiji. They have excellent ramen.”  
“Alright, it’s set. See you there at 2 p.m. tomorrow?”  
“Okay...”  
They had reached the front door.  
“See you tomorrow, Ueda-kun.” Howl said, slightly touching his shoulder as he walked past him.  
“Y-Yeah…” Hiki’s face felt hot and his heart was beating really fast. Did I catch Mother’s flu? He wondered. He watched Howl walk over to his car, but before he got in, he smiled and waved at Hiki. He hesitantly waved back and closed the door.  
What a strange guy, he thought and smiled. I should go and take my temperature now.

On the next day Howl arrived at the ramen restaurant thirty minutes early. He went there directly from an appointment, and since it was a forty minute drive from Tokyo city to Machida, he wanted to make sure he’ll be on time. He decided to wait for Hiki inside the cozy looking, little restaurant. When he entered, he immediately spotted his date at the counter, reading a book.  
“Hi, Ueda-kun.” he greeted him as he sat down. Hiki jolted.  
“Wah, Harada-san! You startled me, hehe. You’re early,” he said as he put his book away.  
“Look who’s talking.” Howl winked.  
“I’m here often. I really like this place. It’s small and not too crowded. There are less people here than at home, so I like to spend time here. And they make excellent Miso Ramen,” he smiled.  
“I see... Well, I guess I’m gonna try the Miso Ramen, then.” Howl smiled too. They placed their order and switched to one of the tables in the back for more privacy.  
“So... why did you want to see me again, Harada-san? I really don’t get it.” Hiki suddenly asked while they were waiting for their food.  
“Hmm… I don’t really know how to explain, but the moment I saw you, I wanted to know everything about you. I wanted to talk to you for hours and eat your delicious cookies…I know I must sound like a creep…” Howl covered his face with his hand. He couldn’t believe he just said that. “Oh, by the way… I stopped at one of my family’s branches and got you this.” He handed Hiki a black box with a golden peony emblem and the writing ‘Harada Sweets” on it.  
“W-What is this?” he asked dumbfounded.  
“Open it,” Howl smiled. “I didn’t know if you like them, but I decided to give it a shot.”  
Hiki opened the shiny box and inside was a mix of colorful japanese sweets that were shaped like flowers.  
“Uwah~ Namagashi! I love these! And they’re so pretty, thank you Harada-san!” Howl could tell that Hiki was genuinely happy about this gift.  
“Hehe, I’m glad you like them. You must think I’m a complete weirdo to ask you out after a 10 minute talk. Thank you for putting up with me, and for agreeing to meet me again.” he smiled fondly. Hiki's heart skipped a beat. What is that feeling, he wondered.  
“I-It’s okay, Harada-san. I get it. I mean...I enjoy talking to you, too.” He blushed and Howl couldn’t help but smile at his cuteness.  
“To continue where we left off, you wanted to tell me about your University, right?”  
“Ah, yes. I will enroll at T-Uni in September.”  
“Oh, my sister Sophie is a T-Uni alumni. What faculty will you attend?”  
“Education, I want to become a teacher.” Hiki sparkled.  
“Is that so?”  
“Yeah, my Brother-in-law is a professor and he always talks so passionately about his job, it inspired me.”  
“I see. Well good luck and work hard, Ueda-kun.” Howl smiled. Hiki’s heart sped up again. Why did that happen every time this man smiled?  
“T-Thank you, I’ll do my best. My grades are good and I’m really looking forward to my University life.”  
“Are you going to move to Tokyo? It would probably be more convenient than to travel by train every day, right?”  
“I want to, but I wasn’t able to find a job there yet, and there are no free dorms currently. And...I'm not allowed to take the train. My father insists for us to have a driver…and a bodyguard. You probably know what he does for a living…”  
Howl nodded. So the rumours were true.  
“There are a few rival clans that pose a constant threat. It can be dangerous for us to walk around unguarded here in Machida. But when I asked him, he said I wouldn't need any of that if I lived in Tokyo, since no one really knows who I am there. At least not the people I’m going to be surrounded by. I could move around more freely..., that would be great.” Hiki explained.  
“I see... But your father would probably pay for your rent, wouldn’t he?” Howl asked bluntly.  
“Yes. But I don’t just want to rely on my father’s money. That’s why I worked hard for my scholarship, and I always had a part time job because I wanted to save up some money. But in my last job I didn’t earn much. My savings were just about enough to pay for my books and such. I was working as a caretaker for elderly people. Though it was more like volunteering, but it was so much fun that I didn’t want to quit just because of the money… Unfortunately I had to leave after all. I need a job in Tokyo, so I’ll be able to pay for my living expenses.”  
Howl was really impressed. Hiki was so young, but already so mature and independent.  
Finally their Ramen were served, so they started eating.  
“Wow, you were right Ueda-kun, it’s really delicious!” Howl munched.  
“Told ya!” Hiki replied and smiled. “So… you mentioned that you have a sister…”  
“Yes, her name is Sophie. She’s my twin and moved to Osaka after graduating and works as a dojo instructor.”  
“That sounds impressive. Sophie and Howl, huh? Aren’t that the main characters of an anime movie called ‘Howl’s moving castle?’” Hiki asked before taking another bite.  
“Yes, but it’s adapted from a book. Our mother loved it, so she decided to name us after her favorite characters,” he answered.  
“Hehe, good thing her favorite characters weren’t Calcifer and The witch of the waste.” Hiki said jokingly. Howl chuckled.  
“Oh, hold on… There’s something on your cheek…” Howl reached out, wiped the little soup smudge off of Hiki’s cheek and licked it off his thumb.  
“W-W-W-What are you doing?” Hiki asked completely flustered.  
“Sorry, it was a reflex,” Howl grinned teasingly. Hiki blushed.  
“Jeez...” his heart was beating like crazy and his face was glowing. This man…  
Howl had a blast. Hiki was too cute for words, he loved to fluster him.  
“Ueda-kun, what was that book you were reading earlier?” Howl asked to change the topic, so Hiki could cool off a little.  
“Book? Oh, it’s called Midair, Deep Sea by Usami Akihiko. It’s my favorite book! It’s one of his older works, they’re a bit sad and gloomy. His more recent publications give off a lighter feeling, but I really like this one. He’s a great author, he was the youngest person ever to win the Aomori Award! ...Reading always takes me away from reality, it’s like diving into another world, living someone else's life for a while...” Hiki babbled.  
“I see,” Howl smiled.  
“Ah, I’m sorry. Sometimes I get carried away,” he blushed.  
“It’s good to have something you’re passionate about. You shouldn’t apologize for it to anyone.” Howl encouraged him.  
“You’re probably right.” Hiki smiled and continued eating.  
They talked about everything and anything and really enjoyed their time together. There were no moments of awkward silence or anything like that at all.  
Suddenly Hiki’s phone started ringing.  
“Oh, excuse me.” He answered the call. “Yes? ...Oh, okay. Yeah sure, no problem. I’ll come home right away…...mh...” He hung up with a sad look on his face.  
“I’m sorry Harada-san, but I have to leave. That was my sister Harumi, she needs me to take care of my niece. She has a sudden appointment and it’s their Nanny’s day off.” Hiki was very sad that he had to leave, he would’ve loved to spend more time with Howl.  
“Oh… that’s too bad. I would’ve loved to spend more time with you,” Howl said and Hiki’s heart skipped a beat. Was he reading Hiki’s mind? He got up and wanted to take out his wallet to pay for his meal.  
“No, that’s on me.” Howl stopped him.  
“B-But…”  
“Please let me invite you as a compensation for the tea and your delicious cookies yesterday.” he smiled.  
“O-Okay. Thank you very much.” Hiki blushed again.  
“How about I drive you home?” Howl offered, in the hope that he could spend a little more time with Hiki.  
“That’s very kind of you, Harada-san, thank you. But my driver is waiting outside.” Hiki grabbed his bag.  
“Oh right, I already forgot. Thank you for taking the time to meet me, Ueda-kun.” Howl didn’t want him to go, but he couldn’t just tie him down... although that thought crossed his mind for a second.  
“Thank you too, Harada-san. I really enjoyed talking to you.” Hiki smiled, but his heart felt heavy. He didn’t want to leave, but it couldn't be helped. He walked out of the shop and a big, black car was already waiting for him. Hiki was frustrated at that sight. If his father wasn’t that strict, Howl could’ve dropped him off and they could’ve spent a little more time together.  
  
While he was on his way home, Hiki thought about Howl and their conversation. His face had that earnest expression, but when he smiled, he looked so kind and…cute. He also smelled really nice, he had big hands, and his voice was so deep and had that interesting sound… Hiki shook his head to clear his thoughts. He was so confused about those feelings. Why did he feel so drawn to this stranger? He had never experienced anything like that before. Almost unconsciously, he took his phone and started writing an sms:  
“Thank you for today. I really enjoyed our time together, Harada-san. I hope we can repeat it one day. (●'◡'●)ﾉ ” was what he wrote. He tapped the send button, his heart was racing. What the heck am I thinking??  
Suddenly Hiki’s phone buzzed and made him jolt. Was that him? That was fast!  
“Ueda-kun, I want to see you again soon if that's okay. There’s a festival this weekend, would you like to go?”  
Hiki was surprised but very happy about his sudden invitation.  
“I would love to go! I have never been to a festival before. (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧”  
“Great! How about 7pm? Can I pick you up at home?”  
“Let’s meet at Machida station.” Hiki didn’t want a bodyguard to tail them this time. He wanted to sneak out, so the train station would be more convenient, he thought.  
“Alright. Saturday at 7 p.m. at Machida station. Can’t wait to see you.”  
Hiki pressed his phone against his chest and blushed hard.  
“Ugh, why am I so happy…?” he whispered. “Please let it be Saturday fast.”

Chapter 1 - END

 

 


	2. Fireworks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Howl is taking Hiki to a festival on their first date. Hiki's heart is going badump over Howl, but des Howl feel the same?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I used the japanese names for the food they're eating, because I like that better.  
> Here's what they mean:
> 
> Kakigori: shaved ice with syrup  
> Takoyaki: Waffle balls filled with octopus  
> Karaage: fried chicken on a stick  
> Yakitori: grilled chicken on a stick  
> Yakisoba: A noodle dish  
> Shateki booth: shooting game

-Their first date-

 

Throughout the whole week Hiki was extremely excited and restless because of Harada-san’s invitation to the festival. He wasn’t quite sure why he felt that way since he had only just met him, but he enjoyed being together with him a lot. Hiki had never felt anything like this before and Harada-san was practically a stranger. Still, there was something about him that made Hiki feel attracted and drawn to him from the very first moment they’d met. He was a little overwhelmed by all those feelings, so he asked his childhood friend Kaito to come over on Friday. He also asked his younger brother Hajime to come to his room. They were only one year apart, and they’ve always been very close. He really needed to talk to them about what was going on, and hopefully he’d get some good advice.  
  
“Okay Hiki, what’s going on? You were quite cryptic on the phone.” Kaito said as their little ‘council’ started.  
“Yeah Nii-chan, what’s the matter? You were acting weird this week and you’ve been even more quiet than usual. What’s going on?” Hajime asked.  
The two boys had made themselves comfortable on Hiki’s bed, while he was sitting on a chair in front of them. He was pretty tense, sitting straight and his clenched fists rested on his thighs.  
“Well... you see…there’s this guy...he visited our father the other day and I accidentally walked into the room where he was waiting. I offered him some tea, because you know how father’s men are…” Hiki slightly rolled his eyes again. “We talked for a bit and he liked my cookies, and after the meeting with father was over I walked him to the door and he wanted to meet with me on the next day and I agreed…” Hiki babbled excited. “We went to a Ramen place and talked, I had so much fun… and… then he asked me out. We’re going to a festival tomorrow.” Hiki blushed.  
“Y...Your cookies…?” Kaito asked confused.  
“Okay, that sounds a bit weird to be honest, Nii-chan. And what’s his business with our father? He sounds shady...” Hajime said sceptically.  
“I’m not sure… But he doesn’t seem like one of those people. And...I saw father smiling at him.” Hiki added.  
“Wait, what? Is he a magician? I haven’t seen father smile in years!”  
“I know! He seems like a really great guy. He asked me so many questions and he seemed genuinely interested in my answers. He’s open minded, polite, honest and kind. He’s also pretty straight forward,” he giggled. “He also has a very nice voice... It’s deep and the way he talks makes me want to listen to him forever.” Hiki smiled dreamily. Hajime and Kaito looked at each other knowingly.  
“But...umm... I think there’s something wrong with me. When I’m around him, or talk to him on the phone, my heart starts racing, my palms get sweaty and my chest feels all tingly. Why is that? Maybe I’m getting sick… or maybe I have a heart disease or something…I’m scared that it will get worse and that I can’t meet with him...”  
“Hahaha! Oh my, Nii-chan! You have a heart disease for sure! And it will definitely get worse if you meet with him,” Hajime laughed.  
“Hiki…” Kaito started. “Seriously, how hard do I have to punch you before you get that you have a crush on that guy, idiot?! Just how dense are you?”  
“Ehhh?! A crush?! Me? On him?!” Hiki was startled. He had never been interested in other people in a romantic way before. He never had a love interest or anything like that. He wasn't even sure if he liked women... or men… or both… or neither.  
“Diagnosis: lovestruck.” Hajime nodded.  
“Listen to your brother. He would know since he’s gay, right?” Kaito grinned.  
“Shut up.” Hajime punched Kaito in the face with a pillow.  
“UFF. Ouch! Hey, just stating facts here… jeez.”  
“Hmm...Do you really think I have a crush on him?” Hiki slumped back into his seat.  
“The way you talk about him, there’s no doubt.” Kaito nodded.  
“And you've only met twice?” Hajime asked.  
“Yeah. Here and at Ramen Jiji’s. But we’re texting a lot and we talked on the phone a few times.” Hiki smiled fondly.  
“Yup, you're totally into him. Gross.” Kaito said, acting disgusted.  
“I have to agree with our idiot friend, Nii-chan.”  
“See, I’m… hey!” Kaito protested.  
Hiki had to think about all that for a minute, so he let those two bicker and got absorbed in his thoughts. He had read things like that in books before. When the female protagonist fell in love with the hero, the author described similar symptoms. But then he realized something.  
“Wait a minute, wait a minute!”  
Hajime and Kaito went silent, looking at Hiki askingly.  
“Even if I really do have a crush on him, there’s no way Harada-san would return those feelings.” That sudden realization made Hiki sad.  
“That’s called unrequited love, my friend...it happens. But you never know, maybe he’s into guys…I mean why would he ask you out twice if he wouldn’t be into you?” Kaito noted.  
“That would be like winning the lottery, though. The chances are low. Very low. Speaking from experience.” Hajime sighed loudly. “He probably just wants to be friends with you...”  
“It’s fine. I'm just gonna enjoy being with him. As long as I can spend time with him, it's fine. I’m not getting my hopes up. We can be friends.” Hiki smiled disheartened.  
“Poor Nii-chan... When’s your date again?” Hajime asked.  
“I said it’s fine. We’re going to meet on Saturday, at Machida station at seven. I want to sneak out so Sakata won't tail us, I want to be alone with him.” Hiki answered.  
“But it’s dangerous to go without a bodyguard, Nii-chan. I don't think it's a good idea, you should take Sakata with you. And you don’t really know that guy.”  
“Agreed.” Kaito nodded.  
“I'll be fine, but I need your help with this. Hacchan, I need you to make sure that no one will come to my room. Everyone gathers at the big dining room around six for the family dinner with father, so I’m gonna use that as an opportunity. No one will wander around and I can sneak out of the back door. But you’ll have to tell the others that I’m in my room working on a project, and that you’ll bring me my serving. You can just put the plate on my desk.”  
“Alright, I can do that.” Hajime saluted like a soldier.  
“I will stay overnight to support you too. We have your back… and I don’t want to miss out on this, it’s kinda thrilling, hehe. But you have to keep us updated.” Kaito said.  
“Yes, Nii-chan. Please text us all the time so we know that you’re alright. If you don’t, I’ll send Sakata after you.” Hajime promised with a stern face.  
“I will, don’t worry. Thank you guys.” Hiki smiled.

Then, Saturday finally came.  
Hiki felt like he was going to burst from excitement. He didn't sleep much, although he went to bed early, but he was just too wired up. He tried to distract himself by reading, but he couldn't focus. When he ended up reading a paragraph for the third time, but still hadn't caught what was going on, he decided to soak in the bath for a while.  
But that appeared as a bad idea, because it gave him even more space to overthink. In the end he racked his brain over the smallest things, like if he should wear a yukata to the festival. In the end he went with blue jeans, a light blue hoodie and a black fake leather jacket. He tied up his long hair to a ponytail like always, and was all set at six o’clock. Kaito, who had stayed over in Hajime’s room the night before, and Hajime knocked on his door.  
“Hey Hiki, we’re heading downstairs now. I’ll send you a message when everyone has gathered.” Kaito whispered.  
“Alright, thank you!” Hiki became even more tense than before all of a sudden.  
“Nii-chan, please take care and don’t forget to send a text from time to time… and-”  
“Are you kidding?” Kaito interrupted him. “He will probably make heart eyes at his crush the whole time and forget that we even exist!” Kaito teased Hiki.  
“Shut up, idiot.” Hiki mumbled and blushed. Kaito and Hajime chuckled and went downstairs.  
A few minutes later Hiki got a text from Kaito.  
“Coast is clear! Good luck!”  
Hiki took a deep breath, opened the door and peeked out. No one was in the hallway, so he rushed downstairs and dashed towards the back door.  
He really made it!  
Next hurdle was the long way through the yard, and since there were guards posted at the gates 24/7, he had to take another way out. Hiki also had to be careful, because there were cameras everywhere, but he arrived at his destination undetected.  
Covered by some bushes, there was a hole in the fence that he had discovered when he was a child and luckily, it was still there! He had grown a lot since the last time he snuck out, but he still fit through. He had to be very careful not to get dirty or to rip his clothes, but again, the odds were in his favor and he managed to get through safely. He had to run to the station, because that took more time than he'd expected. He had to hurry or he'd be late!

When he breathlessly arrived at the station, Howl was already waiting at the main entrance. He was wearing a blue suit without the jacket, and a light blue shirt. _So handsome..._ , Hiki thought as his heart skipped a beat. He wanted to catch his breath for a second before approaching him, but Howl had already spotted him and beckoned him over.  
“Ueda-kun, good evening.” he smiled warmly.  
“Gooh-... Good evening, Hah-... Harada-san.” Hiki panted.  
“Hm? Why are you out of breath, did you run here? What about your driver?” Howl wondered.  
“Well, I kind of... snuck out… I wanted to be alone with you...” he mumbled.  
“Jeez, you can’t strain yourself like that before our date has even started. Hmm...If you’ll get too tired later, I’m just gonna carry you.” Howl grinned playfully.  
Hiki’s face was already red from his recent exercise, but he still managed to flush even more.  
“N-No way, Harada-san!” he protested, but his heart jumped.  
“But...will you be okay without a bodyguard?” Howl asked concerned.  
“I’ll be fine, please don’t worry.” Hiki smiled reassuring.  
“Alright. Well then, let’s get in the car, it’s too far to walk from here.”  
  
Hiki’s heart was pounding during the short drive. The car was filled with Howl’s scent and he was sitting so close... Hiki tried his best to stay calm.  
It didn't take long for them to arrive at the festival. Howl parked the car and then they had to walk through a small forest to get to the festival ground. The sun was setting and the scenery was flooded in atmospheric orange light that made it look like everything was glowing. Hiki spotted the first booths from afar and he got so excited, he couldn’t hold back anymore.  
“Oh, there it is!!” He jumped. “I wonder what kinds of booths there will be! They will probably have a lot of food stalls, right? And sweets! I love sweets! Cotton candy, candied apples, dango… I wonder if they have Kakigori already, since it’s not summer yet... Oh and I want to catch a goldfish! I’ve seen that in an anime before! There are so many things I want to try!”  
Howl chuckled. “Right, you mentioned that this is your first time visiting a festival. That’s probably why you’re this excited.”  
“...Isn’t it normal...?” Hiki blushed while looking down shyly. “I only know these things from the television, and I’ve always wanted to visit a festival since I was little.”  
“Don’t worry, it’s okay to be excited, Ueda-kun. I’m very excited as well, because I’m here with you, you know? So please don’t hold back, okay?” he smiled at Hiki.  
“O-Okay…” Harada-san always knows what to say to make me feel better, he thought and returned his smile.  
They finally arrived at the festival ground. The air was filled with all kinds of luscious smells and there were a lot of people. Kids were running around in their little yukata, shooting at each other with water guns, laughing and squealing, the murmur of the crowd was mixed with sizzling sounds from the food stands and various melodies from the carousels and game booths. The atmosphere was great, and Hiki’s eyes wandered around restlessly, trying not to miss anything. Hiki was like a puppy that was out for his very first walk. His purity was so refreshing, Howl loved watching him.  
“Ueda-kun, are you hungry?” Howl suddenly asked after he noticed that Hiki unconsciously had placed his hand on his stomach.  
“Huh? Oh…” Hiki was so in awe that he didn’t realize, but his stomach was growling. He was really hungry. “Yeah, I think so. I skipped dinner, and...” he looked at his watch, “wow, it’s almost nine. I should probably eat something, hehe...”  
“What would you like to eat then?”  
“Hmm… maybe... Takoyaki... or...Karaage? Or maybe Yakitori? Oh, or Yakisoba! Ahh, there’s so much delicious food I’d like to try... I should just pick something from the nearest stall. But the sitting areas are kinda crowded, maybe I should wait a li-...wah!”  
Suddenly Howl grabbed Hiki’s wrist and dragged him away to a narrow path behind the festival ground. Hiki’s heart was beating fast as he realized that they almost held hands!  
It had become dark already, and only the lights from the festival illuminated the path. Howl lead Hiki to a bench.  
“Ueda-kun, please sit down and wait here for me, okay? I’ll be back in a few minutes.”  
“Uhm, okay...” He did as he was told and Howl headed back to the fair. Hiki didn’t know what he was planning, but now that he had thought about all the food, he had become even more hungry. He wanted to distract himself until Howl came back, so he took his phone and sent a message to Kaito.  
“We’re at the festival, everything’s okay.” he wrote and got an immediate reply.  
“Finally you’re texting, we were worried, idiot! Are you having fun? Did he kiss you yet? Did he use his tongue?”  
Hiki rolled his eyes.  
“No, he did not and he won’t! But I am having fun. It’s awesome here and Harada-san is really cool.” He smiled.  
“Take care and don’t do reckless things, use protection!”  
“Tche... Idiot.” Hiki said out loud and put his phone back into his pocket.  
“Hey, what did you just call me you little shit?”  
Because he was typing, Hiki hadn’t noticed the three men that were passing by. They reeked of alcohol.  
“I asked what did you just call me?!” One of them yelled at Hiki. That guy was massive.  
“I wasn’t talking to you.” Hiki answered calmly.  
“You called me an idiot! Who do you think you are?!” He staggered towards Hiki and was now standing in front of him, his two friends on his left and right.  
“No, I didn't. I told you, I wasn’t talking to you, so just keep walking.” Hiki was severely annoyed by these drunkards.  
“You little bastard, I could crush you with my little finger!” he grabbed Hiki by the collar of his sweater and pulled him up. Hiki had training in self defense as a kid, but he still knew the basics, so he immediately reacted and used his arm to wipe off that guys hand. He clearly didn’t expect that.  
“Whoa that was quick, did you see that? He totally fought you off, hahaha!” the guy on the right said.  
“That was weak Matsu, gyahahaha!” the other one cackled. That his friends were making fun of him, pissed him off even more.  
“As if I’m gonna get defeated by this little fucker!” He grabbed Hiki by his collar again and raised his other fist. Crap, no way that move is going to work again, Hiki thought and squinted his eyes, expecting a punch in the face...  
“Hey, asshole… Let go of him,” a dark voice suddenly growled from behind, followed by a rustling noise. The three drunkards turned around.  
“Harada-san!” Hiki was worried that they’d attack him too, but he was relieved to see him.  
“Who the fuck are you? Fuck off,” the big drunkard yelled, his fist still ready to punch Hiki.  
“Let go of him and scram!” Howl’s voice became even more threatening and the menacing expression on his face made even Hiki shudder.  
“Mehhhh, come on Matsu, let’s go. ‘S not worth it,” one of his sidekicks said.  
“Yeah, let’s leave and get more Sake,” the other one agreed. Both started walking away from the scene.  
“Tch.” He glared at Hiki, roughly pushed him down on the bench and followed his friends.  
“Ueda-kun, are you okay!?” Howl hurried over and sat down next to him. He took Hiki’s chin and looked at him closely. Hiki swallowed. He was so close and he was touching his face...  
“I’m so sorry for leaving you unprotected. Did you get hurt?” Howl asked with a gentle voice.  
“I...I’m fine... really. Nothing happened.” Hiki’s heart was pounding.  
“Good…...” They stayed like this for a moment, before Howl let go of Hiki’s chin and got up. He walked over to where he had come from a few minutes ago, and picked up two big plastic bags from the ground. He brought them to Hiki and spread their content on the bench.  
“Harada-san, what did you-… Wow, so much food! But…” Hiki was speechless.  
“Well, you couldn’t decide, so why not just try everything,” he smiled, proud of his idea. “And it’s not that crowded here... It’s nice to have some privacy, right? I hope you don’t mind that we left the festival for now.”  
“Not at all! That’s very thoughtful of you, thank you Harada-san.” Hiki was too happy for words. Because of the incident with those strangers, he had forgotten how hungry he was, but he remembered as soon as he saw at all those mouth watering dishes. There was everything he had been craving earlier, and more!  
“Thanks for the food!” Hiki said and then they dug in.  
“Dif if foh goog, Hawada-fun!” he munched.  
Howl chuckled. “I’m happy you like it. We can try some sweets later, too.”  
Hiki’s mouth was too stuffed to answer, so he just smiled and nodded. Howl thought he was looking like a hamster and giggled. Hiki tried everything Howl had brought for him. He couldn’t even determine a favorite, everything was absolutely delicious.

“Jeez, I’m so full... Thanks for the meal! But... there are so many leftovers…” Hiki noticed after they were done eating.  
“You can take them home and eat them tomorrow.” Howl proposed.  
“Th-Thank you, Harada-san. But I don’t want to eat them without you…It would... feel lonely.” Hiki admitted hesitantly and blushed. Howl was surprised about his honesty and Hiki also was the cutest being on earth to him.  
“Then... how about we meet again tomorrow and eat them together?” he suggested. “We can buy something for dessert later as well.”  
“Sure! I’d love to!” Hiki shined overjoyed.  
“How about I pick you up at the station again, and we have dinner at my place?”  
“Yes! That sounds great!” Hiki was ecstatic… he was really going to visit his place!  
They packed everything up and headed back to the festival, where they had a blast together. Hiki managed to catch two goldfishes and was planning on putting them into their pond in the backyard. At a Shateki booth Howl shot a little black cat plush for Hiki, and afterwards they munched their way through the sweets stalls. Hiki had noticed that Howl kept looking at his watch, and then, all of a sudden, he said: “Ueda-kun, come on, this way! Hurry!” and started to walk faster. He was almost running, Hiki had a hard time keeping up with his pace and he was confused as to where Howl was taking him, but he followed him diligently. They left the festival ground behind them and walked deeper into the forest. After a couple of minutes, they left their path and walked through the woods for a bit. Then they arrived at a glade. It was a remote area, so they were all alone, and they had a perfect view on the night sky from there. It was a full moon and the stars were shining bright. Howl put down the bags with their food and their prizes.  
“I’m glad we made it,” he smiled.  
“Harada-san, why did you bring me here?” Hiki asked, still confused. Howl looked at his watch again.  
“Ah, it’s midnight... Look,” he pointed up.  
Suddenly lights started flashing, followed by loud bangs and crackling sounds. The sky sparkled in all kinds of colors. Orange, green, yellow, red…  
“Uwah..., fireworks!” Hiki stared at it in awe. It was the first time he saw one in real life, and not only in TV. He was stunned.  
Suddenly he felt something touching his hand…  
He looked down and saw Howl’s hand holding his. He looked up to him, startled, but Howl was looking at the sky. Hiki felt like his heart was jumping out of his chest. They were holding hands!! He wanted to hold Hiki’s hand!! He couldn’t believe it. For a moment Hiki thought he was dreaming. The lights kept flashing and painted the darkness in beautiful colors, but Hiki was only focused on Howl.  
“H-Harada...san…”  
“Please...can you call me Howl?” He looked at Hiki and tightened his grip a little.  
“H-...Howl...?” His blush intensified. Howl turned to Hiki. He was taller than him, so he leaned over to bring his face closer to Hiki’s.  
“Ueda-kun…” he whispered. Hiki could feel Howl’s breath on his lips.  
“Hiki.” he whispered back. Howl gently placed his big hand on Hiki’s cheek.  
“Hikkun…” He pressed his lips on Hiki’s and kissed him tenderly.  
Hiki thought his heart would stop. He froze and his mind went blank. They parted with a soft smack, Howl left another kiss on Hiki’s forehead and embraced him lovingly. Hiki could feel Howl’s heartbeat, and it was just as fast as his own. He reflexively returned the gesture and clung onto him, his face buried into Howl’s chest.  
What just happened? Did he just kiss me? Really? Hiki thought. He was so confused, because he never thought it was possible for Howl to like him “in that way”... But at the same time Hiki was the happiest person on earth.  
“H-Howl… does that mean… that you... like me?” Hiki muffled into Howl’s chest.  
“No, I don’t like you.” he answered.  
Hiki’s heart throbbed. So was it just a friendly gesture without deeper meaning? Did Hiki misinterpret his kindness?  
Howl gently pushed Hiki away, grabbed his shoulders and looked at him sternly.  
“‘Like’ isn’t an appropriate word to express what I feel for you. I’m in love with you. I fell in love with you the moment I met you. Something like that never happened to me before, so I didn’t realize it at first, but it’s definitely love. I want to be with you, but you probably only see me as a friend, which is fine, I want to do my best to be a good friend as long as I’m just able to spend time with you. I don’t want to force myself on you, but I wanted you to know about how I truly feel... I just hope I didn’t scare you away and... that you don’t hate me now...”  
Hiki unconsciously teared up. Maybe it was the relief, maybe it was because of Howl’s words,... probably both...  
“Hehe,” he sniveled. “I feel the same for you, didn’t you notice? And now that you stole my first kiss, I can’t let you go anyway.” Hiki smiled and tightly embraced Howl again.  
Howl sighed in relief and enfolded Hiki in his arms. They stayed like that for a while, no words were spoken. Hiki had never felt so warm and safe in his life before. And although the fireworks were still exploding in the sky, all they could hear was their hearts beating in unison.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A big thank you to Ioana!!


	3. Moving on - Moving in

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hiki and Howl are moving in together! Or are they? Hiki is still a minor! What will his strict father have to say to that? Will Yasuhiro give his consent? 
> 
> This chapter is really long, I hope you'll like it :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Genkan: The place at the entrance door where you take off and leave your shoes in Japan before entering someone's home.
> 
> Wakame: Algae salad
> 
> The size for Super king size beds is: 194 cm × 205 cm // 76 in × 81 in - much space to fool around ;)
> 
> Kingyo Sukui: Goldfish scooping game at fun fairs in Japan

Hiki was on cloud nine after their kiss. Howl insisted on driving him home, so he gave in. But he dropped him off at a secure distance, so they wouldn't be spotted.  
Howl got out of the car and opened the door for Hiki and he got out.   
“Good night Howl-san. Thank you for all the wonderful memories.” he blushed and looked down shyly. He was still flustered by that kiss.  
“My pleasure,” Howl answered smiling. He caressed Hiki's cheek, lifted his head and kissed him again. Hiki placed his hand on Howl's and closed his eyes. He wanted this moment to last forever. They parted and Howl withdrew his hand. “Good night, Hikkun.” he whispered. “Be safe. I’ll see you tomorrow.”  
Hiki nodded in a daze, turned around and walked away. Howl waited until he disappeared in the bushes, to get to the hole in the fence. On his way through the huge garden Hiki replayed their date in his head. Suddenly he stopped walking, blushed hard and covered his face with his hands. “We kissed...!” he gasped. He wanted to jump around and scream, but he pulled himself together and continued walking.   
Hajime and Kaito were already waiting in his room. Luckily everyone else was already asleep. The moment he entered, the two of them bombarded him with questions.   
“How was it?”   
“Did you have fun?”   
“Did you bring souvenirs?”   
“Did he try anything?”   
“Did you confess to him?”   
“Are you going to meet again?”  
“Jeez guys, I literally just arrived, give me a second.” He knew they were waiting for his report expectantly, so he decided to tease them a little. Hiki pulled off his jacket slowly, put it back into his closet, placed the bags with the stuff from the festival on his desk, rummaged around in them for a while with no reason and then he slowly sat down.   
“Nii-chaaaaaaan!!” Hajime whined.   
“Oh, come on Hiki!” Kaito protested.   
Hiki giggled. “Alright, alright.”  
He told them everything that had happened in detail from the moment that he had left his room. About all the impressions from the festival, what sorts of booths had been there and how Howl bought all the food for him. He left out that incident with those drunkards, because he didn't want to worry them. Then, he finally reached the part with the fireworks. “...And then he kissed me.” Hiki covered his blushing face with his hands.   
“Whoa, seriously? Nii-chan, you're so lucky!” Hajime yelled envious.   
“He kissed me again when he dropped me off and tomorrow I'll go to his place.” Hiki muffled into his hands, peeking through his fingers.   
“I'm relieved, Hiki. I’ve never heard you talk about anyone so fondly before. It was obvious that he's very special to you, so I was worried about what would happen if he'd reject you.” Kaito said earnestly.   
Hiki took down his hands. “Kaito…” he whispered, touched by his best friend’s words.   
“Yeah, same for me, Nii-chan. I’m happy that he feels the same for you. I wanna meet him!”   
“No way! Not yet. It’s only our third date...well technically our second real one, the first one was just a casual meeting. It’s kinda funny…I feel like I’ve known him my entire life.”  
“Maybe you’re soulmates.” Hajime said.   
“Maybe we are…” Hiki replied with a soft smile. “Anyhow, I brought some sweets for you guys.” he changed the topic. The two boys rejoiced as Hiki handed them various treats from the festival. They ate and talked until they became sleepy and went to bed.

On the next day Hiki and Howl met at the station again. Hiki was very curious about what Howl’s place was like. They didn’t talk much on their way there, Hiki was just too nervous. Howl asked some questions to start a conversation, but Hiki only gave short answers. He felt bad, but he couldn’t help it. He felt tense and excited and because of that he didn’t sleep much the night before. He already had been nervous before their festival date, but ever since their first kiss it seemed as if he wasn’t able to calm down.  
“We’re here,” Howl announced after a while. They stopped in front of a huge skyscraper and slowly took a turn to the parking garage in the basement of the building.  
“Are you okay? You’re very quiet today.” Howl asked him on the elevator upstairs.   
“Oh, uh yeah, sorry. I’m okay.” Hiki smiled. “It’s a huge building... On which floor do you live?” He wanted to end this awkward mood between them.   
“I live on the top floor. Since this is an office building, my apartment was an office once too, but I thought it would be convenient to live in the same building I work in, so I asked the owners if they would sell the whole floor to me as a condominium, and after some bargaining, they eventually did. As soon as I got permission for the construction works, I had part of it converted into an apartment.” He explained like it was the most normal thing on earth.  
“Whoa… really? That’s amazing!” Hiki was very impressed.   
“Well, if I have a goal, I give my all to achieve it. The constructions were done pretty fast. I hired the company of my assistant’s son and they did a great job.”  
“B-But wasn’t it super expensive?” Hiki blushed as he realized that his question might had been a bit too personal. He came from a good situated family, but he had always been very economical with his money.   
Howl chuckled. “It’s okay to ask, don’t worry. My father had worked very hard all his life, but he was very careful with his money. He always said that he wanted me and my sister to have a good and carefree life, and as little worries as possible as adults, so he saved up. And when he passed away, Sophie and I inherited the money. When we became full of age, his lawyer paid us out and I used my part to found my own company.” Howl explained openly.  
“I see. I'm sorry for your loss, Howl-san. Sounds like he was a great dad.” Hiki replied thoughtfully. Howl smiled and ruffled through Hiki’s long hair. “Thank you, Hikkun,” he smiled.  
The door of the elevator opened and they walked down a hallway covered in black gravel. Howl went ahead and opened the door to his apartment.  
“Feel free to make yourself at home,” he invited him. Hiki left his shoes at the genkan and walked in.   
“ Wow! It’s so spacious!” he gasped. The genkan was connected to a short, open hallway. At the end of it was a huge room that was divided into two areas by a thin wall. On the right, there were only some black cupboards and a small table with two chairs. On the left, there was a small, black leather sofa and a small flat screen TV. The hallway continued to the right and several rooms branched off from there.  
“Over there is the master bedroom, a bathroom, my office and a storage room that was planned as a guest room, but I rarely have guests. The master bathroom and a dressing room are only accessible from the master bedroom. And at the end of the hallway, there’s a big spare room that I can't decide what to do with. Maybe I'll make it into a library one day, or maybe I'll get a sauna or something. This is the living room, divided into sort of a chill lounge and a dining area, and over there is the kitchen. That service hatch was the architect’s idea.” Howl shrugged. Hiki was in total awe over the size of Howl’s apartment.   
“Why don't you put a dining table in front of the hatch, wouldn’t that make sense?” He asked.   
“I rarely cook for myself. I mostly eat out or order in and eat on the sofa while working. Eating alone is no joy, just a necessity.” Howl answered.   
“I think so too. I love to cook, but since we have a chef, I don’t get the opportunity to do it often. She’s very possessive over her kitchen.” Hiki slightly rolled his eyes.   
There wasn’t much furniture in the condo. Everything was very minimalistic and modest... and everything was in black, mixed with chrome. No decorations anywhere, except for a framed picture on one of the cupboards. It showed a black haired man with a little blonde boy and girl sitting on his lap. They looked happy…   
“So, what do you think?” Howl asked curious and pulled Hiki out of his thoughts.  
“Uhm… Well I think it's great, it’s so spacious and all, but… it seems so… unlike you.”  
“Hm? What do you mean?”   
“The interior gives off such a cold vibe, but being around you feels so warm… So it's like the complete opposite of you.” Hiki blurted out.   
Howl went silent for a moment while looking around.   
“Oh no, I'm sorry! This is your home, I'm so sorry for being rude!” Hiki panicked.   
“It's okay, don't worry. You're just honest. And you're right, it doesn't really feel like a home to me. You know, such a big apartment for only one person can make you feel very lonely, so I spend most of my time at work and only come here to eat, sleep and shower. I had no motivation to make it more homey, since there was no one I was able to share it with.” Howl admitted. Hiki’s heart throbbed and he followed his urge to hug Howl tightly.   
“Howl... you’re not alone anymore, okay? I don't know if I'm enough, but if you’re okay with it, I'll come here as often as I can,” he promised. Howl smiled fondly and hugged Hiki back. “Thank you Hikkun...” was all he could say before all of a sudden Hiki's stomach growled very loud. Hiki blushed and buried his face in Howl’s chest in embarrassment. “Oops,” he muffled. “Way to ruin the mood.”  
Howl laughed wholeheartedly and Hiki thought it was the most beautiful sound he ever heard. “Come on, let's eat something. Sounds like you're starving,” he proposed giggling. “Make yourself comfortable on the sofa, I’ll go and get the food. I also prepared fresh Wakame.” Howl announced as he walked over to the kitchen to pick up their festival leftovers.  
For dessert they had candied strawberries and chocolate bananas while watching a movie and later, Howl brought Hiki back home. 

From then on they met every day. Howl was extremely busy with work, but he always managed to make time for Hiki, so they could at least have a coffee together. Hiki had to travel to Tokyo for job interviews anyway, but three months later he still hadn't found one. One day he visited Howl for lunch at his office after another disappointing interview.   
“I seriously can't believe this. Why does nobody wants to hire me? What's wrong with me?” Hiki whined frustrated. “It’s already August, Uni will start next month and I still don’t have a job or a place to live. I made no process at all.” He sighed heavily.   
“Hikkun…I know this might seem sudden, but... how about you move in with me?” Howl suddenly asked.   
“Huh…!?” Hiki was so surprised, he almost dropped his chopsticks.  
“I was thinking about asking you for a while now. I mean…my condo is big enough, you could even have your own room. And T-Uni is only a few minutes away. And the most important part…I would love to live with you. We would have more time together, even when we're busy. You don't have to tell me your answer now, think about it first.”  
Hiki was completely flabbergasted. He nodded and promised Howl to think about it.   
On his way home Hiki’s thoughts revolved around Howl’s proposal. He felt torn and wasn’t sure what to do, so when he arrived at home, he called Hajime who was out with friends, and asked him to come to his room later. He also called Kaito and asked him over.  
A few hours later they arrived. They all sat down on Hiki’s bed and he explained the situation to them.   
“Okay wait, let me get this straight. He asked you to move in with him? Into his palace of a condo in Tokyo? Wow!” Hajime was stunned.   
“I know, it seems a bit rushed…” Hiki replied insecurely.  
“I don't think it’d be rushed at all.” Kaito stated. “You two have met every single day since your first date and you basically spend all your free time together. Driving to Tokyo and back all the time, or him having to come to Machida… it’s wasted time. Time you two could also spend together. Also, you said it yourself. It’s close to your Uni, right? You could see each other off every day and come back home to each other like a married couple. Wouldn't that be awesome?” Hiki was a little surprised, he never took Kaito for the romantic type.   
“Yeah, it would be…” The mere thought of it made Hiki’s heart beat faster.  
“I also think you should do it if you really want to, Nii-chan. I mean it will suck not having you around, but I know that you feel lonely here. Ever since you met him, it's like you're glowing. I honestly think it would be good for you, because he's good for you.” Hajime nodded eagerly.   
“Hacchan…” Hiki was deeply moved. And thinking about it, he was probably right…   
“Do it Hiki!” Kaito cheered in agreement.  
“You two will need the approval of our father, though, since you're not 20 yet. That won't be easy, you know how he is…” Hajime added concerned.   
“I… I know. I'm worried about that, but even if he says no, we can just wait, as long as we will be together in the end.” Hiki smiled hopefully.   
“Yeah, if he says no, it's just a matter of time. Your bond is strong enough to easily wait, two years will be over in the blink of an eye!” Hajime grinned and gave Hiki a thumbs up.   
“Thank you for always being so supportive, guys. I’m going to miss you.” Hiki smiled lovingly.   
It was settled. Tomorrow he was going to tell Howl the good news.

For the first time in a while Howl had invited Hiki to his place. He hadn’t been there since that one time on the day after their festival date. But they just didn't have the chance, Hiki thought. They always met at cafés, restaurants, or whatever was convenient when Howl had time in between work. Or Hiki visited him at his office during lunch break.   
He had a Job interview on the same day that went really well, so Hiki was already in high spirits when he headed over to pick up Howl at his office like he had asked him to. When they arrived at the front door, Howl said: “Hikkun, I have a surprise for you. I know you didn’t like my apartment before, and neither did I. Like I told you before, I didn’t have the motivation to make it more homey… until now. I want you to feel comfortable when you visit me. And… in case you decide to move in, I want you to have a real home, so,...” Howl opened the door. “I gave the condo a little makeover.”  
He took Hiki’s hand and lead him inside. Hiki couldn’t believe his eyes, was that really Howl’s condo? Before, the interior was minimalistic and everything was in black and chrome. But now there was a long dining table with blue chairs, beautiful white cupboards and bookshelves, the small black leather sofa was gone and in its place there was a huge white couch. He even bought a bigger TV, and there was a table in front of the serving hatch now, just as Hiki had suggested. All the furniture was white with some blue accents here and there, Hiki’s favorite color. His mouth and eyes were opened wide as he walked around and looked at the new interior in outright amazement.   
“Howl, this...this is… incredible! You call that a “little” makeover? You changed everything, even the wooden floors are a lighter color now!” Hiki shouted out astonished.  
“That’s the reason I didn’t bring you here in so long. Let me show you around.” Howl, still holding Hiki’s hand, lead him over to the other side of the hallway and opened the first door on the right.  
“This is one of the bathrooms. The toilet is in a separate room over there. It also has a corner bathtub and a shower as you can see.” Howl explained, while Hiki was stunned by that luxurious bathroom. “The next room is the office.” Howl announced and opened the next door, that lead to a room with a big, blue shaggy rug in the middle and two desks. One was a glass desk and the other one was a white wooden desk.   
“This one is mine, and the white one is yours, for your studies. And a shelf for all your books.”  
Hiki couldn’t say anything, but apparently his expression said enough, because Howl looked pleased. They moved over the next room. “This is your room. I know you didn’t answer my question yet, but I wanted you to have this room nonetheless. As your personal space for whenever you visit me. I want you to choose a bed, cabinets and such yourself, that’s why it’s still empty. What do you think?” Howl looked at Hiki, expecting a big smile on his face, but what he saw was the complete opposite of that.   
“I don’t like it.” Hiki pouted.   
Howl was confused. “Uhm, I’m sorry if I crossed a li-”  
“I don’t want my own room. I don’t need it. I want to sleep in the same room as you… and in the same... bed.” Hiki flushed. “Can’t we make it a guest room instead, in case my brother, Kaito or Sophie want to stay over?” He looked at Howl with his big bright eyes.  
“Hikkun...O-Of course! We can make it a guest-... wait… does that mean…?”   
“I already decided yesterday, but I wanted to tell you face to face. I would love to move in with you, Howl.” Hiki sparkled excited, and an overjoyed Howl squeezed him tight.   
“I’m happy. So happy, Hikkun,” he mumbled.  
“Me too.” Hiki grunted, almost squashed by Howl’s powerful hug. “We'll have to ask my father for his consent, though. That will be tough. What if he says no…?”  
“If that happens, we'll just wait. I'd wait ten lifetimes for you, Hikkun. As long as we can be together in the end, I can put up with anything.” Howl assured him confidently. That put Hiki at ease and he smiled fondly. “You're right.”  
“There’s still a lot of work to do before the condo will be completely done. We have to buy decorations, kitchen interior, furniture like...a new bed for us. My old one is definitely too small, it’s only a normal double bed.” Howl declared.   
Hiki blushed at the thought of him and Howl sharing a bed soon. There hadn’t been much space for intimacy until then, although they kissed a lot when they had the chance. Howl was a great kisser, Hiki thought...  
“Hikkun?” Howl pulled him out of his daydream.   
“Oh, uhm yeah we should get decorations and… and a bed,” he l giggled awkwardly.  
“Let’s go shopping then.”   
“What? Now?”  
“Why not? Although I wanted to show you your surprise, but we can do that later or so. I’m too excited now, let’s go buy things for our new home.” Howl smiled broadly.   
“Ah but… I don’t have any money right now...since I still don’t have a job…”  
“Well, I do, so let’s go.” Howl grabbed Hiki’s wrist and wanted to drag him along, but Hiki didn’t move.  
“But you can’t just pay for everything just like that. Also, what about the rent? And living expenses… I mean today’s job interview went well and the payment would be really good, but even if I get the job, it won’t be enough.” Hiki frowned.  
“Hikkun, listen, I know you want to share the costs and that it’s important for you to do so, but you don’t have to worry about those things. I bought this apartment, there is no rent. And I will take care of the rest. You can pay me back by living with me and by blushing a lot.”  
“I don’t blush a lot!” Hiki blushed.   
“You do, and I’m going to make you blush even more in the future.” Howl promised with a playful smile.  
“Hey, what’s that supposed to mean?!” Hiki blushed so hard it made Howl laugh and as Hiki realized, he buried his face in Howl’s chest in embarrassment. Howl was internally swooning over his cuteness. Then he continued: “Also,... how about you cook for us?”   
Hiki raised his head in surprise. “Cook...? That’s a great idea! I would love to cook for us! Oh, and since I’m home more often than you, I could also take care of the household!” He sparkled. Taking care of the things around the house would make him feel less like a freeloader, he hoped.  
“See, you’ll contribute an important part to our partnership. No need to worry about something stupid like money.” Howl smiled reassuring. “Alright, let’s go shopping now!” 

 They left immediately and went to four different furniture stores. It was exhausting, but in the end they got everything they needed, and more. They got the decorations, some furniture like dressers and shelves, interior, a bed for the guest room and a new bed for them. Hiki wanted a normal double bed, but Howl insisted on a Super King sized bed. He said that he needed space while sleeping and “various other things”. Hiki’s imagination went crazy in the middle of the store, so he was too flustered to object. The furniture delivery was scheduled on Saturday, so they determined that as the day Hiki would move in.   
When they arrived back at the condo, they ordered in, made themselves comfortable on the new sofa and took a break to eat dinner.   
“Haa… this is so cosy and nice. Sitting here with you...” Hiki sighed relaxed as he leaned back after they were done eating.   
“We’re going to have this every night. I can hardly wait.” Howl smiled fondly as he leaned back as well and looked at Hiki with loving eyes. “Oh, Hikkun, when are we going to meet your father to ask him for permission? We should do that soon…”  
Hiki’s heart throbbed as he realizes that it was inevitable.   
“I asked his assistant this morning, and on Wednesday he’ll have his last appointment at four. Family dinner is at seven, so we’ll have to talk to him in between. I already made an appointment at six, I figured that might be most convenient for you. Is six okay?”   
“Wednesday at six… Yes, that'll work.” Howl nodded.   
Hiki paled. He knew that it would be a very unpleasant situation, to put it mildly.   
“Hikkun, are you okay? I know that you two aren’t close, but...it almost seems as if you're scared of him...” Howl caringly took Hiki’s hand to comfort him.   
“It’s just…I'm afraid that he won’t approve of us. I don’t want to wait for two more years to live with you…Of course I would, if I have to, but I want to move in here as soon as possible, so we can be together more often. And I don't want things to escalate, my relationship with my father isn't the best as it is…” Hiki explained nervously.   
“Hikkun, would you... please tell me more about your family? We haven’t really had the chance to talk much about our pasts so far. Only if it’s okay for you, of course…”   
Hiki nodded tentatively, took a deep breath and started.   
“Hmmm… where do I begin...? Maybe with my mother...First of all, I think I had a good childhood. My sister Harumi is the first born. She’s seven years older than me. She was supposed to be the heir of the family business, but she refused to take over, because she wanted to be a housewife and live a normal life. She’s married and has a four year old daughter named Tae. Her husband Tadao is a very nice guy. He’s a University Professor and he always speaks so passionately about his work, it inspired me to become a teacher. They live in a separate house on the same property as the rest of my family. We don’t talk much either, though. From time to time she asks me to watch her daughter, but that’s it. Then, there’s Hiroki, five years older than me, he’s the second born. He’s going to inherit the family business now, so he’s working a lot... he’s rarely at home. We used to have a really good relationship. When I was a kid, I often snuck into the dojo to watch his training. He’s really cool... but ever since our brother Satoshi died…”   
Hiki paused for a moment and swallowed heavily. “...Hiroki became quiet and cold. M… My brother Satoshi… he was the third child. He was four years older than me and he was really awesome. Always smiling and full of life... I don’t think that I ever saw him angry or anything like that. Everyone loved him. But… when I was 11 years old,” Hiki paused again and looked down, with a face full of sorrow. “I’m sorry, but I’ve never talked about this with anyone before…”  
“Hikkun,” Howl tightened his grip around Hiki’s hand. “If you don’t want to…”  
“No, it’s okay, I want to tell you. It’s okay if it’s you.” He took a deep breath and continued. “Back then, I had been hospitalized and when I was released, Hiroki and Satoshi picked me up. They wanted to take me to an arcade to cheer me up and to celebrate my ‘freedom’ as they called it.” Hiki smiled lovingly. “It was my first time to visit one, so I was super excited. Especially after having been at the Hospital for weeks with no visitors. Except for Satoshi, he passed by occasionally whenever he had time. On our way there...a rival yakuza clan showed up and started a fight. Luckily we had guards with us. My brothers tried to settle it peacefully because I was with them, but...it escalated. They were just too aggressive, reasoning was useless. They started fighting and I was really scared that my brothers would get hurt. Hiroki told Satoshi to protect me and bring me back to the car so I wouldn’t get hurt. He dragged me with him, but I wasn’t able to run, because I was still too weak from my illness. We stopped so I could catch my breath, but suddenly Satoshi pushed me and I fell on the ground. Then, two shots were fired. One of the other family’s kyodai had a gun with him. Before I even realized what was happening, Satoshi dropped down on the pavement right next to me. There was so much blood…” Hiki’s chest tightened and his eyes started burning as he recalled the memories he had tried to bury deep down inside for so long. “The… The bullets hit him in the chest… but only because he was protecting me. They were meant for me… If he hadn’t pushed me away...” Hiki paused again. Howl was utterly shocked.   
“Hikkun…” He mumbled softly. Hiki cleared his throat.  
“I’m fine. Hiroki and one of the guards put Satoshi on the backseat of our car. His head was resting on my lap. I remember caressing his head, crying and begging him to stay awake, but he coughed up blood and died on our way to the hospital.” Hiki felt his throat tightening, but he continued nonetheless. “Nothing was the same after that. My mother blamed me for what happened. At the funeral she had a nervous breakdown. She was crying and screaming that it was all my fault. If they wouldn’t have brought me to the arcade, he would still be alive. And for a long time, I believed that too. That if I wouldn’t have been so weak we could’ve gotten to the car faster and he wouldn’t have died. Or that the bullets should’ve just hit me...I think Harumi was blaming me too, even though she never said it out loud. Due to a mental illness, my mother often locked herself up in her room for weeks and didn’t want to talk to anyone. But sometimes, when she felt good, she was cheerful and loving, I enjoyed those phases a lot. I was happy to have a mother like that, even though it never lasted for long. And after Satoshi died, it became even worse. She stopped talking to me completely. But I have a few good memories with her, that’s enough for me. With my father I used to have quite a good relationship. Even though he was rarely there because of his work, he used to be very kind to us if we were good and behaved. But after that incident he became completely distant and cold. What happened back then broke their hearts and I honestly thought that I should’ve been the one who died. I felt like I had no right to live, and there was no one I could talk to, about my feelings. Today I think that it was just an accident. Neither of us deserved to die. I also don’t think that person wanted to kill anyone, he just lost control over that damn gun. At least that’s what I want to believe, because I saw his face after Satoshi dropped down, and he stared at us in utter disbelief and shock. I will never forget his expression. It’s etched in my memory, just as Satoshi’s face when he died.  
But Hajime was there for me. He’s one year younger than me and he’s just like Satoshi. Although he was only ten years old, he always cheered me up with his shenanigans. It’s only thanks to him that I didn’t drown in sadness, grief and loneliness back then, but... I never talked about what happened or my feelings with him.” Hiki smiled fondly at the thought of his beloved little brother. “I didn’t want to burden him even more, he already had it hard enough with everything and everyone around him changing...He shouldn’t have had to go through that. Luckily it didn’t change him. I tried to give back a little when he decided to come out as gay a while ago. Our father made a huge fuss over it, but he accepted it eventually. Even though he’s distant and very strict, we know that he cares a lot about us and he just wants us to be happy. That’s what all parents want, right?” Hiki looked at Howl, who stared at him with tears in his eyes. He pulled Hiki closer and embraced him tightly. Hearing what his lover had been through broke his heart. So much sadness and loneliness at such a young age would leave most people scarred and traumatized...Being able to overcome something like that required a lot of strength, Howl thought.  
Hiki felt surprisingly relaxed, even after digging up all those dark memories. It was liberating to talk about them, but still, it was tough on him and Howl’s warm embrace was exactly what he needed.   
“Thank you for telling me all this, Hikkun. I feel honored that you trust me so much.” He let go of Hiki and looked him straight in the eye. “If you ever feel sad or lonely, please let me know, okay?”  
“Hm… you know, before I met you, I really do think that I was lonely. Even though I had Hajime and Kaito, I always felt like something was missing. But when I met you, suddenly everything changed. I felt...complete. So as long as you’re by my side, it’s impossible for me to feel lonely.” Hiki smiled broadly and made Howl’s heart skip a beat. He felt so incredibly blessed for having this wonderful person in his life. He smiled fondly, leaned over, cupped Hiki’s cheek in his big hand and kissed him.   
“Mh… Howl...what about you?” Hiki asked when they parted.   
“Me?”  
“Yes, I also want to know everything about you...if it’s okay...”   
“Of course it's okay, but let’s do that another time. Remember that surprise I was talking about…” Although Hiki didn’t seem fazed, Howl felt the urge to cheer him up. He wanted to see his lover happy.   
“Surprise? Oh right, you mentioned it earlier.”  
“Want me to show it to you now?” Howl raised his eyebrows.  
“Yes, please!” Hiki answered excited. They got up, Howl took Hiki’s hand and lead him down the hallway to the very last door. Hiki remembered Howl saying that he wasn’t sure what to do with that room. He said something about a library or so.   
“I hope it'll be to your liking.” Howl smirked as he opened the door. Hiki walked inside and his jaw dropped instantly. He didn't know what to say, he was simply stunned. Howl was wearing a pleased expression on his face.   
“Judging from your reaction, you seem to like it.” he grinned.  
“L-L-Like? LIKE?? That's a pool! A pool in our apartment!? H-How?” Hiki squealed.   
That Hiki was calling the condo “our apartment” made Howl incredibly happy.  
“It wasn't easy to be honest. We had to check the construction plans and everything, to make sure the building’s static could hold a pool. It's not that deep, but since it's long, you can have a good swim. It almost didn't get ready in time, the construction company did a miracle.”  
“I-Is that a jacuzzi??” Hiki was ecstatic.  
“It is, and over there is the sauna. That was my personal request.” he smiled.   
“But why all this?”   
“Remember on our first date, when you played Kingyo Sukui? You said that you love water a lot and that you feel at ease when you’re swimming. You also said that you always wanted your own pool ever since you were a kid, so here you go.” Howl said casually, as if he had just handed him a chocolate box.   
“You did this for me?” He turned around to Howl, stood up on tiptoe, took Howl’s face with both hands and kissed him. “Thank you so much,” he whispered and hugged him tight.   
“Hikkun, there are no words for how happy you make me every day. I wanted to give back a little of that happiness.” Howl explained, returning Hiki’s gesture.   
“But Howl, you already make me happy just by breathing.” Hiki said and kissed him again.   
He opened his mouth and… yawned. “Oh no, I'm sorry!” he giggled ashamed.   
“You must be exhausted. No wonder, it was a really long day. I’ll drive you home.” Howl offered and kissed Hiki again.   
“It was a long day for you too, you should rest. And I’m being tailed, remember? I’ll just hop into my guard’s car, he can take me back home.” Hiki smiled.   
“I wish you could just stay.” Howl pouted childishly.   
“Soon.” Hiki’s heart skipped a beat at the thought of living together with Howl by the end of next week. They made plans to meet up for lunch on the following day and then Howl showed Hiki off.

Wednesday came, and Howl went to Machida to meet Hiki at the Ueda family’s house and talk to his father. Hiki picked up Howl at the front door and they walked to his father’s office together. Howl wasn’t nervous at all, but Hiki was very quiet and pale, which worried him, but there was no chance to talk to Hiki in private before meeting his father. Howl came from an appointment and was lucky to make it just in time. He wished he could have comforted him.  
When they arrived at their destination, Hiki took a deep breath and knocked. When they heard a muffled “Come in”, he opened the door. Yasuhiro was sitting behind his big, black desk on his throne-like office chair.   
“I’m honestly surprised to see you here,” he immediately addressed Howl without greeting them whatsoever. “Well, of course I know that you two are meeting quite often, but I didn’t expect you to show up here with my son today.” His friendliness from their first meeting a few months ago had turned into an almost hostile behaviour. Yasuhiro seemed like a lion on a hunt.   
“Hello, Ueda-san. It’s nice to meet you again.” Howl greeted him politely and bowed. Hiki didn’t say anything, but he bowed as well and they sat down.   
“So... you made an appointment with my assistant, hm? Why did you want to see me so urgently, Hikaru?” Although Yasuhiro was sitting down, it almost felt like he was towering over them.   
Howl glanced over to Hiki, who looked like the lamb the lion was hunting, forced into a corner. The urge to protect his lover rose in him. “Ueda-sa-” Howl started, but Hiki interrupted him.   
“Father...” Hiki straightened his posture, but he was looking down humbly. He gathered all his courage. “I want to move in with Ho-...Harada-san. I want to live with him in Tokyo.”   
“I won’t allow it.” Yasuhiro answered harshly.   
“Father, I-”   
“I said no.” He replied with a firm voice.   
“Father, you don't underst-”  
Yasuhiro suddenly slammed his fist on the desk so hard, for a second Howl thought it might break. Hiki flinched, but he kept his posture. He looked determined and imperturbable.   
“Believe me, I understand very well! Do you think I'm an idiot? I know what's going on between the two of you. Your guards report everything back to me. I know when you meet, and where. I won’t allow you to live with him and that’s my final word. This kind of thing is unacceptable between two men.” Yasuhiro growled.  
“I think you're getting something wrong here, father. I'm not asking for your permission, I'm telling you that I will live with Howl, no matter what. I don’t want to be disrespectful, but this is my decision, it's my life and I’m not a kid anymore. But since I'm not full of age yet, I'd still need your consent to move in with him. Though even if you say no now, I will leave the day I turn 20.” Hiki was trembling a little and he had trouble breathing properly. He couldn't believe that he actually had the guts to say that.   
“Ueda-san,” Howl took Hiki’s hand. “I know you don't like the idea, but Hikaru deserves to be happy after everything he's been through, don't you think?”   
“Tch, what do you know… You think you can make my son happy?”  
“I will do everything I can to achieve that and make it my main goal in life.” Howl answered enthusiastically.   
Hearing those words from him made Hiki incredibly happy, even in this tense situation.   
“You have no idea what you two are getting yourselves into. People will start talking. You own a company, you might lose clients. Most people in this world are narrow minded and judgemental. Are you sure you can handle that?”  
“Yes, father. I know you're not allowing it because you're worried about me, but I'm fully aware of what lies ahead of us. I can put up with anything as long as I have him by my side.” Hiki replied confidently, now looking his father straight in the eye.   
“Ueda-san, I will take good care of your son. I don't worry about clients and such. Even if I'd lose everything, it wouldn't matter as long as he's there. I'm sorry, but I can't let go of your son.”  
Yasuhiro went silent for a few minutes and glared at them critically. Howl was still holding Hiki's hand and they both looked at him determined, as if they're ready to fight the world just so they could stay together. He realized that they wouldn't give up on each other, no matter what. He leaned back and sighed loudly.   
“It's no use, I guess. Harada-san, you're a good man. Take care of my son and make him happy. But if you hurt him, they'll find your body in Tokyo Bay.”   
“Got it! Thank you, Ueda-san!” Howl got up and bowed deeply. Hiki teared up. They really did it!  
“And Hikaru,” Yasuhiro continued, “I give kudos to you for speaking up. You stood up for yourself and were ready to fight for what you wanted. Good for you. But it's the first and last time I will allow you to disobey me like that and to raise your voice against me.”  
“Understood, I'm sorry. Thank you, father!” He got up and bowed as well.   
They said goodbye and left. Howl took Hiki to Ramen Jiji’s before he had to go back to Tokyo.   
“Uwaahhh, that was thrilling!” Hiki huffed as he slumped down on his seat. “I honestly thought my heart would stop any moment,” he huffed.  
“I’m so proud of you Hikkun, you did great. I was really worried about you back there.”   
“Ah, I was fine. It’s just that sometimes it feels like I’m still a little boy when I talk to him. Just like when I had a bad grade and got punished for it. He ordered us to his office for that, that’s why I don’t like being there. But now that it’s over, I feel relieved. We can start our life together now, isn’t that great?” Hiki sparkled. Howl leaned over and kissed him.  
Hiki couldn't have been more happy. Everything was just too good to be true.   
Saturday came fast and with that, it was time to move. They got their furniture delivered in the morning, and while everything got set up, Howl drove to Machida to pick up Hiki and his belongings. Hajime helped loading the car, and Kaito came over to say goodbye. Since it was the first time Howl met them, he invited them out for dinner to a restaurant in Machida. They had a long talk and Howl had to answer many, many questions. To Howl’s enjoyment, Hiki was embarrassed by a lot of them and kept blushing. The mood was very easygoing and relaxed, they had a lot of fun and Howl invited them to come over whenever they felt like it. Then, it was time for Howl and Hiki to go, because there was a lot of work waiting for them at home. They said their goodbyes, and Hiki and Howl left for their new life together.   
“Are you sad?” Howl asked in the car on their way back to Tokyo.   
“A little bit, because I won't be able to see them as often as before. But mostly I'm happy. Very, very happy.” Hiki smiled. Howl took his hand and kissed it.   
“I'm happy too. I love you, Hikkun.”  
“I love you too, Howl.”

 

 

Howl's Condo before Hiki moved in

Their Condo after the makeover


	4. The first time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hiki finally moved into the condo. But the next adventures already lie ahead.

Chapter 4 - The first time

Hiki sat down on the big sofa, right next to Howl. He laid down, rested his head on his lover’s lap and sighed out loudly.  
“Finally done. The moving part wasn’t that hard since I didn’t bring much stuff, but renovating and decorating an apartment this big was quite a task. I could really use a nice, hot bath.”  
“Alright, you go and soak in the bath, and I’ll drive over to that little restaurant you like so much and get dinner.” Howl offered, while caressing Hiki’s hair.  
“Are you sure? You’re tired too, aren’t you?” Hiki asked concerned.  
“You did all of the decorating, I just assisted. And the furniture from the stores were delivered and assembled by their staff. Plus, I didn't have to work today, so I’m not tired at all.” Howl assured him.  
“Alright, I’ll go take a bath then. No, wait... Kiss me.” Hiki demanded and Howl followed his order. He smiled and kissed his lover softly on the lips. “Okay, now I can go.” Hiki smirked and got up. But right when he took the first step, Howl grabbed his wrist, pulled him back, and Hiki landed on his lap.  
“Wah, Howl! What the-”  
“Five more minutes.” Howl said and twined his arms around Hiki. “I need to recharge.”  
“No, I’m sweaty and smelly, it’s gross. And you said that you’re not tired, so you don’t need to recharge! Let go!” Hiki protested.  
“Hmmm… it’s not gross at all. You smell good. If I could bottle you, I’d shove you under my armpits every day.” Howl joked and sniffed him. Hiki bursted out in laughter.  
“Ew, no! What are you doing, you weirdo?! Pervert, let me go take a bath already!”  
“Nooo, stay~ Stay right here with me. Don’t go~” Howl tightened his grip around Hiki and nuzzled up against him.  
“You’re acting spoiled? That’s new.” Hiki giggled while brushing through his lover’s hair with his fingers.  
“Isn’t it okay to act spoiled from time to time…? I wish we could stay like this forever...”  
“We can stay like this forever if you want to.”  
“Really?” Howl looked at his lover with hopeful eyes. Hiki placed a soft kiss on his lips and whispered: “Yes... After I take a bath.” Then he tickled Howl, who jolted and reflexively released him, Hiki jumped up and fled to a safe distance.  
“Hey, that’s cheating!” Howl whined, pouting.  
Hiki stuck out his tongue, winked and grinned teasingly and headed to the bathroom. Howl chuckled and sighed lovestruck before he got up and left to get their dinner.  
During his refreshing bath Hiki thought about all the good things that had happened to him since he met Howl. He had never been so happy in his life. Before, he felt like he only existed, but now he felt alive. He felt blessed to wake up next to that wonderful man every morning from now on.  
“Oh…” Hiki suddenly realized something. This would be the first time they slept together in the same bed. Hiki’s heart started racing as he fantasized about the things they’d do in bed except for sleeping. He didn’t even think about doing perverted things with Howl before. Sure, they cuddled and kissed, but Hiki was pretty satisfied with that, since they never had the opportunity to take the next step anyway. He wondered if Howl had done it before. With women probably, but with a man? His heart felt heavy at the thought of Howl doing such an intimate thing with someone other than him. He wondered if he should ask him... He finished up his bath and when he got back to the living room, wearing his favorite mint colored polka dot PJ’s and a towel on his shoulders for his still wet hair, Howl was already back.  
“Ohh it smells so good in here!” He walked over to the kitchen.  
“Take your seat, Hikkun. I’ll bring the food. I got Yakisoba and strawberry daifuku as dessert, I hope that’s okay,” he said as he unpacked their delicious looking meal.  
“Oh, yes! That’s great!” He rejoiced and did as he was told. Hiki, hungry from all the physical work, dug in like there was no tomorrow. When they were done, he leaned back, held his belly and moaned: “Thanks for the meal. Uwah, I’m stuffed! I didn’t realize how hungry I was until I saw the food.” He giggled. “......Atchoo! Oh, excuse me, hehe.”  
“Hikkun, you’re going to catch a cold, you should dry your hair properly!” Howl scolded him.  
“Urgh, but it’s annoying. It’s so long, it takes forever to dry.” Hiki pouted.  
“Come on, let’s go over to the sofa.” Howl got up and walked ahead, with a slightly confused Hiki following him.  
“Howl, shouldn’t we clean up fi-”  
“Sit down.” Howl, who had already taken a seat on their big white sofa, interrupted him and pointed on the floor right in front of him. Hiki’s confusion rose, but he did as Howl said. Howl took the towel from Hiki’s shoulders and started to gently rub down his hair. Hiki blushed as he realized what was going on. That was such a couple thing to do…!  
“Hikkun, are you okay?” Howl asked when he noticed Hiki’s glowing red ears. Hiki nodded.  
“Y-Yeah...I’m just... so happy…” he mumbled, feeling like a million butterflies were dancing the Macarena inside his stomach. “Me too, Hikkun.” Howl smiled fondly.  
Hiki had planned on asking Howl about his past lovers, but savoured Howl’s head massage too much, and didn’t want to ruin the mood, so he held back with his questions and just enjoyed the feeling of Howl’s big hands gently drying his hair.  
After a while Hiki’s eyelids started to feel heavy and he nodded off.  
“Hikkun…? Are you falling asleep?” Howl smirked, swooning over his lover’s cuteness internally.  
“Oh...I’m sorry. I guess this is a bit too relaxing,” he giggled ashamed and rubbed his eyes drowsily.  
“You’re exhausted, let’s go to bed. Your hair is dry enough now.” Howl decided.  
“Un.” Hiki nodded. He was kind of sad that it was over already. Howl got up and walked ahead.  
“Wait for me~” Hiki jumped up, ran after Howl and crashed into him when he suddenly stopped.  
“Unf… Wah, I’m sorry!” Hiki apologized flustered.  
“Easy there, Hikkun,” Howl chuckled and gently ruffled his hair. “I’m not going to vanish, you know,” he smiled. Darn it, he’s just too cute, Howl thought. He took Hiki’s hand and they walked to the bathroom together.  
While Hiki brushed his teeth, Howl changed into his light blue pajama pants and a white V-neck shirt. Hiki secretly watched him from the corner of his eye and blushed, but unfortunately he could only take a glimpse of Howl’s back.  
“Mh… Howl…?” Hiki suddenly addressed him when he was done.  
“Yes, Hikkun?” he replied as he walked over to the sink to brush his teeth as well.  
“Earlier… I was thinking about something…” Hiki stammered while looking down on the sink shyly.  
“What is it?” Hiki’s weird behaviour had grabbed his attention.  
“H-Have you ever been... intimate with someone?” Hiki finally dared to ask. This was probably something that bothered Hiki a lot, so Howl took his question very serious. He finished brushing his teeth, turned around to his fidgeting boyfriend and looked him in the eyes and cupped his face with his big, warm hand.  
“I have been intimate with other people before, but you’re the first person ever I fell in love with. Before, I was sure that I was unable to fall in love. I tried to be in relationships, but they never lasted. The longest one lasted for six months. I always got tired of them quickly and they told me that they couldn’t stand when I looked at them with that stern expression, or that I never smiled or laughed. At one point I gave up on trying to find a partner, but then I met you and everything changed.” Howl caressed Hiki’s cheek with his thumb and smiled at him.  
“How many?” Hiki asked monotonically. Howl knew how much of an effort it cost Hiki to ask all this.  
“I had five girlfriends, but I was only intimate with two of them. The last relationship I was in lasted three months and it was 4 years ago.” Howl answered honestly.  
“What if you get tired of me as well one day?” Hiki couldn’t believe how irrationally insecure he felt all of a sudden. He felt stupid for saying something like that, he didn’t even mean it. Howl moved closer to him, took his face with both hands and stared at him intensely.  
“Hikkun, did you listen to what I just said?”  
“Y-Yes.”  
“I’ll repeat it, so listen closely. I have never loved anyone in a romantic way in my entire life until I met you. I love you more than words can say. The word love can’t do justice to the feelings I have for you. I don’t want to be apart from you ever again. Do you understand?”  
“Y-Yes!” Hiki’s face was beet red. He felt like an idiot for acting like he did.  
“I’m sorry for saying such stupid things, I don’t doubt your feelings. I don’t know what got into me… It’s just that… you’re the first person I ever fell in love with too, but I’ve never been intimate with anyone before, all my firsts belong to you. I kinda hoped it would be the same for you, although I knew that it wasn’t.”  
Howl withdrew his hands from Hiki’s face and embraced him. “I’m sorry, that that’s not the case, but rest assured, that no one ever was as special to me as you are and no one will ever be, okay? I get that you’re jealous, I would feel the same. Actually, I feel jealous all the time. Even if you only talk to others or smile at them. You’re mine and I’m yours and that will never change, got it?”  
“Got it.” Hiki whispered and clung onto his lover. He felt much better now.  
“Good. Let’s go to bed now, you should rest.” Howl released Hiki from his embrace, took his hand and they walked over to the bedroom.  
Their new super king size bed looked very inviting. Hiki was glad that Howl was so stubborn about buying such a big bed. Their bedroom was spacey, so they also put a huge, cozy couch in there and an armchair that was standing in front of the fireplace. Most of the rooms in the condo had windows that reached from the floor to the sealing, offering a stunning view over the city’s skyline. When it became dark outside, the lights of Tokyo’s illustrious nightlife gleamed in the distance. Hiki loved this place so much, he still couldn’t believe that this was his home now.  
“Which side of the bed do you prefer, Hikkun?” Howl asked as they took off the bed cover. “Hmm… I only ever had a single bed, so I’m not sure. What about you?”  
“I don’t care, as long as I can sleep next to you.” Howl answered bluntly.  
“That’s so cheesy!” Hiki giggled, but blushed at the same time. “O-Okay, umm… I don’t know… Let’s see...” He hunkered down, jumped up and landed, face first, on the big bed.  
“Oof!” He rolled over to the left and snuggled against the soft pillow. “Hmmm…” He moved around and tried out different positions. Eventually he rolled back to the right and repeated his evaluation. Howl observed Hiki’s bustling activity with a broad smile. He couldn’t help but picturing him as a little kitten, rolling around in a big cat bed.  
“Hmmm...I can’t decide…This side is better, but something feels off…” Hiki pondered.  
“Wait a second…” Howl got into the bed and moved to the middle. “Come here.” He smiled and opened his arms. Hiki scooted over to Howl with no hesitation and snuggled up against him, their arms wrapped around each other.  
“Ahhh, yes. This is it.” He sighed peacefully. They stayed silent for a while, just listening to their heartbeats and feeling their warmths.  
“Howl…?” Hiki, already half asleep, mumbled.  
“Yes, Hikkun?”  
“Can we go for a swim tomorrow?”  
“Sure.”  
“I’m happy…” Hiki nuzzled up against Howl’s chest. His cuteness should be illegal, Howl thought. He wanted to eat him up.  
“Howl…” he whispered.  
“Yes, Hikkun?”  
“I love you... So so mush...” and with that he drifted off.  
“I love you too, my sweet Hiki.” Howl whispered and smiled lovingly, kissed his boyfriend on the head and fell asleep as well, feeling like the luckiest man on earth.  
When Hiki woke up the next morning, he felt warm and comfortable, but he was a little disoriented. He rubbed his eyes and as his view cleared, he saw the city outside of the big window, shimmering golden in the light of the bright morning sun and remembered where he was. That’s right, I’m in my new bed, in my new home, living my new life with...  
“Good morning, Hikkun.” a raspy voice whispered into his ear. He turned his head and looked at the drowsy, ruffled love of his life, who was lying behind him, holding him in his arms.  
“Good morning.” Hiki smiled, turned over to Howl and snuggled against his chest.  
“Did you sleep well?” Howl asked, nuzzling against Hiki’s head.  
“I did. It was like sleeping on clouds.” Hiki said. “Mhh...”  
“What is it?”  
“...We’re so close, I can hear your heartbeat.” he whispered and closed his eyes to focus only on that mesmerizing sound. Howl’s warmth, his scent and his heartbeat… Hiki felt so wholesome and at ease. They both were so relaxed, they fell back to sleep...

Some time later, the ringing of their landline phone woke them up. At first they tried to ignore it, but when it didn’t stop, Hiki decided to pick up the call.  
“Mmmmnnhhhh…” Hiki groaned as he wanted to get up, but Howl didn’t let him. “Howl, let gooo…the phone is annoying.” he begged.  
“No. Don’t wanna.” Howl pouted, clinging onto his lover.  
“I’ll be back in a second, promise.”  
Howl gave in and released him. Hiki got up and trotted over to the living room. His target was the table right next to the sofa, where the still ringing phone was placed on.  
“Hello?...Oh...I see...Yes, please send him up. Thank you.” Hiki put the phone back on its charging station and froze for a moment. Then he came back to his senses and dashed back to the bedroom.  
“Howl, get up!” Hiki shouted while hastily changing from his pajamas to blue jeans and a white shirt. “We’re having a visitor!”  
“Who’s rude enough to disturb us on a Sunday morning?” Howl growled. “Just unplug the damn phone and come back to bed, it’s cold without you.”  
“It's already noon... I'll go and open the door, so get dressed, hurry! He’s our first visitor, I'm so excited! Oh crap, we didn’t clean up last night!”  
“He? Who? Hikkun, what’s going on, who’s visiting us?” Howl was so confused, but instead of explaining, Hiki rushed over to the dining table to quickly clean up the leftovers of their dinner before their guest arrived on their floor.  
Because they lived at the top floor of an office building, with hundreds of people going in and out every day, Howl had arranged the setup of a device that made it necessary to use a key card in the elevator to reach their floor, and the normal elevator button had been deactivated. Howl had it installed right before Hiki moved in for “safety precautions”, he said. Since his company provided the equipment, and his employees installed it, the owners of the building agreed. Hiki had told him that he was being overprotective and that such a thing wasn’t necessary, but Howl insisted on it. If they had guests, the security guard in the lobby called Hiki and Howl, and after they gave their okay, he used his key card and sent them up to their floor. Hiki still thought it was too much of a hassle, but he gave in, because Howl could be really stubborn.  
Suddenly their doorbell rang. Hiki jolted and his heart jumped. He ran over to the door and opened it. There was a tall man standing in front of him, with a well-groomed scruff and a big scar on the left side of his face. He wore a black designer suit…and he looked extremely agitated.  
“W-What are you doing here?” Hiki blurted out. That wasn’t the person he was expecting.  
“Tch. Is that how you greet me?” he snubbed.  
“Ah! I'm sorry! It’s just that...when the guard said that my brother wanted to visit me, I thought it was Hajime. I didn’t expect it to be you... P-Please come in.”  
The man stepped inside, left his shoes at the genkan, entered their hallway and looked around discerningly.  
“So this is where you live now? Not half as bad as expected… Nevertheless, I’m here to take you back home,” he announced emotionless. That came completely unexpected and startled Hiki.  
“A-Aniki, I-”  
“Hikkun, who is this? Do you know him?” Howl came out of the bedroom, dressed in black jeans and a pastel pink polo shirt.  
“Howl! Um yes, this is-”  
“You must be Harada-san. My name is Ueda Hiroki, I'm Hikaru’s oldest brother. I’m here to take him back home,” he answered coldly.  
“Is that so? What makes you think that Hikaru will go with you?” Howl tried to retain his composure, but he felt provoked and had a hard time doing so.  
“You see, when I came back from a two week long business trip, my father told me that Hikaru had moved out and is now living with another man. I'm concerned about his well-being. Moving out all of a sudden, living with someone he just met, and a man at that... That's not like him at all.”  
“Aniki, I-” Hiki tried to pipe up, but those two bawlers didn’t give him the chance.  
“Please excuse my bluntness, but what do you know? You have barely talked to him in the past few years, right? So how do you know if it's like him or not. You don't have to worry, your father wouldn't have agreed to this if your brother’s well-being would be in danger, don't you think?” Howl couldn't hold back anymore. Showing up out of the blue after not being there for Hiki when he would have needed his big brother the most, spurting out such nonsense… Howl was seriously pissed.  
“Howl, plea-”  
“Tch! You have no idea what you're talking about! You think you know my brother better than I do? For how long do you even know him? Don’t be ridiculous!”  
“Guys-”  
“I don't know him for as long as you do, that's true. But I can take way better care of him than you!”  
“Don’t make me laugh!” Hiroki chuckled artificially.  
“Well, you did a bad job at that, and that’s a fact.”  
“How dare you-”  
“HEY!!!” Hiki yelled and finally got their attention. “You behave like grade schoolers fighting over a candy bar! Seriously, I've had enough of you two blockheads with your stupid alpha male behaviour!!” Hiki grabbed his cardigan and his backpack and opened the door. “Call me when you're done locking horns!!” He slammed the door behind him, leaving the two startled wranglers behind.  
“...I've never seen him like this before. I never saw him yell at someone. Especially me...” Hiroki broke the silence.  
“I think we should talk, Ueda-san.” Howl proposed, and with a hand gesture he offered Hiroki a seat. “Coffee or tea?”  
“Tea.” Hiroki answered shortly.  
Howl assumed that Hiki wasn't just losing his temper. That wasn't like him at all. He was usually not one to raise his voice against others and he'd most likely take a beating before fighting back. Hiki was angry, there was no doubt, but it felt like he wanted to give Howl and Hiroki some space to settle their dispute.

Meanwhile Hiki was heading out of the building, down the street. He was so angry at the two of them… although, as he thought about it, he was actually more sad than angry. He was sad to see his family fight over such stupid things. Hiroki and Howl were both so important to Hiki, he had imagined their first meeting to be different. He would've liked to have his brother's consent, and he didn’t expect him to be against his relationship with Howl. His big brother always seemed so open minded after all... he didn’t feel like walking around aimlessly, and he was kind of hungry, so he went to a nearby café. He ordered some donuts filled with strawberry jam and hot chocolate with whipped cream and rainbow sprinkles. He needed sugary comfort food. Settling down at the counter, he promptly indulged in his soothing meal. He took the first bite and the glaze of the freshly baked Donut melted in his mouth, his taste buds exploding as the sweet and warm strawberry jam spread out on his tongue. He closed his eyes while the tenseness was giving way to relaxation, and a soft moan escaped his sugar glaze covered lips.  
“You really seem to enjoy your meal,” someone chuckled. An unfamiliar voice pulled Hiki out of his ecstatic state. Hiki glanced to his right. There was a tall man in his 30’s with black, slicked back hair, wearing a dark blue suit standing in front of the seat next to him.  
“Is this seat taken?” The stranger smiled.  
“N-No, please help yourself.” Hiki answered flustered, he felt caught for some reason.  
“Thanks. Looks good, may I ask what you have there?” The man sat down. Hiki didn’t really feel like having a conversation, but he also didn’t want to be rude, so he answered.  
“They’re sugar glazed donuts filled with strawberry jam. They’re really good.”  
“Oh, I see. And the glaze is pink like your hair, that’s cute,” the man chuckled.  
“Right…” Hiki replied briefly and took another bite.  
“My name is Fujimura Touma. With the kanji for mountain top. Nice to meet you. And you are?” He smiled brightly at Hiki who started to get a little annoyed of this weird, obtrusive stranger. He just wanted to binge eat his donuts in silence, calm down from the situation earlier, give Hiroki and Howl some time to talk things out, and go back home…  
“My name is Ueda… Hikaru.” His answer didn’t seem to satisfy that man. “W-With the kanji for brightness…” he added hesitantly.”  
“Oooh, that name suits you!” He smiled again, but Hiki didn’t notice. He focused on finishing his meal, and he was worried over Howl and his brother. He wondered if they would really use the time to talk it out, or if they were fighting even more after he left.  
“So, Ueda-kun… Do you come here often?” The stranger still tried to start a conversation with him, but suddenly Hiki’s phone rang. He frantically rummaged around in his backpack and finally found it. Seeing Howl’s name on the display, he took a deep breath and asked: “Are you two done?”  
“We're done.” Howl answered.  
“Did you continue fighting after I left?”  
“No, we didn’t. We talked it out like adults. Please come back home. It's lonely here without you.”  
Hiki's heart skipped a beat.  
“Alright Howl, I'll come back. See you in a bit.” He hung up and smiled fondly as he pressed his phone against his chest.  
“Howl? What an unusual name,” the man next to him noted. “Was that a friend?”  
Why was that guy so meddlesome, Hiki wondered.  
“My boyfriend,” he answered bluntly. “I’m sorry, it was nice to meet you, but I have to go. Have a nice day.” Hiki grabbed his backpack, his cardigan and his hot chocolate, and dashed out. He would’ve bid farewell in a more polite way, but Hiki had to admit that he already forgot that guy’s name. And shortly after he left, he had forgotten about him completely. The only thing he could think of was to get home and see Howl. Although he was only gone for about an hour, he missed him already. And he felt bad for yelling at him, he wanted to apologize. Hiki picked up the pace.

“I’m home!” he said naturally when he entered their condo and froze upon a sudden realization; that was the first time he had said that.  
“Welcome back.” Howl, coming over from the living room, greeted him and kissed him on the forehead. Hiki blushed. It felt like they were a married couple.  
“So you’re done with your quarreling?” He asked to distract himself from his overflowing feelings. He took off his cardigan, while Howl was holding his hot chocolate, and hung it on the coat stand.  
“Like I told you on the phone, we talked it out,” Howl said as they walked over to the living room. Hiroki was sitting on the sofa, so Hiki sat down there as well. Howl handed him the warm paper cup and settled down right next to him. “We agreed that the most important thing here is that you’re happy,” Howl continued and smiled at his blushing lover.  
“I want to hear it from you, Hikaru.” Hiroki interrupted him. “Are you happy with this man?”  
“Aniki,” Hiki stood up and straightened his posture. “Please excuse my bluntness, but I’ve never been so happy in my entire life. I love him more than words can say.” His heart was racing, but he made sure to hold eye contact with his brother during his confession, hoping Hiroki would acknowledge his little brother’s innermost feelings, just like their father did.  
Hiroki chuckled. “Look at you acting like an adult with that serious look on your face. You know, all I want for you is to be happy and to live a good life... Alright then, I’ll be on my way.” He got up and walked over to the front door, followed by a puzzled Hiki and a contentedly smiling Howl.  
“Take good care of my little brother, Howl-san,” he said as he gave him a pat on the back. “I might never win an award for being the best big brother, but I do care about him a lot.” He winked at Hiki, who smiled brightly.  
“I will.” Howl answered with a firm voice and rested his arm on Hiki’s shoulder. Hiroki nodded, opened the door, and walked outside.  
“A-Aniki…! I know that you’re very busy, but...please feel free to drop by whenever you’re around, okay?”  
“Alright.” Hiroki took a last look at Hiki and Howl. They were standing next to each other so closely that not the slightest ray of light could’ve broke through between them. Hiroki chuckled. “Take care, Hicchan,” he smiles and left. Hiki immediately turned to Howl, wrapped his arms around him and buried his face in his chest.  
“Hikkun, is something wrong?” Hiki shook his head.  
“He called me Hicchan... He hasn’t done that since I was a kid. And he gave us his consent... Howl, I don’t know what to do, I’m so happy,” he gasped.  
“I’m happy too. Happy and grateful to have you in my life, Hikkun.” Howl returned Hiki’s embrace and placed his right hand on Hiki’s head. “To be honest, even if your Aniki wouldn’t have given us his consent, I wouldn’t have let you go back. You’re my Hikkun and I can’t live without you anymore,” he said with a soft voice, while caressing his lover’s hair.  
“I wouldn’t have gone back anyway, no matter what. Because the thought of not being with you… I can’t stand it!” Hiki tightened his grip. “But Howl,...what did you say to him to change his mind like that?” He looked up, curious for Howl’s answer.  
“It’s a secret,” Howl grinned arcanely.  
“Eeeeh, how mean! Come on, tell me~” Hiki yammered.  
Howl leaned over and kissed him softly on the lips. “I missed you, Hikkun.”  
“But I was only gone for an hour.”  
“You up and left just like that, and I had no idea where you went. And you were angry... I don’t want you to be angry at me.” Howl looked at him with such a sad expression it made Hiki’s heart throb.  
“I went to a café and ate donuts. I have the bad habit of stress eating junk food... I wasn’t angry at you, I was sad that you two were fighting. It hurt to see that. I’m sorry that I made you worry.” Hiki nuzzled up against Howl’s chest. He was just too cute, Howl had trouble not jumping him right there and then. He would’ve loved to grab Hiki and drag him to the bedroom, but he had the feeling that he wasn’t ready yet. Howl was very happy that no one had ‘plucked his flower’ yet, but that meant he had to take things slow. He didn’t want to pressure Hiki in any way. Once, pretty much at the beginning of their relationship, Howl had started to touch Hiki when they were kissing after they had lunch together in his office, but he asked him to stop. Hiki even apologized… Howl felt so bad for putting Hiki in that position, so he never tried anything again ever since. He was sure that Hiki would let him know somehow when he’s ready. Howl tried to ban all those dirty thoughts from his mind, but Hiki didn’t make it easy for him. He sighed. “Hikkun, didn’t you want to try out the pool?” A little diversion might be good, he thought.  
“Oh right, I forgot! I’m gonna get changed real quick!” Hiki stood up on his tiptoes to kiss Howl and then he dashed off to the bedroom.  
“I’m gonna prepare the sauna...” Howl said to himself, since Hiki had vanished already, and chuckled. He went to the pool room and got the sauna running. On his way back to the bedroom, he and Hiki almost collided.  
“Jeez, don’t run Hikkun. You’re gonna slip, please calm down a little,” he chuckled.  
“Sorry~ But I’m just so excited!” Hiki sparkled.  
Suddenly Howl blushed. Hiki wore nothing but purple colored trunks. It was the first time he ever saw Hiki like that. He peered at his naked upper body. His skin was white and flawless, except for the tiny beauty mark, that was peeking out of his trunks on the right side of his lower abdomen. His build was slender but defined, and his nipples...  
“Howl are you okay? Your face is all red...” Hiki asked worried, moving closer to him.  
“I'm okay! Go ahead, I'll be there in a minute!” Howl fled to the bedroom, trying to hide his flushed face.  
“Okay~” The clueless Hiki headed to the pool room.  
“Dammit, pull yourself together,” Howl scolded himself when he arrived at the master bathroom. He sat down on a little stool for a moment, he needed a breather.  
Meanwhile, Hiki was sitting on one of the sunbeds at the end of the room, right in front of the pool. The door leading to their living area was in the middle of the long room, with the sauna on the right and the pool and a jacuzzi on the left. There was also a little sitting area in the middle. The walls on the side and the front of the pool had been replaced with huge glass panes, so they had an amazing view when they were taking a swim. Hiki was all bubbly and couldn’t wait to jump in. But he wanted to wait for Howl, so he just sat there, stared at the water that sparkled in the bright sunlight, and started daydreaming.  
“Hikkun, aren’t you going to get in?” Howl’s voice pulled him back to reality. Hiki looked over to the entrance and Howl was standing there...with only a towel around his hips. Hiki couldn’t help but to inspect Howl’s body. Although he didn’t work out, as far as Hiki knew, his body was muscular and well defined. He remembered that a while ago Howl had mentioned that he liked to play tennis from time to time, so that might have been the reason... Hiki swallowed heavily.  
“Hikkun?”  
“Ah yeah! I was waiting for you...” He giggled awkwardly and flushed.  
“Alright, the sauna should be ready now, I’m gonna go in. Have fun in the pool.” Howl announced and turned to enter the sauna, when Hiki suddenly jumped up and walked over to Howl fast, trying not to run.  
“Howl! C-Can I…try it,” he stuttered.  
“The sauna?”  
“Yeah, I’ve never been to one. I’d like to try it...if you don’t mind.” Hiki looked at him with big puppy eyes.  
“Of...Of course I don’t mind, but let me know when it gets too hot for you, alright? I don’t want you to collapse.”  
“Got it!” he smiled, overjoyed to be able to get to experience something Howl liked together with him. And if Hiki ended up liking it too, they’d have a shared hobby.  
“You will also have to undress, though.” Howl added frankly.  
“Huh? But why can’t I go in like this?” Hiki panicked. Him and Howl both naked, sitting right next to each other in a tiny room? Hiki was way too shy for that, he thought!  
“You’re going to heat up faster and you will feel very uncomfortable, so please go change.”  
“O...Okay...” Hiki gave in.  
“I’ll go inside first and you can undress here. Over there is a towel you can use.” Howl said and entered the sauna. He was just as nervous as Hiki.  
A moment later the door opened, and a flustered, fidgeting Hiki walked in. He sat down on the wooden bench next to Howl. They stayed silent for a while.  
“...Wow, it’s really hot in here...” Hiki finally broke the silence and tried to start a conversation to get rid of the tension between them.  
“It will get even hotter, I’m gonna pour water on the hot stones, so we’ll have steam. Although...would you like to do it?”  
“D-Do it?” Hiki asked startled.  
“Spilling the water on the hot stones…”  
“Oh!! Ehhh? Really?” Hiki sparkled in excitement.  
“Yeah, just use that big wooden scoop, take water from the bucket and pour it on the hot stones.” Howl explained. Hiki did as Howl said. When he poured the water on the stones, there was a loud sizzling noize and the room filled with thick, hot steam.  
“Ohhhh, that’s so cool!!” Hiki exclaimed. To see how excited he became over trivial things made Howl giggle. Hiki sat back down. The tension was gone and they both enjoyed their time together, talking about this and that. From time to time they poured water on the stones, and the temperature rose. Hiki had fun, but gradually it became so hot, even talking was hard. It felt like the hot air was burning his throat. He had probably never sweat that much in his entire life, and the heat started to make him feel light headed. He glanced over to Howl,  
who was leaning with his elbows on his knees, so Hiki had a perfect view of his back. Sweat was running down his spine, his skin was shiny and moist. Hiki wanted to touch him so bad… A while ago, when they were kissing after they had lunch in Howl’s office, Hiki suddenly felt Howl’s hand slipping under his shirt and sliding up his spine. He liked it, but they were at Howl’s workplace, so he panicked and asked Howl to stop. He regretted it right away and apologized, but Howl seemed irritated about it and never tried to touch Hiki again. He wanted him to, but he was too shy to ask, and definitely too shy to make the first move.  
Without noticing it, Hiki’s hand had reached out and his hand slid down Howl’s back.  
“Hikkun? Are you okay? Come on, let’s get you out of here and take a break to cool down.” Howl wanted to get up, but Hiki grabbed his arm and stopped him. He wasn’t sure if the heat got to his head, but suddenly he didn’t want to wait for Howl to make the first move anymore.  
“I’m fine…” he huffed, leaned over to Howl, grabbed him by his neck, pulled him closer and kissed him keenly. “Salty…” he noted as he licked his lips after they parted.  
“Hikkun, what’s gotten into you? Are you having a heatstroke,” the startled Howl asked.  
“No... I-I just wanted to touch you. Is that a bad thing?” Hiki asked in a seductive tone, while letting his fingertips slide over Howl’s lips. Howl had no clue why Hiki was acting like that all of a sudden, but he sure didn’t want to complain. He leaned over and returned his kiss passionately. Compared to the hot air in the sauna Howl’s mouth felt cool. Hiki’s hand slid across Howl’s muscular, sweaty chest. He started to feel dizzy from the arousal or the heat… or both. Normally he was extremely shy, which worried him before they moved in together, because Hiki wasn’t sure how to act around Howl in certain situations. But in the end, everything felt so natural when they were together, that Hiki automatically abandoned his shyness completely.  
“Uhm...Howl...I...I want you to touch me...like this…” He took Howl’s hand and placed it on his chest, slowly directing it over his hard nipples, sliding downwards. Howl was startled by Hiki's sudden boldness.  
“Touch me more…,” he huffed with a shy expression on his face. “please...”  
“Alright, that's it. I can only put up with so much. I'm at my limit here.” Howl lifted him up and quickly carried his boyfriend to the bedroom. He would’ve taken him right there, on the pool room floor, but he wanted Hiki to be as comfortable as possible. He stopped in front of the bed and put him down carefully. Howl cupped Hiki's face with one hand and kissed him. One, two soft pecks, then he gently licked Hiki’s lips as a sign for him to open his mouth. Hiki did so and let Howl’s tongue slide in. Their deep kiss became more and more passionate. Howl’s hand moved downwards and slowly pulled away the towel around Hiki's hips.  
“Ngh…Wait!” Hiki was now completely naked. He was flustered and tried to hide his shame with his hands.  
“Hikkun…I love you. I want you. I want to touch and kiss every inch of your beautiful body, and… I want to be inside you. Is it okay?” He asked with a stern expression on his face, as a tiny sweat drop fell from a strand of hair. Hiki's heart skipped a beat. He had never heard him talk in that tone before, he had goosebumps all over.  
“Y-Yes! That is totally okay!” He couldn't control his voice and pushed out a high pitched yell. Howl chuckled. It was almost unfair how cute he was.  
They returned to their deep kiss, when Hiki suddenly interrupted and gently pushed his hand against Howl’s moist chest.  
“H-Howl, wait! Shouldn't we take a shower first? We're all sweaty…”  
“No need. We're gonna get sweaty again anyway.”  
“B-But…!”  
“You don't have to be scared. It won't hurt, I promise. I'll be gentle. If any of the things I'm going to do to you now makes you feel uncomfortable, tell me right away and I will stop.”  
‘Any of the things I'm going to do to you,’ Hiki repeated in his head and flushed. He nodded and their tongues entwined again, as Howl gently pushed Hiki down on the bed.  
“Move to the middle, Hikkun.”  
He did as he was told.  
“Just lie down and relax.” Howl said in that voice. He kissed Hiki on the lips again, but then he moved downwards to his neck.  
“Mh…”  
‘Relax’? Hiki thought. How on earth was he supposed to relax in that kind of situation?!  
Howl's tongue slid down from Hiki's neck to his perky nipple.  
“Nh, ah!” he moaned.  
“Salty…” Howl looked up to him and grinned.  
“Ngh! I told you, we should- AH!”  
Howl’s hand had moved to Hiki's already half hard dick. He gently grabbed it and let his hand slide up and down a few times, while licking and sucking Hiki's nipples. Hiki was moaning and panting underneath him. He had never experienced anything like that before.  
Then, Howl’s tongue moved further downwards.  
“Ngah! Howl, no!” Hiki panted, but protesting was useless. Howl’s tongue slid up and down Hiki's shaft before he finally took Hiki's erect penis into his mouth. Hiki felt like his head and chest were about to explode. Partly because of the embarrassment, but mostly from the pleasure he had never felt before. Sure, he had touched himself before, but the man he loved doing this felt almost overwhelming.  
“Ah! Howl…”  
Howl was taking in Hiki’s hard dick deeper and deeper. Suddenly he stopped moving, withdrew his mouth from Hiki’s dick, got up and took something from the drawer of his night stand.  
“Hikkun, I'm gonna put a finger inside now. It might feel weird at the beginning, but I promise once you get used to it, it'll feel really good. Are you ready?”  
Hiki wanted to scream ‘NO’, but he nodded. The look of Howl’s luscious blue eyes and his erotic flushed face were almost enough to make Hiki cum. Howl opened a bottle with a clear liquid in it and poured some on his hand.  
“Lean back, Hikkun, and raise your hips a little… good boy. Now spread your legs just a little more, please... That's it, Hikkun. You're being so good. I warmed up the lube in my hand, so it shouldn’t be too cold. I’m gonna start now, please try to relax...” Howl said as he placed his middle finger at Hiki’s entrance and started rubbing it gently. Hiki jolted from that sudden, unfamiliar sensation.  
“AH!”  
“Is it still cold? I’m sorry. You’re not familiar with using this part of your body for…well, for what we’re about to use it... but I’ll make sure to prepare you properly, so please hang in there and bare with me……” Howl said and pushed his finger in slowly. “See, it’s completely inside already. How does it feel?”  
“Nh...It...It feels weird,...but it doesn’t hurt.” Hiki’s face was bright red.  
“Good. Just stay like this, I promise it won’t hurt.” Howl started moving his finger in and out. “You’re still too tense, let’s see if I can help you relax more…” he said, leaned over and got back to sucking and licking Hiki’s erection.  
“AH! NO!” Hiki grabbed Howl’s head. The sensation of his slippery tongue twisting and sliding around his tip was almost too much for him. A mix of precum and saliva was dripping down from Howl’s mouth. The sensation of being pleasured in two places at the same time was unbearable.  
“Howl, please stop! Ah… I can’t anymo- AH,”  
Howl stopped moving his finger and released Hiki's throbbing cock from his mouth. Hiki felt incredibly embarrassed, because Howl was able to see everything. Places even Hiki had never seen. His heart felt like it was jumping out of his chest. He covered his flushed face with his hands and panted heavily.  
“Hikkun, I’ll add another finger now. Tell me if it hurts.”  
“I will, but please… no more licking or I’m gonna cum!” he begged desperately.  
Howl chuckled. “Alright, no more licking down here, promise.” He pulled his finger out and pushed two fingers back in slowly. He repeated his routine from before and pushed and pulled his fingers in and out, twisting and turning them from time to time.  
“You’re becoming soft here already. You’re a natural, I guess.” Howl chuckled.  
“I-Idiot. Mh! Ahh…”  
After a few minutes of thrusting, Howl added another finger, watching his lover’s reactions closely. At the beginning it had felt very weird, but now Hiki started to feel good. He started enjoying it... Maybe a little too much, because he was craving for more. He felt like Howl’s fingers weren’t enough anymore, and although Howl had big hands, his fingers just couldn’t reach deep enough.  
“HOWL! Ahh… Stop that already!” Hiki yelled, out of breath. Howl stopped moving instantly.  
“Are you okay Hikkun? Does it hurt after all? Although that would be weird considering how soft-”  
“NO! Just stop using your fingers! I want your…kh…” Hiki couldn’t say it.  
“You want my…? I won’t know what you mean unless you say it.” Howl had too much fun with this. Although he was past his limit and his dick had already been rock hard for a while, he held back for Hiki’s sake. Howl wanted him to have only good memories of his first time, but he was glad Hiki voiced his desires, so he knew that his lover was ready now.  
“Don’t be cruel,” he huffed, his hands still covering his face.  
“I’m not cruel. Didn’t I treat you gently until now? But I want to hear you say it properly.” Howl leaned over, took Hiki’s wrists and gently pulled his hands away from his face. He looked him straight into his glazed, teary eyes. “Tell me. What is it that you want me to do?”  
Howl’s teasing was a bit frustrating for Hiki, since he was sure Howl knew exactly what he wanted. But at the same time, it was exciting and he enjoyed this kind of play.  
“Kh…I-...I want you...to...put it in! I want you inside me, idiot! Ngh…” Hiki’s head felt so hot, he felt like he was back in the sauna. Howl grinned satisfied.  
“Alright.” He kissed him on the forehead and then on the lips. “Turn sideways, please.”  
“Eh? What? Why?” Hiki asked confused.  
“Since it’s your first time, it will be easier on your body if I enter you from behind and not in missionary. But I think you would consider doggy style as too embarrassing and might not be able to fully enjoy it, so we’ll do it sideways. Please turn around.” Howl explained.  
“How do you even know all that? I thought I’m your first man?”  
“Well…” Howl cleared his throat awkwardly, trying to hide his embarrassment. “I did some research. Online. For the past few months…since I met you...” He mumbled and blushed.  
Hiki couldn’t believe that Howl researched on the internet how sex between men worked. He thought it was crazily cute and considerate of him, so he decided to agree to his lover’s demands.  
“Alright.” Hiki did as Howl had said and turned around. He was now lying on his left side and Howl moved behind him.  
“You’ll have to lift up your leg a little, so I can enter you, Hikkun.”  
Hiki felt like instead of his heart, he had a little hummingbird inside his chest. He lifted his leg and held it up with his arm. After putting some lube on, Howl was getting in position. Hiki could feel his warm chest and his beating heart on his back. Apparently Howl was just as excited as him.  
“I’m gonna put it in now, Hikkun.”  
Hiki could feel something hot entering him, and it was definitely bigger than Howl’s fingers. It hurt a little, but felt good at the same time.  
“Ngh...AH! Mh…” Hiki moaned.  
“D-Does it hurt, Hikkun?” Howl panted while pushing in as slow as he could.  
“No...I’m fine...haa...I’m just so happy...W-We’re connected...kh!”  
“I’m all the way in now, Hikkun.” Howl announced after a few moments. “You did great. Just breathe and try not to clench too hard. I’m gonna stay like this for a minute, so you can get used to my size.”  
Hiki was panting hard. He felt tense and uneasy. There was no pain, but there was this weird, uncomfortable feeling of pressure inside his stomach. He knew that he was supposed to relax, but he couldn’t. Howl noticed that Hiki was struggling with the situation and started kissing his neck. At the same time his right hand reached over and grabbed his now only half erect dick. He started pumping,mainly focusing on the tip, since that was the place Hiki felt it the most.  
“AH! NO! Not there!”  
Hiki leaned back and pressed himself against Howl more, turned his head and looked him deep into the eyes.  
“Howl... please… move!”  
“As you wish.” Howl let go of Hiki’s now again fully erect dick and slowly started sliding out.  
“AH! NGH…HAA”  
He had a hard time going slow. All he wanted to do at that moment was to fuck Hiki as hard as he could. He wanted to devour him completely and thrust so hard into him, again and again, so that his body would remember his shape forever. He abruptly pushed back in and made Hiki moan.  
“Ah! You’re so hot...inside me...faster! Do it faster!” Hiki begged breathless.  
“Ugh... Hikkun, your insides feel so good. You’re so soft and warm and it feels like you’re sucking me in...nh…” Howl grunted as he started moving faster and more rhythmically. Hiki’s mind went blank and he felt all his power was leaving his body. He didn’t have the strength to hold up his leg anymore, but before he dropped it, Howl took over. They were moving together while Howl nibbled and licked Hiki’s neck.  
“Ngh ah! Uah!… Howl...I feel weird...It feels weird inside!” Hiki’s breathing became faster, he was covered in sweat, his dick was twitching and oozing precum.  
“Seems like I found your good spot, Hikkun,” Howl huffed as he pounded into Hiki relentlessly, aiming for his lover’s prostate.  
“No! Howl! I-I’m gonna…WAH!”  
“Me too, Hikkun. I’m close too.” Howl grunted and picked up the pace.  
“AH, AH! HOWL I’M - UWAH AAH!!!” Hiki shuddered and came while Howl kept thrusting into him, but only seconds later he pulled out and spurted his semen on Hiki’s thigh.  
They both breathed heavily as their bodies began to relax. Howl rolled on his back and Hiki followed him.  
“Haa... haa… Howl… that was amazing.” Hiki sighed.  
“It was your first time but you came only from behind… I told you that you’re a natural.” Howl chuckled. Hiki softly bumped his elbow into Howl’s ribs.  
“Stupid. But Howl, why did you pull out right before you came?”  
“It could upset your stomach, that’s why. C’mere.” Howl turned around to Hiki again and gestured him to come into his arms. Hiki rolled over and snuggled against Howl’s chest. Howl’s scent and his warmth were like a big, cozy blanket for Hiki’s soul. Their legs entwined. They couldn’t have gotten any closer than that.  
“Howl, we probably look like a pretzel.” Hiki giggled.  
“Probably…”  
“Thank you, Howl.” Hiki whispered.  
“What are you thanking me for?”  
“Because you’re always so considerate and cautious. You always look after me and I know I can trust you completely. Thank you for that.”  
“Are you an idiot? I’m the one that should be thanking you! Since I have you my in life, everything got better. My past always threw shadows on my life. I haven’t known true happiness until I met you. I love you with all my heart and soul, Hikkun.”  
Hiki wrapped his arms around Howl’s chest and hugged him tightly.  
“I love you too. More than words can say.” he mumbled.  
“.........Hikkun?”  
“...Mmmh?”  
“Don’t fall asleep. You’re butt naked and sweaty, you’ll catch a cold.”  
“It’s fine~” he murmured and nodded off.  
He’s completely exhausted, Howl thought. He carefully released himself from their pretzel position, got up and went to the bathroom. He prepared a bucket of hot soapy water, a cloth and a towel and brought them to the bedroom.  
“Hikkun?” he asked in a normal tone to see how deeply asleep Hiki was. He didn’t react at all, so Howl took the risk and started wiping him gently and carefully. He cleaned Hiki’s body thoroughly, and after he was done, he wrapped him in a big, warm blanket. He paused for a moment to watch his Hiki sleep. He had a peaceful look on his face. Howl smiled at him lovingly. Then he got up and took a shower. Afterwards he went to the kitchen to prepare a meal for Hiki, because he was sure his lover would be starving once he wakes up. He decided to cook Kitsune Udon, which was one of Hiki’s favorite foods.  
About an hour later, Hiki woke up. He was still tired, but it was still the middle of the day, so he should get up, he thought. He felt refreshed and clean. No traces of… Hiki blushed. Right. Him and Howl...did it. And it was awesome! Hiki’s heart skipped a beat. Howl must have cleaned him up afterwards, which made Hiki blush even more. But he felt loved and that was a typical thing for Howl to do.  
“Always taking care of me…” Hiki mumbled and smiled fondly.  
He got up to see where Howl was. He wanted to see him immediately, so he just wrapped the blanket around his naked body and headed to the living room. Suddenly he noticed a really delicious smell hovering in the air. His stomach reacted instantly with a loud growl.  
“Ah, Hikkun! You’re awake already.” Howl just came out of the kitchen, walked up to Hiki and kissed him.  
“You look like a spring roll all wrapped up in your blanket. But one with sweet filling.” He kissed Hiki again. “Hmmm yes, so sweet! Absolutely delicious!”  
Hiki giggled. “You’re so silly.”  
“How’s your body, Hikkun? Are you okay? Do your hips hurt? Or your bu-”  
“I’M OKAY!” Hiki interrupted him, his cheeks felt hot. “Really, I’m fine. What’s that smell? It smells like…”  
“Kitsune Udon. Go get dressed so we can eat.” Howl smiled.  
“You made Kitsune Udon? Yay! Alright, on my way!” Hiki sparkled and waddled away.  
Howl couldn’t help but giggle at that sight. My precious sweet spring roll, he thought.  
After they had finished their meal, they switched to the sofa and snuggled up in a big, cozy blanket together.  
“Do you want to watch a movie, Hikkun?” Howl asked.  
“Actually...I’d like to ask you for something.” He got up and turned around so he could look at Howl. “The other day...I told you about my past, right?...W-Would you...tell me about yours as well? I want to know more about you...If you don’t mind…”  
“Sure, Hikkun.” Howl smiled. “Of course I’ll tell you. Come back here…” Howl opened his arms, so Hiki leaned back again and snuggled against Howl.  
“I grew up here in Tokyo. As you know, my father was the owner of Harada Sweets. He had worked hard all his life to inherit the company one day. I always admired his fighting spirit. He was very kind and gentle. I only have good memories of him. When he was at home, he played with Sophie and me or told us crazy and exciting stories about his past…” Howl chuckled softly. “Our mother was the complete opposite. She was a very unhappy person. Nothing could satisfy her. My father worked hard, but it was never enough money for her. She once told us that she only married him because he knocked her up at a party, and that she didn’t want her life ‘to be like that’. She preferred going shopping or out with her friends over her motherly duties, so Sophie and I learned to take care of ourselves pretty early. When I was seven, I already knew how to cook simple dishes, because she was rarely there when we came home from school. But it was okay, because that taught us how to be independent. But when we were nine years old, our father suddenly died in his sleep of heart failure. Everything went downhill from there. Our mother, furious because our dad didn’t leave any money to her, took us back to her home country, England. He had left funds for Sophie and me, but we couldn’t get the money until we came of age and that made our mother even more angry. It was tough having to live in a different country all of a sudden, and we didn’t know any English. We had to learn the language fast. And on top of that, our mom got remarried to a Russian businessman three months later. And ten months after their marriage, our mother gave birth to twin girls, Anna and Diana. Unfortunately we’re not in touch anymore. That’s probably for the best, but I wonder how they’re doing. Anyhow, one day, when I was thirteen,… that man sexually harassed me, right before leaving for a business trip. He told me not to tell anyone or he’d hurt my sister, but I told my mother because I was scared that he would do the same to Sophie or Anna and Diana. But when I told her, she didn’t believe me. In fact, she slapped me and told me to stop lying.” Hiki was shocked. But he didn’t want to interrupt Howl, so he just snuggled closer against him, trying to comfort him like that. Howl acknowledged his gesture by placing both arms around him. He continued: “When he came back from his trip, my mother picked him up from the airport and confronted him in the car on their way back home. She called me when they were on the freeway and ordered me to repeat what I said. He denied it of course. They had a huge fight, I could hear them yelling through the phone. For her, it wasn’t about her son getting harmed. It was about him cheating on her.” Howl scoffed upon his mother’s idiocy. “Suddenly I could hear car breaks, screams, a crash and then there was nothing but silence. The police later said that she was driving too fast and the car slipped on the frozen road. They had both died immediately, because they didn’t wear seatbelts. It was a shock and I blamed myself for a while. ‘Sometimes bad things happen to bad people’, Sophie said. And then we had to move in with our aunt. She took us in for a few years, but as soon as we turned 18, we left England and came back to Tokyo. Sophie enrolled at T-Uni and I was lucky enough to find a job at a big IT company. I’m a self-taught computer scientist, I was into computers since I was a kid and my father always supported me in that. I didn’t have many references, but at my job interview I managed to impress my boss. When I arrived at the office, there was a big commotion. My future boss didn’t want to see me at first, because he was too busy, their system got infected with a very dangerous virus by a newbie. I told him that I could fix it and he actually let me try. Sure, he laughed at me at first and told me, that if all their IT specialists couldn’t fix it, how would someone like me even think about removing it successfully. It took me twenty minutes. I didn’t make many friends that day, including my boss. But envy is a sign of admiration, right? My boss hated that I saved his ass that day, but he still hired me. He said he would be an idiot not to, but it wasn’t a good working atmosphere, and I only got boring jobs any newbie could’ve done, just to keep me down. The only good thing about that job was that they offered dorms, so I had a place to stay. And I met Kinsley there. He was my boss’ assistant. He didn’t treat him very well either. Kinsley is amazing, our boss just didn’t see that. After three years, when I became 21, my father’s lawyer called me and Sophie and paid out the funds. I decided that I’ve had enough of that job and founded my own Company, KSHS. It was hard, I didn’t sleep or eat much at the beginning, but I made it. I made KSH2 successful. Kinsley was a huge help, though. I’m still more than grateful that he followed me when I asked him to back then. And then… I met you. And now I have more than I’ve ever dreamed of.” Howl kissed Hiki on the head. “You know, I didn’t found my company just to make money. I wanted to be independent and productive instead of being held down and do a useless, boring job. That’s why I don’t really care about money. If all of it would be gone one day, I wouldn’t mind it... as long as I still have you.” Hiki got up again and looked at Howl, his face was grave, his eyebrows narrowed. Howl got startled when he noticed Hiki’s teary eyes.  
“I love you, Howl. I’m sorry that you had to go through so much. I’m sorry that your mom was like that, and I’m sorry that your dad died. I’m so, so sorry for you and Sophie. And what your step father did to you… You’re so strong and you’re such a fighter...the things you achieved at such a young age, I really admire you.” He sniffled. Hiki didn’t really cry, but he couldn’t hold his tears back completely. Howl looked at him with his eyes wide open.  
“Look who’s talking…” he said and smiled. Hiki was confused, but he didn’t have the chance to think about Howl’s words much, because his lover grabbed him by his shoulders and pulled him close to embrace him. “I love you too, Hikkun. Thank you.”  
“Mh… you really shouldn’t thank me. As sorry as I am for the two of you, I’m also happy because you came back. I’m sorry.”  
Howl chuckled. “You’re way too adorable, Hikkun. It really is a crime,” he said and gladly accepted the flushed Hiki’s following scolding.  
They spent the rest of the evening cuddled up on the sofa, watching a Disney movie.  
When Hiki started feeling chilly for some reason, he decided to soak in the bath for a bit before they headed to bed.  
What an eventful day, Hiki thought as he drifted off, snuggled up against the love of his life.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did you find my little easter egg?
> 
> “Don’t be cruel,” he huffed, his hands still covering his face.  
> “I’m not cruel. Didn’t I treat you gently until now? But I want to hear you say it properly.”
> 
> Don't be cruel and Treat me gently are both english titles for the manga Hidoku Shinaide by Nekota Yonezou ^^
> 
> Thank you to Ioana and NQS!!!


	5. Taking care

 

  
Chapter 5 - Taking care

  
It had been a few weeks since Hiki and Howl had moved in together. Hiki felt at home right away and they quickly developed a little routine in their daily life. Every morning Hiki got up before Howl, made breakfast and a bento for his lover, they ate together and Howl left for work. Hiki always saw him off at the door and kissed him goodbye. His first semester at University hadn’t started, so he was home all day, but he was very busy nonetheless. He took care of the household and the cooking, he had to prepare for Uni, and because Hiki didn’t like having plain white walls everywhere, the two of them had decided to renovate the guest room and their office, so he also took care of the renovations. Howl had tried to convince him to hire a company for that, but Hiki stubbornly insisted on doing everything himself. In his opinion it was a waste of money since he was at home anyway. Howl was concerned that he might’ve underestimated the workload, but Hiki did a lot of research on how to put up wallpapers and such, and as it turned out he was actually quite skilled. When Howl saw how devoted Hiki was, he supported his lover and gave up on trying to convince him to hire someone.   
Unfortunately Howl had gotten very busy at work shortly after Hiki moved in. He had to work late every day, so they didn’t have much time to spend together, therefore Howl wasn’t able to help Hiki with the renovations as he would’ve liked to.   
One day Howl suddenly announced that he’d finally taken a weekend off. Hiki was ecstatic about those news. It had been quite some time since they had spent a day together, let alone a whole weekend. They made all kinds of plans of what they wanted to do. Dinner at a restaurant, movie at the cinema... but in the end they stayed home and didn’t even leave their bed. The only times they left the bedroom was to open the door for the delivery services that brought their meals, and for occasional bathroom breaks.   
To Howl’s surprise, Hiki, who was usually pretty shy and very even-tempered, wasn’t like that at all when it came to sex. Once he had gotten used to intimacy and physical contact, he became quite lewd. The scratch marks on Howl’s back were clear evidence of that. They both indulged in their passionate love over the entire weekend and completely forgot about everything else.   
  
On Monday morning Howl’s alarm woke him up. He turned around to Hiki, who was still snuggled up in his blanket. That was unusual, because normally Hiki was up before him. He must be still exhausted from everything I did to him, Howl thought and smiled slyly. He got up, took a shower and got dressed, but even by the time he was ready to leave for work, Hiki was still sound asleep. He was a bit worried by Hiki’s unusual behavior, but he had to go, so he decided to check up on him during his lunch break. It was really convenient to work in the same building they lived in. Howl whispered a “Goodbye my sweet Hiki…” and left.   
Around two hours later Hiki finally woke up. His body felt sore and he had a slight headache. He didn't feel like getting up, but he was thirsty, so he crawled out of the bed and slouched off to the kitchen to get a glass of water. He had felt queasy lately, but between the renovations, studying and his chores… and especially the past weekend… he didn’t really have time to pay much attention to it. The weekend… Hiki blushed up to his ears while daydreaming of all the things they had done. He couldn’t believe how voracious he had become. But it wasn’t only the act of sex he enjoyed, it was being with Howl. Being one with the man he loved so much it almost hurt made Hiki feel more alive then he had ever felt before.  
He sighed and smiled dreamily. Then he emptied his glass and got dressed, because he wanted to head out for some grocery shopping. But when he was about to put on his coat he suddenly froze. He realized that he had forgotten to make a bento for Howl!  
“Crap,” he cursed and rushed to the kitchen to see what was left in the fridge. Howl loved Hiki’s cooking and he always said that his lunch boxes helped him make it through the day until he saw him again. That’s why Hiki wanted to make one every single day. He did his best to work with what he had and finish it fast since it was almost noon. He made tamagoyaki, rice and used some of the leftovers from the food they had ordered in over the weekend in the box and decorated it neatly. That should do for today, he thought and frowned unsatisfied. He usually had time to put more effort (and fresh ingredients) into it. But he took the time and added a little note for Howl as always. “I’m waiting for you. Be safe and don’t work too hard. I miss you, Hikkun.” He added a little heart next to his name and smiled fondly.  
He put the note on the box and wrapped it in a dark blue Furoshiki. When he was done, he headed down to Howl’s office a few floors below their apartment. The silence in the elevator made him notice that his headache had gotten worse and his body was aching. He also felt a bit feverish. Dammit, he thought, I can’t get sick now. I have to pull myself together, this has to wait at least until the renovations are done, he ordered himself.   
He left the elevator and walked down the hallway of the big, open plan office. Howl’s employees seemed busier than usual, Hiki almost felt like in a beehive. That was probably due to the project that kept Howl so occupied lately. But even though they were all stressed out, everyone greeted Hiki politely. He had visited Howl there a lot in the past few months after they have met, so he had gotten familiar with his employees a little bit. Howl’s assistant Kinsley was sitting at his desk in front of the door of Howl’s personal office, focused on typing something on his computer. Hiki knew how important Kinsley was to Howl. That he was more than just an assistant. Kinsley was Howl’s best friend, and luckily him and Hiki got along great. He really liked and admired this diligent, hard working and kind man. And over the course of the past few months they had become something like friends as well.   
“Good morning, Kinsley-san! How are you today?” Hiki greeted the middle-aged man.   
“Oh, good morning Ueda-kun. I’m fine, how are you? What brings you here this early?”  
“I’m great, thank you,” Hiki lied. “I’m bringing Howl’s bento for lunch. Is he in there or is he out for an appointment?”  
“He’s here, Ueda-kun. But he’s in a phone conference with a client right now. It’ll take a moment, so if you don’t mind waiting…”  
“Ah, no it’s okay. Would you do me a favor and give this to him?” Hiki asked and handed the bento to him.  
“Sure.” Kinsley agreed as he took the bento and placed it on his desk.   
“Thank you, Kinsley-san. I'm on my way then, have a nice day!” Hiki smiled and turned around to leave, when he suddenly got dizzy and staggered. He tried to grasp onto something but there wasn’t anything, so he just slumped down on his knees.   
“Ueda-kun!” Kinsley jumped up and came to Hiki’s aid.   
“Ugh… I’m sorry. I got dizzy and my vision turned black for a second. I lost balance.” He said breathlessly.   
“Ueda-kun can you get up? Let me take you over to the waiting area, there’s no one there right now, you can lay down on the sofa for a moment.” Kinsley offered.   
“It’s fine, I’m okay.” Hiki got up, with Kinsley’s help, and needed to center himself for a moment. “How embarrassing, I’m sorry for the trouble, Kinsley-san. I’m going to leave. I didn’t have breakfast, that’s probably the reason. I’m going to stop at a Seven Eleven and eat something,” he smiled, trying to play it down.   
“Are you sure, Ueda-kun? Howl-san will be done soon, maybe you should-”  
“Ah, no no! Please don’t tell him anything about this. There’s no need, he will only worry too much and would probably want to watch over me for the rest of the day. But he needs to focus on his work right now.” Hiki gave him his defeating puppy eyes. Even Kinsley couldn’t withstand those.   
“Alright, alright. It would be bad if he’d be that distracted today, we’re going to meet with an important client later. But you’re going to tell him yourself later, promise me that.” Kinsley bargained.   
“O-Okay, I will do that.” Hiki agreed. He smiled at Kinsley, thanked him, bowed respectfully and left.

When he arrived back home he felt absolutely horrible. He was groggy, his body felt hot and sweaty, and he had started coughing. He had stopped at a Seven Eleven, but he wasn’t that hungry, so he only had a small snack. He carried six large bags stuffed with groceries and put them on the kitchen counter.   
“Jeez, that was heavy,” he huffed and coughed again. “Ugh…” All that coughing worsened his headache. He put the groceries away and started working off his chores. He wanted to have everything done by the time Howl came home, including dinner. As he was putting the laundry in the washing machine, Hiki’s phone started ringing.  
“Hey Howl! How’s your day?” Hiki asked, happy about his lover’s call.  
“Busier than I thought. I wanted to come home and check up on you during my lunch break, but I couldn’t make it. Are you okay? You slept like a log this morning.”  
“Oh yeah, sorry about that. I’m fine, I just got back from the store. I bought a lot, so how about Sukiyaki for dinner?” Hiki asked and coughed. “Kh...Sorry.”  
“Hikkun, are you sure you’re okay?” Howl asked worried.   
“I’m fine~ I think I swallowed a bug on my way to the store. Did you have enough time to eat your bento? Did you like it? There wasn’t much food left in the fridge, I hope it was okay…”  
“It was delicious as always, thank you for making it and bringing it to my office. But Hikkun, please don’t overdo it okay? Huh? What is it? Just a sec, Hikkun...”  
Hiki heard someone in the background who sounded like Kinsley.  
“Alright, I'm coming. Hikkun I’m sorry, but I have to go. I have to meet with an important investor. I’ll be home around seven.”   
“Okay, I’ll have dinner ready by then. Miss you!”   
“Miss you too, Hikkun.”   
Hiki smiled and they hung up. He took a deep breath and sighed. “Alright, let’s get busy!” he said to himself. On his chore list for that day was doing the laundry and the dishes, vacuuming and dusting… And he really needed to study. Hiki was an A grade student, but he had to work very hard for that. He had planned on finishing up painting the guest room, but because he had slept in, it was impossible to do that as well, so he postponed it to the next day. Taking care of such a huge apartment really was a challenge now that he felt like his body was shutting down more and more every minute. He was completely exhausted after he was done cleaning. His cough had gotten worse and made his throat hurt. He also felt hot and sweaty, but at the same time he was freezing. His body felt heavy and it was really hard to move. “Ugh…I’m so done...” he huffed weakly and slouched over to the sofa. He sat down and looked at the watch on his phone. It’s already six... Howl will be back in an hour, so I better start cooking soon. I can study after dinner, he thought, but when he tried to get up, he got dizzy and slumped back down. “Crap, what the heck...” he cursed. Ugh I’m so tired…, he thought and sighed. Alright, I’ll just rest for ten minutes. The preparations for the hot pot shouldn’t take that long after all. He lied down right were he was sitting and didn’t even have the strength to stretch out and grab a blanket that was placed just an arm length away. He didn’t care, he just wanted to sleep, and as soon as he was lying down he was out for good.

  
Some time later, on the other side of Tokyo, Howl and Kinsley were on their way back from their meeting. Kinsley was driving, so that Howl could do some paperwork on the backseat. He sighed loudly and rubbed his forehead agitated.  
“It's ten o'clock already, the meeting shouldn’t have taken this long. Some people are just a huge pain in the ass.”  
“It can’t be helped. They were difficult to deal with, but they’re important investors who will bring in a lot of money to our company. We had to stay.”  
“I know, that’s part of running a business. It’s just that...I’m really worried about Hiki. I tried to reach him on his phone to let him know that I’ll be home late, but he didn’t answer any of my calls.” He frowned.  
“Didn’t you say that he’s very busy with those renovations? Painting, putting up wallpapers and such? He’s also preparing for his first Semester at T-Uni, right? Maybe he was too absorbed in his studies...”  
“But usually he answers my calls no matter what. It feels like something wrong. Maybe he fell from a ladder and can’t reach his phone to call for help or something. And I think he’s pushing himself too much lately.”  
“Hmm… Now that I think of it, he did look pale this morning when he brought the bento. When he wanted to leave he got dizzy and-”  
“I knew it.” Howl interrupted him. “Why didn’t you tell me earlier, Kinsley? Okay, never mind. Today was an insanely busy day. But please do me a favor and just...drive faster.” Howl was so worried, he could barely stand it. He needed to get home and look after Hiki as soon as possible.  
  
When he arrived, he quickly took off his shoes and rushed inside.  
“Hikkun!?” He shouted as he walked into the living room. There he was. Lying on the sofa, showing no reaction to his calling.   
“HIKKUN!” He hurried over and knelt down next to him. “Hey, wake up! Hikaru!” But he still didn't move. He was sweaty and breathing heavily with a distressed expression on his face. Howl gently touched his face and caressed his cheek.   
“Damn it, you're burning up…” He carried him over to the bedroom and tucked him in. Then he took his phone and called Kinsley.  
“Kinsley! He’s really sick! I found him in the living room, he seems to be unconscious.” He explained hectically. “He’s really hot, I don’t know what to do!”   
“Calm down. I’ll send you the number of our family doctor. Call him. He normally doesn’t do house visits, but if you tell him that you’re friends with me he’ll be there right away. It’s better than taking him outside and all the way to a hospital at this hour and in his state. Don’t panic, he’ll be fine.” Kinsley tried to comfort his friend. He knew Howl for a long time and he had never seen him so distressed.  
“Alright. Thank you Kinsley. I’m sorry for troubling you so much.” Howl humbly replied.  
“It’s fine. Keep me posted, please. Oh, and stay home tomorrow. Don’t worry about the office, I’ll take care of everything.” Without waiting for a reply he hung up. Howl smiled fondly and only a moment later his phone buzzed. Kinsley had sent the contacts and Howl called Doctor Nomura right away. He arrived quickly and Howl lead him to the bedroom. The elderly man examined him, but even that didn’t wake him up. When the Doctor was done, he asked Howl to follow him outside, and they moved over to the living area.  
“Is he going to be okay, Doctor?” Howl immediately asked.   
“Seems like he caught a really bad virus. A flu virus,” Nomura answered. “His temperature is at 39.8 degrees. That’s very high, so I gave him an injection of Paracetamol to lower it. That will also reduce the pain a fever this high brings along. For now the Medicine should do, but if it gets this high again, or even higher, go to an emergency room immediately. You should get antibiotics, cooling pads if you don’t have any, and cough medicine first thing in the morning, I’ll make you a list. Also, please make sure that he will drink a lot when he wakes up, he needs to stay hydrated. Isotonic sports drinks would be good. And keep an eye on that cough if he had to deal with pneumonia in the past. If it gets worse and his chest starts hurting, call me. If a flu gets that bad it’s likely that the patient is fatigued. If that’s the case, please make sure that he will rest properly and takes it slow for the next couple of weeks.” The Doctor paused and looked at the expressionless, completely swamped Howl. He sighed. “I’m sorry, that was a lot. You’re probably unable to cope with this much information right now. I’m going to write down notes for you, along with the list of the medication and the prescription for the antibiotics. Don’t worry, he will be okay.” Nomura smiled and roughly patted Howl’s shoulder.   
Howl felt more at ease now. He had never been sick himself. Not as a kid, nor as an adult. Not that he remembered at least. He had no clue what to do, and seeing his usually lively Hiki like that made it even worse and harder to think rationally. But he trusted that man, because he knew that Kinsley trusted him.   
After the Doctor had left, Howl went back to the bedroom and sat down on the bed right next to Hiki. He looked pale, but his expression was more relaxed now, probably because of the Paracetamol. He softly caressed his cheek and held his hand.   
Howl still felt somehow lost. He thought about what the doctor had said about fatigue and indeed, everything had been very stressful for him in the past few weeks and months. His whole life had changed. Getting the approval of his father, renovating the condo, the move, adjusting to his new home, preparing for Uni… and then Howl was all over him on the weekend. No wonder he got sick, his immune system was probably completely down. “I should've paid more attention,” he whispered and sighed. Then he got up and went to the bathroom. He took a bowl, filled it with cold water and grabbed a cloth. He took it to the kitchen, opened the freezer and dumped two hands full of ice cubes in the water. He went back to the bedroom and put the bowl on Hiki’s night stand, dipped the cloth in the cold water, wrung it out and carefully placed it on his lover’s forehead, just as Doctor Nomura had told him.   
“Ngh…” Hiki twitched, but didn’t wake up. Howl repeated that procedure every time the cloth had warmed up. Around 3 a.m. Howl decided to rest for a bit. He had been up for almost 24 hours and Hiki’s temperature seemed stable. He lied down on the big, cozy sofa in the bedroom, so he wouldn’t disturb Hiki.   
Around three hours later Howl woke up from Hiki's coughing. He jumped up, turned on the lamp on his own night stand, so it wouldn’t be too bright for Hiki, and looked after him.   
“Hikkun? Are you awake,” he asked and caressed his lover’s sweaty face. Hiki slowly opened his eyes.   
“Mhh… Howl…? Where am I? What happened? Ugh my throat hurts...” he mumbled with a raspy voice.   
“You're in bed, you're very sick. You have a very high fever. I called a Doctor and he said you have a flu. How do you feel now? Let me take your temperature.”He got up and took the thermometer from the nightstand. “Turn around please.”  
“T-Turn...For what?” Hiki asked in a daze.   
“So that I can take your temperature, of course. I've read online that it’s most accurate if you take it from the rectum. I couldn’t do that before, because I didn’t want to wake you, so I took it from your armpit, but now that you’re awake…”  
Hiki stared at him in disbelief. He was too weak to yell at Howl, so he spoke as insistently as he could.   
“Howl. There is no way I’m going to let you do something like that, okay…? Absolutely not. No.”  
“What’s the problem? I’ve put other things in there before… Like those little vibrating-”  
“HOWL!” Hiki started coughing. He had raise his voice too much.   
“Okay, okay! I’m sorry. No taking your temperature from there, got it. Here, drink some water, quick,” he gave in. He took a glass of water from Hiki’s night stand and handed it to him. Hiki sat up with Howl’s help. He felt really dizzy and nauseous, but he endured it, took the glass and drank a few small sips from it.  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to upset you.” Howl felt bad for teasing him.   
“It’s okay. I know you mean well, but there are thermometers that take the temperature from the ear, maybe we should get one of those.” Hiki chuckled, took another sip and gave the glass back to Howl, who put it away.   
“I’m sorry, I’m really bad at this…” Howl pouted while helping Hiki to lie back down.   
“No, you’re great. Thank you for taking care of me.” Hiki smiled fondly as Howl tucked him in again. “I'm okay, it's not that bad. I’m just a bit sleepy.” He shivered and coughed again. He’s such a bad liar, Howl thought.  
“Oh no… I just remembered that I didn't prepare dinner last night… I'm sorry.” He coughed again. His throat was so sore, his head hurt a lot and he felt really weak and dizzy.   
“Idiot, who cares about that? I got really scared when I found you unconscious on the sofa, Hikkun. You should’ve said something earlier.” Howl scolded him gently.  
“What use would it have been to bother you with something like that. I’m not a kid, I can handle a little cold.”  
“Hikaru, I’m starting to get angry. I love you, you’re no bother to me! I want to be there for you, so please let me. And your ‘little cold’ turned into a full fledged flu in the end.” Howl’s voice sounded soft and not angry at all. Hiki smiled weakly. “Thank you, Howl. I love you so much, I promise to be better from now on, ” he whispered. Howl’s heart skipped a beat. Too cute, he thought.   
“I love you too, so next time tell me when you feel sick. And now go back to sleep, you need to rest. Your temperature is at 38.9 degrees. Still too high, but at least it’s lower than last night.” Howl put the thermometer away and took the bowl to refresh the water for the wet cloth for Hiki’s forehead. “Oh by the way, Hikkun!” He paused. “...are you still awake?”  
Hiki's eyes were closed, but he responded with a “Mmhh…” All of a sudden the little strength he had was gone and he drifted off to sleep.  
“Did you ever have pneumonia?”  
Hiki nodded softly, his eyes still closed. “I was sick very often when I was little…” he mumbled, his expression unconsciously hardened. “My mother hated it…”   
“... Alright, sleep now. I'll be right here if you need me.” Howl sat back down next to Hiki, took his hand and held it until he had fallen asleep.

Suddenly, Howl’s phone buzzed. It was a call from his assistant, so he picked it up.  
“How’s he doing?” Kinsley asked without wasting any time with greetings. Howl smiled. Apparently Kinsley had become very fond of Hiki.  
“He's hanging in there, but he had a fever of almost 40.” Howl left the bedroom so he wouldn't disturb Hiki and sat down on the sofa in the living room.   
“I'll have to go and get his meds soon. And I have to buy other things too, I don't have anything at home... not even a hot water bottle. I never get sick, so I didn’t need that kind of stuff until now…” He paused. “I've never seen him like this, Kinsley.”  
“Send me an exact list of what you need, I'll go and get it. You shouldn't leave his side while he's in this state.”  
Howl was grateful to have a friend like him, and he felt bad for causing him so much trouble, but he knew that Kinsley was right. “Thank you my friend. I'll text you the list right away.”  
“Alright. I'll be there in about an hour.”  
They hang up and an hour later, just as Kinsley had promised, the doorbell rang. He handed Howl four plastic bags filled with medicine, balms, herbal teas, sports drinks, three hot water bottles, cooling pads, a first aid kit, vitamin pills and more.   
“I also stopped at a konbini and bought some lemons and oranges, he’ll need Vitamin C. You can make fresh orange juice and you can squeeze the lemon juice in warm water with a little bit of sugar. Don't make it too hot though, or it will kill the vitamins. I’m heading down to the office now, let me know if you need anything.”   
“Thank you Kinsley. I would be lost without you.” Howl replied.  
“I know.” Kinsley smirked and left. Howl brought the shopping bags to the kitchen and emptied them. He arranged the meds he needed for Hiki now on the kitchen counter, the rest he put away into a cabinet that he decided was now their official medicine cabinet. He smiled proudly as he organized everything neatly. Suddenly he heard a rumbling sound coming from the bedroom.   
“Hikkun?!” He followed the noise. “What are you doing?!”  
Hiki was sitting on the floor next to the bed. “I need to go to the bathroom, but I got dizzy and tripped over the blanket. How embarrassing, I feel so stupid,” he answered while looking down ashamed.   
“Tsk. You should’ve just called me.” Howl scolded him while walking over. He knelt down and offered his hand to Hiki.   
“I only wanted to pee and the bathroom is like ten meters away…” Hiki frowned as he took Howl’s hand.  
“And now you know that you can’t make it by yourself. You need to rely on me more. Can you get up?”  
“Yeah.” Hiki took Howl’s hand, got up with his support and sat down on the corner of the bed. He looked so defeated, Howl’s heart throbbed. He sighed, leaned over Hiki, shoved one arm under his legs and held his back with the other.  
“Alright, up you go!” Howl announced and lifted Hiki up. Hiki reflexively clung onto Howl. He tried to protest, but instead he started coughing.  
“Shhh, don’t struggle. Think about your health. I’ll bring you to the bathroom and pick you up again. I’m your personal Taxi, no objections.” Howl said, kissed Hiki on the head and dropped him at the bathroom door. “Can you make it from here with no sneaky blanket in the way?” Howl chuckled. It was hardly noticeable on his feverish face, but Hiki blushed and nodded.   
Howl smiled and kissed him on the forehead. “Ouch, hot,” he joked and made Hiki giggle.  
When he was done in the bathroom, Howl did as he had promised and picked him up again. Hiki was so embarrassed, but he let him have his way. Howl took him back to bed and tucked him in. “Alright Hikkun, I’ll go and grab some cooling pads and your cough medicine. Are you hungry? You should eat something.”  
“I’m not hungry. I don’t really feel like eating. But have you eaten? I didn’t make dinner, nor breakfast...” Hiki replied worried.   
“I ate, don’t worry,” Howl lied. He had completely forgotten to eat since he was so focused on Hiki. “Alright, I’ll bring you something to drink. You need to stay hydrated.”   
He got up, went to the kitchen and came back a few minutes later, carrying a big tray. “Alright, here’s your cough medicine and antibiotics, a cup of camomile tea, a sports drink, a box of cooling pads and a special little treat.” He sat down on the bed, put the tray on the nightstand and handed Hiki his meds. He slowly got up and took it.  
“Oh, the cough syrup tastes so sweet! I didn’t expect it to taste that good.” Hiki noted relieved.  
“Make sure to drink your tea once it cooled down a bit. I used honey instead of sugar, I’ve read online that it’s good for your throat.”   
Hiki smiled. “You’re doing a lot of research...”  
“Of course! I need to know how to help you get better, right? Here.” He took the bottle with the sports drink and gave it to Hiki. “Drink.”  
He took the bottle and emptied more than half of it in one go. “Uwah, I didn’t realize how thirsty I was.”  
“How do you feel, Hikkun? You look a bit pale…”  
“I feel a bit dizzy and sleepy…and I’m cold.”  
“Lie back down then and rest.”  
Hiki nodded and snuggled up in his blanket while Howl prepared a cooling pad and patched it on his forehead. He felt exhausted even though he hadn’t done much.  
“Here’s your little treat. You love sweets and such, so I asked Kinsley to buy cookies.” Howl continued. “But they’re stamina cookies, so hopefully they will help you with your recovery.” Howl took a small white bowl that was standing on the tray and pulled it closer into Hiki’s direction, so they’d be easier for him to reach.   
“Thank you, that’s so sweet of you. You’re always so considerate... Ugh…I’m freezing,” he shivered.  
His fever had probably gone up again and Howl could tell that Hiki’s muscles were all tensed up. He was thinking of getting the hot water bottles, but then he changed his mind.   
He took off the sweater he was wearing over his shirt, as well as his jeans. Then he walked over to his side of the bed, slipped underneath the big blanket and scooted over to Hiki. He moved as close to him as possible and wrapped his arm around his waist.   
“Eh, Howl? What are you… don’t come this close, you’re going to catch my flu!” Hiki protested.  
“You know… another thing I’ve learned online was…” He spoke with a soft and low voice, directly into Hiki’s ear, which made him stop struggling immediately. “...that when a baby has a high fever, it helps if the mother and the baby cuddle skin on skin. That’s supposed to lower the baby's temperature down to the mother’s. You’re not a baby, I’m certainly not your mother and unfortunately we’re not naked, but maybe this will help your body calm down a bit. It’s worth a try, don’t you think?”  
Hiki nodded hesitantly and gave in.   
“Just focus on my warmth and on my heartbeat. Try to relax.” Howl whispered.   
Hiki closed his eyes and took a deep breath. After a few minutes he finally started warming up. Howl could feel how Hiki’s muscles got softer and his breathing got more steady. After a while the tenseness had left his body completely and he had fallen asleep. Since Howl hadn’t gotten much rest lately, he couldn’t withstand and drifted off to sleep as well.

On the third day, Hiki felt a little better. The fever was still high, he felt groggy and his head hurt, but his coughing had gotten better and he felt a little more energetic. Howl stayed by his side the whole time after Kinsley had assured him that it was okay to stay home one more day. He relied on him once again and continued taking care of his lover.   
“Good morning, Hikkun. How do you feel today?” he asked and caressed his cheek. “You don’t feel that hot anymore.”   
“A bit better, thanks to you.” he smiled. “What time is it?”  
“It’s almost 11.” He said as he sat down on the bed.  
“Ugh. Lazing around in bed all day, sleeping for that long… I’m so useless. And there’s still so much to do. Everything will pile up... And Uni starts soon, I need to prepare myself and study...”   
“You seem so restless since you moved in. Why do you think you’re useless? And laze around in bed all day? You’re sick! So sick that you’re bedridden actually. Your fever is still high, and the Doctor said that you have to take it slow for the next couple of weeks. So no renovations and I’ll help you with the household.”  
“B-But… Those are my duties. I want to be of use for you! I can’t just live off your wallet!”  
“Live off my... Hikkun, what on earth are you talking about?” Howl stared at him incredulously.  
“I know we agreed that I will take care of the household and the cooking as a compensation for not paying rent or anything since you own this apartment. So if I don’t attend to my duties, I can’t earn my place here! What right do I have to live here if I can’t be of any use? What if you get tired of me being a leech and tell me to scram?” Hiki froze. Did he really just say that out loud? Those things had been on his mind ever since he had agreed to move in with Howl, but he didn’t want to trouble him, so he never really talked about his fears. “Ah...I-I’m sorry for saying something like that!”   
“Hikkun...” Howl took his hand. “Listen to me closely. But even if you don’t, I’m gonna repeat myself a billion times if I have to. I love you more than anything. You’re my life. You don’t have to earn your place. Your place is in my heart and only I myself decide who I let in there. Got it? You’re my life partner, you don’t work for me. And this is your home too now! Also...even if you wanted to laze around in bed all day, that’s completely fine! It’s something people do from time to time.”  
Hiki knew that Howl loved him and wouldn’t kick him out just like that. He knew that his fears were irrational, but they were there and they were real, he couldn’t help it.   
“Did you get what I just said?” Howl asked and looked him deep in the eyes. Hiki nodded softly.  
“Sorry for being so overly dramatic,” he mumbled.  
“No need to apologize, Hikkun. You should sleep a little, you’re probably tired. Your temperature is still over 38 degrees.”  
Hiki nodded again and laid down. He actually felt very sleepy. Again, Howl stayed and held his hand. Hiki felt safe and secure and fell asleep with a smile on his face.

On the next day he felt much better. Howl had made rice porridge with cinnamon and apples for breakfast, and for the first time in days Hiki dug in.   
“Mmmhhh… Ipf fo goog,” he munched with a satisfied look on his face.   
“I’m happy to hear that. Good to see that your appetite is back. How do you feel?”  
“I feel better. My throat is still a little sore and my body feels heavy, but I feel much better over all.” He smiled. “You should go back to work, I kept you here long enough. I also feel so sorry for Kinsley, he’s working so hard.”   
“I will go back to the office once your fever is gone. Or...I mean...am I being a nuisance? Do you need space? I know I can be doting...”   
“No!! No, I'm happy and really grateful to have you by my side all the time. I feel spoiled. You know… when i was a kid, my mother didn’t really care about me. I got sick often, my immune system wasn’t the best. I remember how she even rolled her eyes when I told her that I felt sick. My nanny hated having to take care of that frail little boy too, so she only did the bare necessities. She brought me food and meds, but I was alone in my room the rest of the time. My siblings weren’t allowed to visit me either, because our mother was afraid they’d catch my illnesses. It really sucked. But… when I was ten and down with a really bad cold once again, Hajime snuck into my room. He placed something on my bed, grinned and ran out.” Hiki giggled when he remembered his little brother’s cheeky expression. “It was a walkie talkie. He had saved his allowance over three months to buy them so I wouldn’t feel lonely and had someone to talk to when I was stuck in my room. I was incredibly happy. And right now I'm just as happy, because having you, who's there for me and cares for me so deeply, is the best feeling in the world.” Hiki smiled at Howl.  
“I will always be there for you Hikkun,” he assured him and ruffled through his long hair. Howl’s chest felt tight after hearing all that. “Wow, you ate the whole bowl of rice porridge? Well done,” he praised Hiki and changed the topic.   
“You made it for me, right? Of course I'll eat all of it.”   
Howl smiled fondly. “Alright, time for your meds.” While Hiki took them, Howl went to the bathroom and grabbed that big bowl again. He filled it up with warm water, spilled some body soap in it, took a cloth and walked back to Hiki.   
“What are you doing,” he wondered.  
“I’m gonna wash you.” Howl answered bluntly.  
“Y-You’re going to do what?” Hiki asked startled.  
“Wash you. Hikkun, you’ve been lying in bed for days now and you were sweating like crazy. You’ll feel refreshed and much better once I scrubbed you squeaky clean.” He grinned.   
Hiki blushed instantly, and now that his fever had gone down and his face wasn’t as red anymore, it was clearly noticeable again, very much to Howl’s delight.   
“S-Squeaky...clean?” He repeated.   
Howl chuckled. “I’m just teasing you. But I’ll wipe you down with the cloth a little. You’ll feel better afterwards, trust me. I mean, you could also take a bath, but where’s the fun in that?”   
“Howl!!” Hiki protested, but in the end he let him have his way. “I only allow you to do this because you took care of me so much these days, get it?”  
“Got it.” Howl smirked and Hiki undressed his upper body. He threw his sweaty shirt on the floor and pushed down the blanket to his knees so it wouldn’t get wet. Howl sat down on the bed and wrung out the cloth. Then he started wiping Hiki’s right arm. He worked himself up to his shoulder, refreshed the cloth and continued on his neck. He wiped down his back, refreshed the cloth again and arrived at Hiki's chest. Howl swallowed heavily as he let the foamy cloth slide up and down Hiki’s pale and soft skin, grazing against Hiki’s erect nipples repeatedly. Hiki’s head felt as hot as it did when he had that high fever. “H...Howl…” he huffed. He almost felt ashamed for getting all hot and bothered while being washed, but looking at Howl, he clearly wasn’t the only one. Suddenly Howl leaned over and kissed Hiki tenderly. Their soft pecking soon turned into a deep kiss. Their tongues entwined and smacking sounds filled the room. “Your mouth is so hot…” Howl noticed and kept teasing Hiki’s nipple with the slippery cloth while their kissing became more passionate.   
“Ngh…ah...Howl…” The sensation of the terrycloth, slippery from the soap, teasing that sensitive spot, plus Howl’s amazing tongue technique were too much for Hiki in his weakened state. “NGH... AH!!” Hiki jolted and slumped down against Howl’s chest.   
“Hikkun...uhm…did you just cum…,” he asked surprised.   
“Shuddup! It’s your fault!” He huffed weakly, still leaning against his lover.   
“But we only kissed and I teased your nipple a little bit…were you that pent up?”  
“Waah, stop saying things like that!” Hiki blushed and pushed him away. “I’m still sick, that's why. And you probably caught my flu now! Tch! I'm gonna go to the bathroom, I need to change my pajamas.” He grumbled and tried to get up, but Howl stopped him.   
“Why leave? I have everything we need right here. I can scrub your-...”  
Hiki interrupted him by pressing one hand on his mouth and glared at him.  
“You wish!” He withdrew his hand, got up and headed towards the bathroom.   
“Wait, I can carry you,” Howl proposed teasingly. Hiki turned around and glared at him, stuck his tongue out and stomped into the bathroom. Howl chuckled. He loved to tease Hiki. He was just too cute when he got flustered and acted as if he didn’t like it.   
The rest of the day Hiki stayed in bed, since he was still recovering. Howl was in the living room, working on his laptop, but about every 30 minutes he went to the bedroom to look after Hiki. When he was awake, Howl took breaks to spend time with him. Hiki was happy and enjoyed it a lot, since they hadn’t seen each other much in the past few weeks. But Howl had told him that the project that kept them so busy was almost finished and he'd work more regular hours again soon.

When Howl woke up the next morning, the bed was empty.   
“Hikkun…?”   
He got up to look for him. Maybe he went to the bathroom and fell… or fainted… He jumped up and checked, but Hiki wasn't there. Suddenly he heard clattering sounds, so he followed them and ended up in the kitchen, where a pretty lively Hiki was preparing breakfast.   
“Hikkun? What the…”  
“Ah, Howl! Good morning!” Hiki walked up to him, gently grabbed the back of his head, pulled it down and kissed his astonished lover on the lips. “Did you sleep well? Good timing, take your seat, breakfast is ready,” he smiled.   
“Are you nuts? You're sick, you should be in bed!”  
“It's fine, my temperature is almost back to normal and I don’t feel like a walking dead anymore, hehe. You helped me so much, so I wanted to surprise you with a nice breakfast. We have sausages, scrambled eggs, toast...don't worry, I'll rest a bit later. As soon as you left for work, I'll go back to bed, promise,” Hiki added when he saw Howl’s worried expression.   
“Jeez...you're really one of a kind…” Howl chuckled and sat down at the table in front of the serving hatch. Hiki seemed to be back to his usual vivid self, which made Howl very happy.   
“Hikkun…I want to talk to you about something. I still have time before I have to head down to the office, so I want to address it now.” Howl started after they were done eating. Hiki became really nervous for some reason.   
“Wh-What is it…,” he asked hesitantly.   
“I wanted to wait with this until you’re better, I wanted to surprise you. Unfortunately it took a while to get it ready because I got so swamped with work, it was supposed to be a moving in gift…give me a second.” He got up and walked over to the coffee table in front of the sofa, where he worked on his laptop while Hiki was sick. He grabbed a bundle of papers and handed them over to his lover.   
“W-What is this,” Hiki asked and stared at him confused.  
“Just read.” Howl smiled.   
Hiki swallowed and started reading aloud: “Sugiyama Aiko… wait, isn’t that your lawyer?”  
“That’s correct. You’ve met her once when you were visiting me at the office. Keep reading.”   
“Dear Harada-san, I am pleased to inform you that your quitclaim deed has been successfully processed. You and Ueda Hikaru-san are now joint owners and his name has been added to the title of your property. As soon as Ueda-san has signed the contract, it will be legally bin...ding…” Hiki stopped reading and looked at Howl dumbfounded. “Howl, what’s the meaning of this?”  
“You now own half of this condo. It’s our home, not mine alone. I wanted to make it official,” he explained. He then placed a pen on the table in front of Hiki.  
“But it’s only going to be official after you signed it,” he smiled.  
Hiki was completely overwhelmed. “A-Are you serious? Th-This is…I mean...You don’t have to do this...“ Hiki stuttered. Then he took a deep breath and continued: “I’m sorry for being so insecure and for pushing you this far. And I’m sorry if I hurt your feelings with what I said about you kicking me out, because it probably sounded like I don’t trust you, which is definitely not the case. It’s just that… since I’ve met you my life has changed so much...for the better, of course. But I can barely comprehend all the wonderful things that happened since then. I went from being a loner who felt like he had no place in this world to being loved by such an amazing and caring person… I was so lucky to meet you, and I love you so so much...I don’t want to lose you...” All the things he had on his mind for so long, he finally had the courage to tell them to Howl.   
But Howl didn’t say anything. The silence probably only lasted for a minute, but to Hiki it felt like forever... Did his words make Howl realize that he actually was only a nuisance to him? Then, all of a sudden, Howl jumped up, grabbed Hiki by his arm, pulled him up from his seat and embraced him. He hugged Hiki as tight as he could without hurting him. Hiki was completely startled.  
“Howl, what-”  
“Hikkun, it’s okay to be scared and insecure. I know that all of this is new for you and everything happened so fast, I’m sorry. It’s my fault that you’re struggling, but you know, the reason I wanted you to move in so fast was because I can’t live without you anymore. It’s bad enough that it took so long to find you, I don’t want to waste any more time. It really would mean a lot to me if you sign the papers and legally become a co-owner of our home. Because what’s mine is yours. Including my heart.” Howl released him, took his face with both hands and kissed him tenderly. Tears were rolling down Hiki’s cheeks. “Dammit, I don’t want to cry,” he sniffled.   
“Hikkun, next time you feel anxious try to talk to me sooner, okay? You have to give me the chance to reassure you and to catch you when you're about to fall. I want to be able to be there for you and talking about your fears is the first step to fight them. Let's kick your fears’ ass together!” He winked, kissed him again and wiped away his tears.   
Hiki giggled and decided to sign the papers. Afterwards he hugged Howl tightly. “Thank you for being so understanding and patient with me,” he said in a muffled voice with his face pressed against Howl’s firm chest. Howl knew that Hiki's anxiety had its roots in his childhood, so he didn't take it personal. He just hoped that with a lot of patience and love, Hiki might lose those fears and insecurities someday.   
“Uwah, Howl! It’s almost 9, you’re gonna be late! Get dressed, I'll get your bento!” Hiki suddenly shouted, pushed him away and rushed to the kitchen. “What are you waiting for, hurry!” He ordered Howl, who chuckled, delighted by his lover’s returned briskness, and walked over to the door. He put on his shoes, took his coat and his briefcase and opened the door.   
“Wah, wait for me!” Hiki came running, slipped and almost crashed into Howl, but he was able to regain his balance.   
“Whoa, easy there Hikkun. Don’t worry, I wouldn’t leave without my good luck kiss,” he smiled.  
“Sorry, but it’s your first day back at work, I don’t want you to be late.” He blushed. They kissed goodbye and Hiki handed him two neatly wrapped bento boxes.   
“Here, one’s for you, the other one is for Kinsley. It’s a little thank you for working so hard while I kept you occupied. But I'll come down to the office later and invite him and his wife over for dinner this weekend. That’s the very least I can do.”  
Howl smiled lovingly, placed his hand on Hiki's chin, gently raised it up and kissed him softly on the lips.   
“You have such a good heart. I love you Hikkun, make sure to rest a lot. I'll miss you,” he said with a gentle voice.   
“I-I'll miss you too, Howl.” Hiki blushed.   
Howl left and both started counting the minutes until they saw each other again.

  
End of chapter.

 

 

 Pic created with RInmarugames Avatar creator

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to Ioana for her inspiracy and her quality checking for like ten thousand times!!!


	6. Fighting

 

Chapter 6 - Fighting

It was the first week of December.  
Hiki had finally started his first semester at University and it went pretty well so far. Most of his classes were very interesting and he liked his professors. He had also managed to find a job as a waiter at a cosplay café. Hiki had been there a couple of times, because it was close to Uni, and one day the owner walked up to him and asked him if he wanted to start working there.   
“You’re cute, our female customers would adore you,” was what he said. Hiki was really happy, because the wage was above average, they made his working hours fit his class schedule, and he liked his colleagues. After looking for a job for so long, it was almost too good to be true. But when he told Howl about it, he again tried to convince Hiki not to work part time and to focus on his studies instead. He had even offered to pay for his tuition fees. For Howl it wasn’t much money, but Hiki wanted to pay for his education himself. He wanted to work for his own money like everyone else. Howl was also worried that Hiki would overwork himself, but Hiki stuck by his decision, started working there and Howl gave up on trying to convince him.

Seven months had passed since the day they met and they enjoyed every second of their life together. Their weeks were very busy, but they made sure to always end the day together. Whether with cuddling on the sofa while watching a movie before going to sleep, or spooning in bed talking about their days until they fell asleep, or...with more than just cuddling and spooning...  
“Hikkun, your face is red. Did you catch a cold again?” Howl’s question suddenly pulled him out of his thoughts.   
“N-No, I’m fine!” He cleared his throat. They had just finished dinner and Hiki was washing the dishes while Howl cleared the table.   
“Hey, why do you never use the dishwasher? I bought it to make things easier for you, but maybe we should just get rid of it if you don’t use it anyway...” Howl asked. Hiki sensed an irritated undertone, which was very unusual for Howl.   
“It’s faster to do it like this...and more economical.” Hiki smiled. “Sorry Howl, I honestly appreciate your thoughtfulness.”   
“Hmh. You might be faster than the dishwasher, but…” Howl positioned himself behind Hiki, his hands slid around his lover’s slender waist and grabbed it tight. His chin was resting on Hiki’s shoulder. “...this is time we can’t spend together,” he said with a silent voice.   
“But we are together right now…”  
“No, I mean...together together.” He pulled Hiki’s hips closer and started kissing his nape.  
“Ngh… Howl…”  
Howl’s hand moved downwards and into Hiki’s pants. Hiki jolted as he started groping his crotch while sucking and nibbling on his neck.   
“Stop it, you’ll leave marks… Howl~ I can’t today, I’m really tired…… and I’m working a double shift tomorrow... OW…! Don’t bite, what the-”  
Howl released Hiki from his grip, walked over to the table and sat down pouting.   
“Tsk. I know that you’re tired! You’re working too much, you should just quit that damn job. You don’t need it, you have me.”   
“This again? I thought we talked it out already. I really like my job and I want to make my own money. I don’t want you to pay for everything just because you technically can. It’s my life and I have my own responsibilities. Even my father accepted when I declined his offer to pay for my University fees, so why can’t you?”   
Howl turned his head and looked at Hiki. He was standing there with that serious expression on his face while wearing oversized pink rubber gloves covered in bubbles from the dish liquid, holding a blue, cloud shaped sponge. He was just too cute. Howl smirked, walked over to him and kissed him on the forehead.   
“I’m sorry Hikkun. Please don’t be mad at me. I just don’t like to see you tired all the time. Hmm… How about you work for me?”  
“I’m not mad at you. But what are you saying? Work for you? In what position?” Hiki asked astonished.   
“Go to the bedroom, undress and we’ll find out which position suits you best.” Howl winked and grinned teasingly. It took a moment for Hiki to realize what his lover was implying.  
“Idiot!” He chuckled. “You don’t have to pay me for that,” he blushed.  
“Hey, since tips aren’t common here in Japan, but normal in the UK, why won’t you let me take care of your tip now…? And I’m not talking about money here.” Howl smirked.  
Hiki laughed. “You’re crazy and perverted! Dammit...now I’m in the mood too... You better treat me to my favorite Ramen for dinner tomorrow after you pick me up from work!” Hiki pretended to be angry. He took off the gloves, grabbed Howl’s hand, pulled him along and they vanished into their bedroom.   
Howl and Hiki never really fought. Even if there was a disagreement between them, they always talked it out peacefully. Only when it came to Hiki’s job Howl seemed unreasonably irritated. But still, they always settled their arguments peacefully… except for that one time…

When Howl had picked up Hiki from the café for the first time after he had started working there, he had met his boss and immediately decided that he didn’t like him. He called him ‘very peculiar’ and ‘way too friendly’, but Hiki had no idea what he meant by that. How could someone be too friendly? He didn’t give it too much thought though, since Howl tended to get jealous easily anyway. Hiki had gotten used to that and he thought it was cute when Howl acted a bit childish and spoiled. He knew that it wasn’t because he didn’t trust him, and it wasn’t in an excessive way, so it was fine.   
But then, one day, something unexpected happened. Hiki’s boss decided to hold a maid themed week once a month, and all the male waiters had to wear maid dresses too. Hiki was okay with that, he was open to new things and it was funny to see his ikemen, muscular colleague dressed like that. They had a blast during the costume fitting. But the skirts for the boys were much shorter than the girl’s skirts. “It’s called fan service and it has a comedic effect,” he justified it. It made Hiki feel uncomfortable, but he just went along with it. Because everyone agreed to it and he didn’t want to stand out negatively. As the new guy, he didn't want to cause trouble. That was also the reason he didn’t tell Howl about it. He hated that Hiki was working there already, that would probably be the last straw… And Howl was pretty stressed from work recently, Hiki didn’t want to add to his stress level. It’s only one week a month, it’s fine, no biggie, he had told himself.   
In the premiere week the cafè was full of people. Their maid week had been very well received and everyone had wanted to take pictures with the staff and have a good laugh. It was super stressful, but also a lot of fun. On Friday, the next-to-last day of their first maid week, after a long day at Uni, Hiki was tired and a little clumsy. He spilled a large milkshake and dirtied his outfit. His boss was fuming, because every employee only had one costume and Hiki needed it on the next day. It was a Saturday and the busiest day, even in regular weeks. There was no chance that a laundry service would have it cleaned that fast since it was already late, but Hiki explained that they had a washing machine and a dryer at home, and offered to clean the dress until the next day. His boss agreed and Hiki was very relieved that the situation had been solved and that he didn’t get fired.   
It was 8:30 p.m. when he arrived home. Luckily his workplace wasn’t far from there. This time Howl hadn’t picked him up, because he had to meet with a client. Since Howl would eat out, Hiki didn’t feel the need to cook and just got some instant noodles and a strawberry cream cheese sandwich from the 7/11 around the corner on his way home. He stuffed the dress into the washing machine, poured hot water over the noodles, put his sandwich on a plate and made himself comfortable in the living room to watch some anime while eating, and to study a bit afterwards. There were exams coming up in January, so Hiki needed to work hard to keep his excellent grades.   
When the washing machine was done, he put the dress into the dryer and thirty minutes later his costume looked like new. While ironing it, he noticed that it had gotten pretty late. It was 11 p.m. already and Howl still wasn’t back. Hiki was very tired, but he didn’t want to go to bed without him, so he decided to stay up and wait. He only needed to finish ironing the apron, then he would go back to his studies until Howl arrived. That was Hiki’s plan, but suddenly the apartment door opened.   
“I’m home,” a tired looking Howl announced as he entered the apartment, with his shoulders slumped down.  
“Ah, welcome home, Howl! How was your day?” Hiki quickly walked up to him, kissed him and took his coat and his briefcase to put them away. “Do you need anything? You have eaten, right?”  
“Yeah. I don’t need anything, thanks.” Howl replied while loosening his tie on his way to the living room, followed by Hiki.  
“But you look like you could use a big cup of my special hot chocolate with cinnamon, whipped cream and rainbow sprinkles. That always makes you feel better,” Hiki smiled brightly, trying to comfort his exhausted lover, who slumped down on the sofa.   
“No thank you, Hikkun. All I want to do is sleep. That client was quite a handful...and he made me drink a lot of wine...”   
“Oh no… you always get a really bad headache from it... I’ll get you some aspirin,” Hiki said, and started walking over to the kitchen to get the pills from their meds stash, but Howl stopped him midway.  
“It’s fine! I’m just gonna sleep it off. I’ll head to bed in a minute.”  
That was the first time Hiki had seen Howl in such a bad mood. He wanted to make him feel better, but he didn’t know how.   
“Howl..., did it not go well with that client? You seem agitated...” Hiki regretted asking that immediately. ‘That won’t make him feel better, idiot!’ He scolded himself internally.  
“No, it didn’t go well at all, he’s trying to play games. There seems to be another company involved and he’s negotiating with both of us. But he’s a big fish who would benefit the company a lot, so we have to win him over. I need him to sign those contracts. What a pain…” Howl irritatedly massaged his forehead with his fingertips.   
“I’m sorry to hear that, Howl. But you’re great at what you do, and KSH2 has an excellent reputation, right? I’m sure you’ll get him to sign.” Hiki tried to reassure him, but Howl didn’t answer. He just silently sat there with his eyes closed and a distressed expression on his face, rubbing his forehead. Hiki was standing next to the sofa, looking at him, trying to think of something to say that would make him feel better.  
“Hmh. I guess I’ll take a quick shower and head to bed.” Howl suddenly broke the silence. When he looked up, he noticed the dress hanging on the ironing board.   
“...Hikkun, what is that?”  
“Tha-...Oh, umm... I was ironing just now.” Hiki fidgeted.  
“I can see that, but why are you ironing a sexy maid outfit?” Howl was staring at Hiki in a way that made him feel uncomfortable.   
“S-Sexy…? It’s for work, we have a maid week once a month now, and Inohara-san thought it would be funny if the boys would wear those dresses too,” he answered nervously under Howl’s glare.  
“I knew it. I knew that guy’s a damn pervert. I want you to quit. You’re going to quit first thing in the morning. No discussion, you do what I say.” Howl ordered with a firm voice. Hiki was startled. He had no idea how to react to his lover’s unusually harsh words.   
“I’ll take your silence as a yes. It’s settled, let’s go to bed.”  
“W-Why are you like that all of a sudden? I mean...I know you’re tired and drunk and have a headache, and that you’re agitated because of that client, but...don’t take that out on me! And don’t order me around, you’re not my father,” Hiki yelled.  
“I’m your partner, we live together and share our lives, so shouldn’t I get to have a saying in this? I told you that I want you to quit. I don’t want you to work for him anymore, period. He probably gave you such a short dress so he can stare at your ass all day. And apparently, you’re fine with that! But I won’t allow it! You’re gonna quit tomorrow, that’s my final word! Let’s go to bed now!” Howl got up from the sofa and grabbed Hiki’s wrist to drag him along to the bedroom.   
“Let go of me, we’re not done talking!” Hiki struggled.  
“We are done.” Howl replied and tightened his grip.  
“Ow! Let go!” Hiki stopped walking and managed to free his hand. “Y-You know what!? Y-You’re really... a mean jerk!! You don’t act like yourself and I don’t like the person that’s standing in front of me! I’m gonna sleep in the guest room today, I don’t want to see your face right now,” he yelled and dashed away to the guest room. He slammed the door behind him, crawled into the bed and holed up underneath the big blanket. Hiki felt like crying. What the heck had just happened? He was so confused. What the hell had gotten into Howl… “Why did he say those things?” Hiki mumbled. He covered his face with his hands and eventually started crying. His chest hurt, and in that moment he felt the loneliest he had ever felt in his entire life.   
At one point, he didn’t know how long he had been crying already, he drifted off to sleep, completely exhausted.

  
“Hikkun…?” Howl slowly opened the door. “Are you still awake?”  
He didn’t get an answer, so he just slowly walked inside. The room was dark, so he turned on the small lamp on the nightstand. There was a Hiki-sized blanket bundle on the middle of the bed and he sat down next to it.   
“Jeez, can you even breathe…?” He mumbled and pulled down the blanket a little so he was able to see Hiki’s face. He was still sound asleep. The sheets had wet stains, his eyes were swollen and the skin around them was red and irritated. Howl’s heart throbbed. “I made you cry so much, dammit…” he whispered. “Hikkun…” He gently touched Hiki’s face and caressed his hair to wake him up.   
“Mnhh…” Hiki opened his eyes. “Howl? What do you want? Leave me alone.” He sniffled, grabbed the blanket and covered his face again.   
“Hikkun, I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have acted like that. I really am a mean jerk. I’m actually far worse than that.”  
“You’re actually not! That’s why I don't get it...” Hiki muffled from underneath the blanket. “And that’s why your words hurt so much.”   
Again, Howl’s heart throbbed. “Please come out, Hikkun. I know you don’t want to see my face right now, but please let me apologize properly. Afterwards I’ll leave you alone, promise.”   
After a few moments of silence Hiki uncovered his upper body and sat up. He looked at him and Howl noticed how bloodshot Hiki’s eyes were.   
“Thank you, Hikkun. What I wanted to say is… this is not supposed to be an excuse, but it was probably the combination of immense stress, fatigue and too much wine that drove me to this... I should’ve controlled myself better. It was unfair and mean to take it out on you. I’m really deeply sorry, Hikkun. You’re my everything. I hate myself for treating you like that more than you ever could. I really hope I didn’t destroy what we had… I hope you don’t hate me now.”  
“What are you talking about, idiot? I could never hate you! That’s impossible! But for you to snap like that… it came out of nowhere. I wasn’t really angry, I was more hurt and confused, because that’s so unlike you.” He sniffled. “And I take my job seriously. I don’t just walk around showing people my butt.”   
“Ah, about that… Jeez, I’m so sorry for saying that. You don’t deserve to be treated like that. You’re completely in the right here. I should respect what you want. And I actually do, it’s just… knowing that others see you in those kind of clothes… I don’t like it. And I never will. I hate the mere thought of it. I can’t tell you that I will approve of something like that dress, that would be a lie. But I will respect your decisions. It can’t be helped, it’s part of your job, so I will stop behaving like a big baby and accept that. Still all of this is not an excuse for my horrible behaviour. I’m sorry.” He took Hiki’s hand and kissed it softly. “I’m really, really sorry.”  
“Howl…”   
“But please, be aware of the shortness of your dress and try to avoid certain movements. Don’t… bend over and such. You’re not used to wearing a dress after all...”  
Hiki smiled. “I’ll try my best. Thank you Howl.”  
“And in the future, please tell me about stuff like this so we can talk about it, okay?”  
Hiki nodded. “I will. I’m sorry that you found out about it by chance.”   
Howl leaned over and kissed Hiki’s forehead.   
“I love you. And again, I’m deeply sorry,” he whispered.  
“I love you too.” Hiki smiled. “And of course I’ll forgive you. But next time you’ll behave like that, I’ll kick your butt, okay?”  
“That won’t happen again, don’t worry. I will never ever treat you like that again, I promise.”  
Hiki smiled broadly and leaped forward right into Howl’s arms. They embraced tightly and that crushing feeling of loneliness had left his body.   
“Want to move back to our bedroom? It feels so lonely and cold in there without you, I can’t stand it.” Howl whispered.  
Hiki smiled and nodded. They got up, Howl took his hand, their fingers entwined and they changed rooms.   
“You know what, Hikkun?” Howl said as they were walking over. “I’m also kind of jealous. I bet you look super hot in that dress, I would like to see you wearing it too.” Howl grinned.   
“Pervert!!!” Hiki gasped. “Let me go, I’m moving out,” he protested jokingly.   
“Never! I’ll never let you go, you’re mine, and mine alone!”   
Howl turned around, cupped Hiki’s face with his hand and kissed him passionately.   
“Mhh...I think I’m fine with that…” Hiki grinned.

A couple of days later Howl picked up Hiki from work.  
“Great news!” Hiki shouted in high spirits as he jumped into the car. He grinned at Howl, leaned over and kissed him enthusiastically.   
“Oi Hikkun, easy there. What’s going on?” Howl asked startled.   
“It took me a while to convince him, but today my boss gave in. I told him that I don’t feel comfortable wearing such a short dress. I didn’t like it from the start, but I was too scared of causing too much trouble as a newbie to veto on it. But after what happened, I gathered the courage to speak up! And now I’m allowed to wear spandex shorts underneath my dress!” Hiki sparkled proudly. Howl stared at him for a moment, comprehending what his lover was so excited about. He would still wear that dress, but with shorts… Howl bursted out in laughter. Hiki was just too cute.   
“Hey, why are you laughing? It took me a lot of effort to convince him, you know?” He sulked.  
“I’m sorry Hikkun. I’m really proud of you. And I’ll feel a little bit better knowing that no one will be able to see your undies.” Howl smiled and kissed him.   
“I was hoping for you to say that!” Hiki switched from sulking to sparkling again.  
“Let’s go home. I picked up something to eat already. I want to spend the rest of the day snuggled up with you on the sofa. I also got that new movie you wanted to watch. And later on, we can celebrate your good news and mine as well.” Howl softly ruffled through Hiki’s long hair and started the car.   
“Your good news?”   
“I got the deal. That client that caused me so many troubles finally decided to sign our contracts.” He smiled triumphant.   
“Yay! I’m so happy, that's awesome Howl! Congratulations!” Hiki shouted.   
“Thanks Hikkun. I’m happy too.” He smiled and they headed home.

 

  
  


 

  



	7. Merry Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> NSFW CONTENT! ;P

Chapter 7 - Merry Christmas

Hiki was extremely excited because it was only one week until Christmas, and not only was it their first Christmas together, Howl had also announced that his sister Sophie was going to visit them.  
“Normally we spend the holidays together, but she said she can’t take off from work this year so she’ll stay from the 26th to the 28th,” was what he said. But Howl assumed that it was probably a lie because she wanted to give us some space to spend our first Christmas together.  
Sophie sounded like a really great person, Howl talked about her a lot. Hiki couldn't wait to finally meet her, but at the same time, he was very nervous, because… what if Sophie didn't like him? Howl had told her everything about them and said that Sophie was happy for him and approved of their relationship. They had her blessing. But she was Howl’s most important person, so what would happen if she was against them being a couple after all? Hiki's upcoming anxiety attack was interrupted by his ringing phone.  
“Y-Yes?” He answered it.  
“Hikkun, where are you right now? I'm done with my appointment, let's have lunch together.” Hiki was happy to hear Howl's voice and all the negativity suddenly fell off of him.  
“Uhm… errr…” he panicked, Howl’s invitation was unexpected.  
“Hikkun? Is everything okay?”  
”Yeah, sorry! I-I'm at the mall, I have to return something I bought the other day. I'll be done in about, ummm… half an hour,” he lied. The truth was that he had just bought Howl's Christmas present. Hiki was in a pinch because it was too big to hide it from him in his pockets, so he quickly decided to store it in one of the lockers at the mall. Problem solved, he thought.  
“Alright, let's meet at that burger place at the food court in half an hour then.”  
“Okay.” Hiki smiled and they hung up. He was very happy about that sudden invitation. He didn't expect to see his lover until the evening, even though it was a Saturday. It sucked when Howl had to work on weekends since it was the only time when they could spend all day together. But it couldn't be helped, Hiki understood that. And Howl usually made up for it in… certain ways. Hiki blushed, shook his head and rushed over to the lockers to store Howl’s present and headed down to the food court. He waited in front of the burger restaurant, and it didn't take long until Howl arrived.  
“Hikkun! Sorry for making you wait, there was traffic,” he huffed.  
“It's okay, I just arrived a few minutes ago. How was your meeting?”  
“Everything went well. We negotiated over a long-term contract, and it’s ours,” Howl smiled proudly.  
“That's great! Let's celebr-” Hiki got interrupted by loud screaming. A little girl in a princess costume was standing in the middle of the cramped food court, crying desperately. Several people had gathered and were trying to soothe her, but every time someone approached her, she started crying even more.  
“Oh no, she probably lost her mom,” Hiki said and walked over to her.  
“Hikkun, wait! What are you doing?” Howl asked as he followed him.  
“I want to help,” was his answer. Howl smiled.  
“Of course you do.” That was just like him, Howl thought.  
Hiki had reached the little girl that was about the same age as his niece and knelt down next to her.  
“Hey there, I'm Hikaru,” he said with a calm but cheerful voice. “Your dress is super pretty, you look like a princess! Are you a real princess?” He smiled at her.  
The little girl got distracted and stopped screaming. “Y-Yesh, I'm a weal pwincess,” she sobbed.  
“Ehhh, I knew it! It's an honor to meet you, princess… Uhm… What's your name, your highness?”  
“M-M-Megumi…”  
“Princess Megumi, it’s an honor to meet you.” Hiki bowed his head. “But why are you crying? Did you lose your mother, the queen?”  
Megumi nodded, her eyes still filled with tears, but she had stopped sobbing.  
“Hmmm… I know someone who can help us to find her. See that man over there, with the golden hair?” Hiki brought his mouth to her ear and whispered: “That’s the great knight Howl. He will protect you and help us find the queen. So let's ask him to help us, okay?”  
Megumi lit up and her eyes widened. “O-Okay!” She nodded enthusiastically.  
“Okay, up you go.” Hiki lifted her up and they walked over to Howl.  
“Great knight Howl, would you be so kind to help us find the queen?” Hiki asked formally and winked at the dumbfounded Howl.  
“P-Pwease!” Megumi spurted out excited and looked at him with big eyes.  
“How could I say no to a beautiful princess like you, milady. Of course I will help you.” Howl bowed. Megumi sparkled and they walked over to an Info point, to call out for her mom, who came running a few minutes later. Apparently, Megumi had snuck away after her mom told her that she can’t have ice cream because of her stomach ache in the morning. So Megumi stubbornly decided to get the ice cream on her own, managed to get two levels down to the food court, but got scared when she realized what she had done and started wailing.  
“Thank you so much for your help,” her mother, close to tears, said to Howl. “I was so scared that someone might have kidnapped her. Thank you for rescuing her.”  
“Your daughter was lucky that this guy was around. He’s the hero here.” Howl smiled and pointed at his lover. Hiki blushed flustered and quickly knelt down to Megumi.  
“It was a pleasure to meet you, princess Megumi.” Hiki bowed deeply.  
“T-Tank you for saving me, Hiki-chan and the gweat knight Howl.” Megumi sparkled, and she left with her mother.  
“Now that was an adventure,” Hiki giggled.  
Suddenly Howl leaned over and kissed him.  
“Howl! We’re in public, what do you think you’re doing?!” Hiki whispered frantically.  
“I'm proud of you and I wanted to express that. I don't care what others think, they're just strangers anyway. Let's go have lunch now.” he smiled.  
“Jeez.” Hiki blushed. “Alright, let's go. I'm starving.” he returned Howl's smile and they headed back to the restaurant. During their meal, Hiki looked troubled, so Howl asked if he was okay.  
“Yeah... It’s just… Aren’t you scared to be seen by people who know you when you do stuff like that in public? I mean… what if a client saw you kissing me? Wouldn’t that cause a lot of trouble if they found out?” Hiki asked.  
“I’m not ashamed of who I love. There’s nothing wrong with it, so there’s no reason to hide it. Did you forget what I told your father back then? I don't want to do business with people who think they have the right to judge me. Even if I would lose all my clients, I don't care as long as I have you.” Howl answered firmly. Hiki looked into his sturdy eyes. Howl’s strong will and his determination were something he deeply admired. It was the same look he had when they had spoken to his father, Hiki remembered. He smiled fondly and nodded. “You’re right. And even if you'd be without any clients, and therefore without a job, I would still work at the Cos Café, so I could take care of you.” He took a big bite from his burger and smiled self-confidentially.  
“That's true. I would be in your care.” Howl smiled. Howl still had his side projects, like real estates, but he didn't want to bring that up. Hiki was just too cute. But suddenly a thought crossed his mind.  
“Hikkun, say…”  
“Hm?” Hiki looked at Howl with his stuffed cheeks. “Waf iw if?” He swallowed.  
“Shouldn’t you swallow first and talk then?”  
“Ah…, sorry.” He blushed and made Howl chuckle. Sometimes his lover was still like a kid. Howl loved Hiki's childish side.  
“It's fine. Hikkun,... have you ever thought about having kids?” He asked straightforward. Hiki looked at him dumbfounded.  
“What? K-Kids? Why are you asking me that all of a sudden?”  
“Well, seeing you with Megumi made me think. If you're with me, you will never have kids. You seem to be great with them, so won't it make you sad to miss out on that?”  
“Hmm… I never thought about that. We're both men, so it's impossible for us to have kids of our own, but we could still adopt…” he pondered.  
“No, I don't want that. I don't want kids, never did. And I don't want to share you with anyone.” Howl knew how selfish he was by saying that, but he wanted to be honest. Hiki put his burger down and leaned back.  
“Well… kids are great, I get along with them very well, but… I don't need to have them to be happy. I love my life the way it is now. You’ve become an essential part of me and there’s no way I would give you up. As long as I have you I don’t need anything else... Except for food,” he grinned and took another big bite from his delicious burger. Howl smiled lovingly, but suddenly Hiki’s expression darkened. “Bub whap aboub Fofie...” Hiki munched. Howl decided to give up on telling Hiki not to speak with his mouth full and accepted it as a bad habit.  
Hiki realized, swallowed and continued with a flushed face. “What if Sophie wants to be an aunt and dislikes me for taking that away from her...”  
“Now where the heck does that come from?” Howl asked so loud that a few customers turned their heads and looked at them.  
“Howl… you’re being too loud.”  
“Well apparently you didn’t hear me, so I have to raise my voice, right? I don’t want kids. Never did. Sophie knows that and she respects it. If she wants to have kids in her life, she can make them herself. Get it?”  
“Got it.” Hiki nodded. Howl noticed his troubled expression and added:  
“And there’s no way on Earth she won’t like you, Hikkun. I told her everything about you and she’s very excited to finally meet you. It doesn’t matter to her if you’re a man or a woman. She would never be against something or someone that makes me this happy, you know?” Howl smiled at him fondly and took his hand. “You two are going to get along great, I know it. So please don’t worry, okay?”  
“Nh. Okay.” Hiki blushed. He felt so stupid. Sophie was Howl’s twin. If she was only a little bit like him, there was no doubt that they would get along...  
“Hikkun, are you done eating?”  
“Hm? Yeah, I guess. Why?”  
“I would like to go home and have dessert.” Howl winked and grinned maliciously. It took Hiki a moment before he realized what Howl was insinuating.  
“Eh… B-But it’s only early afternoon…” he stuttered flustered.  
Howl leaned on the table, looked deep into his eyes and whispered: “I’ll make you forget about time soon, so let’s go.”  
“Ngh…” He blushed even deeper and nodded. They got up, Howl paid their bill and they rushed home for “dessert”.

A week later it was finally Christmas. He was on Winter vacation and had also taken off from work for two weeks. It wasn’t easy, but a colleague of his suddenly jumped in because she needed the extra money. Hiki was really grateful because that meant he could spend Christmas and New Year’s at home with Howl. His lover still had to go to work, but Hiki was home when he left in the morning, went downstairs to his office to have lunch with him, and he was home when Howl came back in the evening. Hiki enjoyed his vacation, but there was no time to laze around. Hiki had been busy in the kitchen for four days straight. He baked cookies, made mochi and candied fruits for little gift boxes he prepared for Howl’s employees. Howl had told him that there was no need since they got Christmas bonuses, but Hiki insisted on giving them something since they all were very kind to him whenever he visited Howl.  
The 24th was on a Wednesday. Hiki got up at 5 in the morning to prepare the last few boxes. Howl had 63 employees and for those with kids, he put a little bit extra in it. It really was a lot of work but he managed to get everything ready. He put Howl’s bento on the table, added a little note with apologies that he wasn’t there, and brought the gift boxes down to the office before anyone had arrived. He placed them on the desks, sighed deeply, smiled and headed to the mall to pick up Howl’s gift from the locker. Afterwards, he did some last grocery errands and went back home to prepare dinner for their Christmas meal in the evening.  
He immediately started cooking as he got back home and around 5:30 pm he decided to take a quick shower and finish up afterwards.  
In the center of their huge living room, they had placed a big Christmas tree, decorated in blue and silver ornaments. Everything was neatly decorated, Hiki had put a lot of effort into it. Christmas had become more common in Japan, but back home they never celebrated it. But since Howl had western roots and had always celebrated Christmas because of his mother, he thought he’d take the chance to indulge into those festive feelings. They had a blast decorating their apartment together and in the evening they cuddled on the sofa as blanket burritos and watched a Christmas movie while eating cake and drinking hot chocolate. Hiki smiled fondly at those memories while getting dressed after his shower. “It’s like I’m living in a cheesy romance movie…” he said to himself and giggled.

Howl entered their apartment and the air was filled with a delicious, familiar smell. He took a deep breath and smiled. “Hikkun, I'm home!” He took off his shoes as he suddenly heard his lover's voice.  
“Ah, Howl! Welcome home.” Hiki came out of the bedroom that was connected to the master bathroom, his hair still a little moist. He walked over to Howl, kissed him and took his briefcase. “Ugh, heavy. How was your day?” He asked and put the heavy briefcase away.  
“Busy. I'm glad I'm back home now, so I can recharge.” He grabbed Hiki and pulled him closer.  
“Wah, Howl!” Hiki gasped.  
Howl embraced him tightly. Hiki returned his gesture and clung onto him.  
“Batteries are charging...mmh…” Howl sighed peacefully and made Hiki smile. “...Hikkun…”  
“Hm?” Hiki felt so comfortable in Howl’s arms, he wanted to stay like that for a while.  
“Thank you.”  
“For what?”  
“Your presents for my employees. You’ve worked hard and made them really happy. To put the boxes on their desks as a surprise was a great idea. When did you even get up to do that? They would’ve liked to thank you personally though. Too bad you didn’t come in for lunch today.”  
“I’m sorry. I was so busy with the shopping and cooking…”  
“Don’t apologize, it’s fine. But I missed you.” He brushed a strand of Hiki’s long roseblond hair aside, buried his face in Hiki's neck and sniffed on it. “Mmmhhh you smell so good…like cinnamon and apples...” he started kissing and nibbling on his lover’s soft skin.  
“I-I just took a shower...ngh…”  
“I can tell, your hair is still a little a little wet...” Howl’s hot breath on his neck almost made Hiki lose his self-restraint.  
“Howl no...D-Dinner is almost ready…”  
“Can't I just eat you? You seem ready as well.”  
He pulled down the collar of Hiki’s shirt and gently bit into his shoulder.  
“Ow! No, you can't eat me!” Hiki giggled. “Listen,” he freed himself from Howl’s clasp and pushed him away. “I've put a lot of effort into this meal, so you’re going to eat it. Go and take a shower to cool off, I'll finish cooking in the meantime…” He turned around and started walking towards the kitchen entrance, but then he paused. He hesitated for a moment, then, without looking back, he added: “I-I already made something for dessert, but… Maybe you can... have me as a midnight snack... if you behave,” and dashed into the kitchen.  
Howl could see how red Hiki’s neck was, he must’ve been blushing like crazy.  
“Ugh… How unfair. So damn cute but also sexy at the same time…” Howl mumbled so that Hiki couldn't hear him. He turned around and trotted toward the bedroom to take a cold shower. By the time he was done, Hiki had already set up the big dinner table that was standing right next to the Christmas tree. Howl didn't believe his eyes. The big lights were simmered down and the room was drenched in candlelight. Hiki had put up candles everywhere, they gave off a warm and cozy atmosphere. The table was set up neatly with a white table sheet, decorated with little glass diamonds, blue rose petals made of silk and candles.  
Howl approached his lover, who was adjusting a fork and hugged him from behind.  
“Wah! Howl, hehe. You startled me. You finished your shower at the right time. I'm done, we can eat.” Hiki said, but Howl held onto him.  
“I knew that smell was familiar. You made an authentic British Christmas dinner?” Hiki’s heart jumped at the sound of Howl's soft voice next to his ear. Although he couldn't see his face, he knew that Howl was very happy. He placed his hands on Howl's, which were holding on to Hiki's chest.  
“Yup. It's roasted potatoes, Brussel sprouts, parsnips, pigs in a blanket, gravy and roast beef. And for dessert, I made a cherry trifle.” Hiki announced proudly. “I hope I did well and it will be to your liking.” He smiled insecurely.  
“It looks great! Thank you, Hikkun!” He kissed Hiki on the head. “Alright, let's dig in before it gets cold.”  
They sat down and started eating. Howl couldn't stop himself from expressing his pleasure by moaning and groaning repeatedly. He told Hiki over and over again how much he loved the food and how delicious it was.  
“You know, Hikkun… My mother wasn't exactly ‘the world’s greatest mom’, but every year on Christmas she made a big dinner for us. She rarely smiled, but during the holidays she smiled a lot. She had a wholesome aura surrounding her. It was her favorite season, and her cooking was great, but yours is even better! I think I've never eaten a roast beef this juicy and tender, and your brussel sprouts are just great, and that gravy, ooh…! I could eat this every day, we definitely have to save some for Sophie!” He munched excitedly and Hiki was beyond happy.  
“I'm so glad. I wasn't able to test cook any of the dishes, because I didn't have the time, so I had no idea if I can actually cook British food. I'm more than happy that you like it.” Hiki smiled brightly. Howl took his hand, kissed it and looked deep into his eyes.  
“I love you, Hikkun. You're the best thing that ever happened to me.”  
Hiki smiled. “I love you too, Howl.”

After they were done eating, they had decided to rest for a bit before cleaning up the table. Howl slumped down on the sofa and leaned back, Hiki snuggled against him, his head resting on Howl’s chest.  
“Wow, I ate so much. I'm stuffed like a turkey on Thanksgiving.” Howl moaned.  
“Hehe, yeah you ate quite a lot. I'll cook it again on Friday for Sophie. I don't want her to only have the leftovers. Oh, and tomorrow we'll go out with Kinsley and his wife, right? I'm kinda nervous since it's the first time I'll meet her.”  
“You don't have to be nervous, she's a very sweet and kind person. Don't worry too much.”  
Hiki was actually still more worried about meeting Sophie.  
“Hikkun, are you worried about meeting my sister too? You probably are, but you really don't have to. It will be fine, trust me.”  
Is he a mind reader?! Hiki thought. “I'm not nervous,” he mumbled.  
“You’re such a bad liar.” Howl chuckled.  
“Mh, it’s just… what if she doesn't like me?”  
Howl burst out in laughter. “HAHAHAHA! What are you talking about, Hikkun? That's absolutely impossible!”  
Hiki blushed and buried his face in Howl's chest. “Idiot…” he said with a muffled voice. Howl meant well by saying that, but Hiki's insecurities didn't disappear.  
“We've already talked about it, right? It's going to be fine.”  
“Yeah...Ah, Howl! I almost forgot!” Hiki jumped up and headed over to the guest room where he had hidden Howl's gift.  
“As you know, this is the first time I celebrate Christmas, and it was so much fun going Christmas shopping, decorating the tree and all that. I get to experience so many new things ever since I met you.” He smiled broadly, sat back down and handed Howl a big box wrapped in blue and silver Christmas themed wrapping paper. “It matches our tree, see?” He sparkled. Howl had a hard time not to jump Hiki on the spot. Once again, his cuteness was too much. He cleared his throat.  
“That's a nice detail, Hikkun.” He ruffled his hair and started unwrapping his present. Underneath the paper was a black, shiny cardboard box, so he opened it.  
“Hikkun!” He took his present out of the box, his eyes wide open in shock, while Hiki was fidgeting in excitement next to him.  
“Do you like it?” He smiled anxiously.  
“I absolutely love it! Such a high-quality briefcase! It’s beautiful and it’s more spacious than my old one!” He excitedly looked at the big, black briefcase from all angles and opened it to discover the pockets inside.  
“Yeah, since you get more clients, and your company becomes more and more successful, I’ve noticed that your paperwork has increased. This one is bigger, but the material is lighter, so it doesn't add much to the weight of all the papers and is easier to carry around all day. It also has more sections inside, so you don't have everything in one big section, making it easier to organize. And it has small bags on the outside for pens and your glasses case. I wasn't sure about the color since your other one is dark brown, but I thought the black would suit you well.” Hiki explained.  
Howl put his gift aside, grabbed Hiki and hugged him tightly. Then he loosened his grip, took his lover’s face in both hands and placed a long and tender kiss on Hiki's lips.  
“You thought about this thoroughly and picked the best gift. Thank you, Hikkun.” He kissed him again and switched from gentle pecking to a passionate deep kiss. Hiki’s mind started to go blank from the pleasure of feeling Howl’s eager tongue teasing the inside of his mouth.  
“Nh…mmh…haa” he moaned and panted while Howl started to unbutton Hiki's shirt. Suddenly Howl broke off their steamy encounter with a loud smack and paused.  
“Hikkun! Now I almost forgot your gift as well!” This time it was him jumping up, leaving behind a flushed, craving for more, Hikaru.  
Howl dashed over to his old briefcase and rummage around in it, while Hiki tried to get back to his senses, wiping the mix of their saliva from his chin, still huffing.  
“Here you go.” Howl handed him a small green box, with a glittering red bow on it. He lifted the lid and inside was a copy of his favorite book. It was the one he was reading when Howl arrived at their meeting at the ramen shop in Machida. Hiki was quite confused.  
“It’s the book from Usami-sensei… but I have a copy already, you know that…”  
“Open it.” Howl said short worded and Hiki did as he was told. He gasped.  
“H-Howl… this is…! Is this for real?!” He gasped and looked at Howl in disbelief.  
“Yes. It's a signed first edition of your favorite book. And he’s your favorite author, right?” Howl smiled.  
“IT SAYS ‘DEAR HIKARU-KUN, THANK YOU FOR SUPPORTING ME. SINCERELY, USAMI AKIHIKO’!!” Hiki yelled, completely overwhelmed, his cheeks glowing in excitement. “Howl, how did you even get this!?”  
“I was lucky to find the first edition at an old bookstore, and one of our clients is friends with him, so I asked her to get it signed for you… It’s no big deal.” Howl answered. But the truth was that it had been anything but easy. Howl had looked for the book on the internet for months and had searched countless bookstores for it. He almost won an online auction, but he got distracted with work and forgot to place a bid. He was lucky indeed though because a few weeks before Christmas he had found it at a very small bookshop after he had met a client at a Sushi bar nearby.  
“Howl… I don't know what to say…” Hiki teared up. “I'm so so happy! Thank you so much!” He huffed and embraced his lover. Then he got up, put the book on the table and took Howl’s hand. He bent forward and whispered: “I think it's time for your midnight snack,” as his face and ears took a glowing pink color.  
Howl swallowed heavily, surprised at Hiki’s sudden invite. He grinned and replied: “Let's dig in then.” Howl got up, took the lead and dragged his aroused boyfriend to their bedroom. Howl opened the door and the moment Hiki wanted to step inside, he felt a sudden jerk on his arm which almost caused him to fall, but Howl caught him. The only light source was that of the full moon flooding the bedroom, and when Hiki raised his head, he looked into his lover’s beautiful, glowing ice blue eyes.  
“Hikkun… I want you. Now,” he whispered.  
Hiki reached out and gently pulled Howl’s head down so he could reach his lips and kissed him passionately.  
“I want... you too… quick,” he panted in between their lustful kisses as they started undressing each other. Kissing breathlessly, they pulled off their jackets and shirts, and with only the pants left, Howl lifted Hiki up as Hiki twined his legs around Howl’s hips. He took Howl’s face with both hands and deepened their kiss. While Howl held him tightly, they moved over to the bed, the smacking sounds and their husky moans filled the air. Howl carefully placed Hiki on the big bed, interrupted their stormy kiss and moved down to Hiki’s neck to kiss and suck on his most erogenous zone eagerly.  
“Ah! Hmm! Nh!” Hiki trembled. Howl slowly worked his way down to Hiki’s collarbone, then to his pink nipples.  
“AH! Ugh…”  
Howl took his sweet time with his lover’s upper body. Hiki was very sensitive and Howl loved taking advantage of that, but Hiki started to become impatient. More! He wanted more!!  
“Haa… Howl, please… ahh…”  
“What is it Hikkun?”  
“P-Please…… down there… too…”.  
Howl grinned satisfied. He opened Hikaru’s jeans and pulled them off. “Oh, you’re feeling it a lot today. You’re already hard and leaking precum, nice.”  
Hiki could feel Howl’s gaze and his erect penis started twitching impatiently, but Howl didn’t touch him. He just kept staring for a bit longer, knowing that his lover’s impatience grew with every second.  
“Ngh...H-Howl, pl-”  
“Your legs. Spread them,” he said with a firm voice. Hikaru shuddered and did as he was told.  
“Wider.”  
Howl’s dark voice echoed in Hiki’s head. He had leaned over and his mouth was close to Hiki’s twitching dick now. So close he could feel his breath on his wet tip. But Howl still didn’t touch him. He was just staring at it. Chills ran down Hiki’s spine and he was breathing heavily, the tension was unbearable. He started tearing up unwillingly, his face feverish red. It was frustrating and arousing at the same time. “Kh…” He grit his teeth.  
Howl enjoyed teasing Hiki a lot, but when he noticed the tears, he was a bit appalled. It wasn’t his intention to make him cry. To make up for it, he placed his lips on the tip of Hikaru’s cock and devoured it.  
“NGH - UAH!” Hiki clung to the sheets, trying not to climax immediately.  
While Howl’s head was moving up and down and he was teasing the tip of Hiki’s dick with his tongue, he moved one hand to his pulsating hole, rubbing it gently with his fingers. Hikaru jolted from the unexpected sensation.  
“HN AH! HAH!” Hiki moaned.  
Howl continued sucking, licking and kissing Hiki’s dick diligently all the while slowly pushing one finger in, using the mix of saliva and precum, that was dripping down to Hiki’s greedy hole, as a lubricant. That familiar feeling of Howl’s fingers and being pleasured in two places at once, Hiki’s hips felt like they were melting. Howl added another finger and switched from sucking Hikaru off to jerking him off with his hand. He stroked his cock faster and tightened his grip while adding a third finger.  
“HOWL! Ah! Please, no…! NGH… STOP!” Hiki screamed, his eyes filled with tears. Howl stopped immediately to check up on his lover.  
“What is it Hikkun!? Does it hurt? Did I add fingers too fast?”  
“N-No… that’s not it. I just… don’t want to come like this. I want to cum… with you inside me. Together.” Hiki panted. Howl smiled at him, relieved that his lover was okay.  
“Alright, my sweet Hiki. As you wish.” Howl was still wearing his pants, so he got up from the bed and took them off. The sight of his muscular, sweaty body drenched in the moonlight and his rock hard dick… Hiki was about to burst of happiness.  
“He’s mine,” Hiki thought. “My Howl. My life.” He smiled at him fondly and opened his arms. Howl crawled back on the bed and embraced him.  
“I love you, Hikkun. Merry Christmas,” Howl whispered.  
“I love you too, Howl. So so much. Merry- AH!” Hiki wasn’t able to end his sentence. Howl had started to enter him carefully but eagerly, finally complying with Hiki’s pleas from before. Hiki trembled and moaned underneath him.  
“Is it okay for me to move,” Howl asked when he had fully entered him. Hiki loved how considerate his lover was, but sometimes he was a little too worried for Hiki’s taste. He wasn’t that fragile after all.  
“M-Move as you please. Even if you’re a bit rough, it’s fine. I-I like it,” Hiki confessed blushing and averted his eyes in embarrassment. Howl was a bit astonished. “Dammit, he’s just too cute!” he thought. He started moving and picked up the pace soon. He put a little more body weight into it than usual. Hikaru moaned and gasped in pleasure as he buried his fingernails into Howl’s back, which drove Howl wild. His mind went blank, his hips felt like they were moving on their own and he wasn’t able to stop.  
“Hikkun… Kh… You're so tight, you need to loosen up or I won't last long…”  
“MH I… CAN'T, SO GOOD… AH,”  
Howl's heart skipped a beat. He used his arm to lift up Hiki’s right leg, changing their position a little bit, so that his thrusts reached even deeper. He hit Hiki’s sweet spot relentlessly as he watched his reactions, which drove him even wilder.  
“…AH!! …YES!! …TH-THERE!! …AH HOWL THAT’S AMAZING!!! AH UAH” Hiki was trembling under Howl’s vigorous motions, clinging onto him.  
“AH, HOWL I – I’M…NH HAH”  
“Me too,” Howl grunted and after a few more thrusts both men climaxed simultaneously.  
“A-AAHHH!!!!”  
“NGHH!!”  
They both were completely out of breath, huffing loudly as Howl’s thrusts became slower and slower until they finally stopped. Back to his senses, he realized what just happened.  
“Hikkun, are you okay? I was so rough, did I hurt you?” Howl asked and carefully pulled out.  
“Hehe, I’m fine.” Hiki smiled lovingly and caressed his worried lover’s face, “But can we stay like this a little longer?”  
“Sure.” Howl smiled back in relief, lied down next to Hiki, covered them both with a blanket and wrapped his arms around him. Those moments were Hiki’s favorite. Being so close to the person he loved so much, there wasn’t anything better than that. Their sweaty bodies slowly calmed down and their breathing normalized.  
“Howl…” Hiki suddenly broke the silence.  
“Yes?”  
“Merry Christmas.”  
“Merry Christmas, Hikkun.”

 

 


	8. Jealousy, meeting Sophie and a big change

 

 

On the following morning, Howl was almost late for work, he had to hurry to get ready in time. Before he left, he peeked into the bedroom to look after his lover, who was still lying in bed, lifeless and more than glad that he was on vacation.  
“I'm off, Hikkun. Be at my office at seven, we'll go to the restaurant with Kinsley and his wife right after work……” But Hiki didn’t answer. “Hikkun, are you going to be okay? I feel bad for leaving you like this...”  
“Mmmhhh… have a nife day, woff hou~” he muffled into his pillow.  
Howl walked over to the bed, knelt down next to Hiki's head, brushed away some hair that was covering his face and kissed him on the forehead. “This is not how you tell someone that you love them. Say it again properly,” he whispered into his ear and softly bit his earlobe. Hiki, who already had shivers running down his spine from Howl’s erotic voice jolted. He raised his head from the pillow, flushed deeply and covered his ear with his hand in embarrassment. “Wah, stop that!”  
“Say it.” Howl grinned playfully.  
“Baka!” Hiki snubbed, but then he quickly pressed his lips on Howl’s and looked him into the eyes. “I love you... And now go! Hurry, or you'll be late after all. I'm fine, no need to worry!”  
Howl chuckled, got up and walked towards the door. “I’ll miss you. See you later.”  
“M-Miss you too...” Hiki stuttered and covered his glowing face with his blanket. Howl smiled lovingly and left for work.  
“Jeez…” Hiki said out loud, his heart pounding, then he sighed. He needed to get up, but he was exhausted. “Five more minutes.” He decided. He would've liked to blame it on the insatiable Howl, but Hiki was just the same. “Four rounds might've been a bit too much, though,” he said to himself. His hips and his back hurt like hell, but he had to get up. Since they ended up screwing around all night, they didn't clear the dinner table and the kitchen still looked like a battlefield. Hiki had to clean up, get some groceries and get everything ready for Sophie’s visit the next day. So he dragged himself out of the bed and slouched to the bathroom. Worth it, he thought while grinning but with a painful expression on his face. Totally worth it, he thought. Despite his aching body, Hiki was in high spirits. He managed to get everything ready before he had to leave for the dinner with Kinsley and his wife. He did the grocery shopping, cleaned everything up and put new sheets on the bed. Then he took a quick shower, got dressed and went down to Howl’s office.  
“Oh, Ueda-kun! Long time no see, how are you doing?” A tall man greeted him as he left the elevator.  
“Hello Sakata-san! I’m fine, thank you. How was your onsen trip?” Hiki replied, smiling.  
“It was great! I can highly recommend you to visit Hokkaido at this time of the year, it’s beautiful. Harada-san is in the conference room, his meeting should be over by now,” he smiled.  
“Ah, I see. Thank you Sakata-san. I’m happy to hear that you had a good trip. Are you leaving?”  
“Yes, I’m finally done for today. Everyone else has left already, but I was the recording secretary for the meeting, so I had to stay. But I can’t wait to get home to my wife and the kids. We’ll have Yakiniku tonight!”  
“Ohh that sounds great! Please pass my greetings to your wife and Miku-chan.” Hiki smiled brightly before the two men parted. Normally he wasn’t the sociable type. He was pretty shy and quiet, but he warmed up to Howl’s employees quite fast since they were all very kind to him from the beginning. Hiki made his way to the conference room at the other end of the big office. The walls were made of glass, so he could see Howl from afar. He was standing at a big conference table, browsing in some papers. Hiki’s heart skipped a beat. He couldn’t wait to be with him again. Without Howl he felt lonely and incomplete. He breathed in to call out for him, but at the same moment...  
“Shachou-san~~~” a girl’s piercing voice rang in Hiki’s ears from behind. He froze and with a “whoosh” a girl he had never seen before passed him and sashayed into the conference room. She approached Howl and touched his shoulder.  
Hiki grit his teeth and narrowed his eyebrows. “How inappropriate…” he thought. He became extremely irritated all of a sudden. He wasn’t able to hear what they were saying, but Howl turned around to her and… smiled. Hiki’s heart throbbed and his stomach hurt. He didn’t expect to see that. Then, Howl stuffed the papers into his new briefcase and left the room. “Let’s continue our talk tomorrow, Yoshino-kun, I have to leave now… Ah, Hikkun! You’re already here, great. The meeting took longer than expected. Kinsley is already on his way to pick up his wife, we’ll meet them at the restaurant.” Howl explained hectically.  
“Mhm, okay.”  
“Hikkun... why are you frowning? Are you okay? Are you not feeling well? Maybe we should cancel after all… I was already thinking about doing so when I saw what state you were in this morning.”  
“Shachou-san~, is everything okay? Your little friend looks kinda pale,” that girl squeaked as she showed up right next to them.  
“N-No, no! I’m fine, let’s go.” Hiki answered quickly, grabbed Howl’s wrist and dragged his startled lover along, leaving that annoyance of a girl behind. Hiki was pissed, but he didn’t want to say anything to Howl and ruin their dinner. He didn’t even know that girl. He didn’t know anything about her, but he still disliked her. Confronted with unpleasant emotions, Hiki went quiet until they arrived at the restaurant. Meeting Kinsley and his wife Leanne was a good distraction. It was the first time they met, and they got along very well. The four of them had a lovely dinner.  
When they arrived home, he put on his pajamas and went straight to bed.  
“Leanne is a very nice woman, isn’t she? You two got along well. I was afraid that you might not find many topics to talk about, since she’s much older than you, but luckily that wasn’t the case.”  
“Mhm. I like her.” Hiki responded briefly.  
“...Hikkun, are you sure you’re okay? You’ve been acting weird ever since you picked me up earlier.” Howl said after he got undressed, as he crawled under the blanket and joined his lover in their bed.  
“Everything is fine. Good night, sleep well. Love you.” Hiki replied and laid down, turning his back to Howl.  
“Tch. Again with that half-hearted ‘love you’...” Irritated by Hiki’s demeanor, Howl grabbed the blanket and pulled it so hard, it flew off the bed.  
“Hey, what’re you do-… wah!”  
Howl had gotten on all fours, was now towering over the stunned Hiki and stared at him intensely. “Something is wrong and I want you to tell me. Now.” Howl growled.  
“I said I’m fine, jeez. What’s wrong with you startling me like that?! Get off of me, it’s late, we should go to sleep.”  
“Hikkun, I won’t be able to sleep if you’re not telling me what’s gotten into you. Didn’t we say we’re going to be more open with the things that trouble us?” He knew how to get to Hiki in a way so that he would finally open up to him.  
“Kh, okay, okay. Let’s talk. But please, can you get off of me? Y-You’re only wearing shorts...it’s distracting.” He blushed and averted his eyes. Hiki’s head was red like a firetruck. Howl grinned and got up. “Let’s go to the living room and talk.” Howl suggested. “I don’t want to have serious talks in bed, this is our happy place after all.”  
“Silly…” Hiki replied to that as they got up and walked to the other room.  
“Sit down and wait,” Howl ordered Hiki and went to the kitchen. Hiki did as he was told and slumped down on the sofa. She shouldn’t have started this. He was tired and they both needed rest. But going to bed with those feelings was no option either obviously. A few minutes later his boyfriend came back and placed a big mug on the coffee table in front of him and sat down next to Hiki.  
“H-Hot chocolate?” Hiki’s eyes widened.  
“With whipped cream and sprinkles, just as you like it. You’re upset. You always make it when you’re upset.”  
“Thank you...” He took a big sip. “Fuaahh, you put cinnamon in it too…” he smiled wholesomely.  
“Of course. It’s good to see you smile again. Now please tell me what’s wrong. I hate to see you like this and not being able to do anything to make you feel better.” Howl reached out and wiped some whipped cream from Hiki’s nose.  
“You already did, though… I’m sorry, I’m behaving like a stupid brat.” Hiki looked down.  
“Well, you’re not behaving like yourself, that’s for sure. So please open up to me, okay?” Howl took Hiki’s chin and gently moved Hiki’s head so that he was looking at him. “Tell me.”  
Hiki swallowed. “I-It’s probably stupid, but… when I came to pick you up, there was this girl… and… she touched you and… y-you smiled at her. You never smile at anyone. Not at your employees, not at strangers when we’re out, not even at Kinsley and his wife tonight. Even though we laughed and giggled a lot, you didn’t laugh or… smile. You always have this stoic expression, your eyebrows are always slightly narrowed, even when you’re in a great mood. But… ever since we’ve met, you only smiled… at me. That made me feel very special, you know. And seeing you smile at that person… hurt. There, I said it! Ugh, I feel so ashamed now!” Hiki covered his blushing face with both hands, but his glowing red ears were still visible. Howl knew that this wasn’t the time for it, but he would’ve liked to jump Hiki on the spot. He cleared his throat and embraced Hiki. He held him tightly and answered.  
“It’s true. I wasn’t aware that you’ve noticed. I don’t like to show emotions. Even as a kid I got into trouble with my teachers because I seemed aloof and unsociable. See, laughter is one of the deepest emotions for me, I don’t want to show it to just anyone. But when I met you, I instantly knew that I wanted to show you that side of me. You’re pretty shy and not the most sociable person and you’re really bad at reading people, so let me make one thing clear. That smile I gave to that girl was just fake. She’s a pain in the ass and I can’t wait until her internship ends. The other day I responded to one of her questions when I was in a rush. Apparently, she didn’t take my tone well and started crying all of a sudden.” Howl sighed deeply. “Just thinking about it gives me a headache… Kinsley told me to be more gentle with her, so I’m touching her with velvet gloves now. It’s quite troublesome. You’re not very good at handling strong emotions you’re not familiar with. Being seriously jealous is probably a first for you, right?”  
“J-Jealous…?” Hiki muffled into his hands. Howl released him and let him sit up straight. Hiki looked at him with big eyes. “Yeah. You’re just the same as me. Although I’m happy that you’ve become better at talking to strangers and that you get along well with others,... I also hate it. Maybe now you can understand why.”  
Hiki understood exactly why. “But Howl… I mean smiling at others is normal. If you think it’s something so intimate…”  
“Of course it’s okay for me if you smile at others,” he chuckled. “I’m just a bit peculiar with certain things. I just want you to know that my true and honest smile, the one that comes directly from my heart, is a Hiki-exclusive smile.” And with that Howl smiled at him fondly. Hiki was so moved, he fell directly back into his lover’s arms.  
“Kh… I love you so much.” He huffed.  
“Ah yes. There’s a sincere one. I love you too Hikkun.”  
Hiki felt so much better, it was such a relief. The tiredness of his body and mind that he had held back until then caught up to him and he quickly nodded off in Howl’s arms, who carried him over to the bedroom and tucked him in. “Good night, Hikkun.” He smiled, left a kiss on his forehead and went to bed himself.

Then, the day he was going to meet Howl’s twin sister Sophie had finally arrived. Hiki was a nervous wreck. Not only because he would meet Sophie, but also because he hoped the dinner would be as good as on Christmas Eve. He started with the preparations early in the morning and cleaned the condo. Howl had told him that he would pick up Sophie at the airport at 6 pm. They should be home around seven. That should give him enough time to finish everything.  
In the end, he even managed to take a shower and to make a special dessert for dinner. Hiki was exhausted, but his excitement was stronger. He was just picking up the last dish from the kitchen to put it on the dinner table when the entrance door opened and Howl and Sophie entered.  
“Wow brother, this apartment has changed so much!” Sophie noticed loudly and scurried around the condo, checking every room. Hiki was standing in the kitchen with a bowl of mashed potatoes in his hands, frozen. He was too nervous to get out right away, so he used the time Sophie was looking around in their apartment to gather his courage to walk out and greet her.  
”It feels like a real home now, what happened,” she asked as she came back to the living room.  
“Hiki happened. He did all of this,” Howl answered proudly. In that moment Hiki entered the room.  
“W-WELCOME TO OUR HOME, I’M VERY HAPPY TO FINALLY MEET HOWL’S TWIN SISTER! LET’S GET ALONG WELL!” he accidentally yelled. It wasn’t his intention, he was just too nervous. And he was still holding those mashed potatoes. “I ruined it,” he though despaired. Howl noticed Hiki’s mood, walked up to him, took the bowl and kissed him on the forehead. “Hikkun, meet Sophie. Sophie, this is Hikaru.” He looked at the blushing Hiki and smiled as he walked away to put the bowl on the dinner table.  
“Oh my god, that was adorable!!” Sophie squealed and gave Hiki a long and very firm hug.  
“Ugh…”  
“Oi, Sophie! Don't break him, I still need him you know?” Howl scolded her.  
“Oops, I'm sorry! But... look at him, he's so cute,” she said as she pinched Hiki’s cheeks.  
“I'm well aware of that,” Howl replied grinning.  
“Waah, he's soft and squishy like a marshmallow! So cute, I want to eat you up!”  
“N-Nice to meet you, Sophie-san. I hope you had a nice trip. Are you tired? You're probably hungry, dinner is ready…” Hiki babbled nervously. Sophie turned around and glared at Howl, still pinching Hiki's cheeks.  
“Brother! Where on earth did you find him!? I want one too!”  
“Sorry Soph, he's one of a kind and he's mine, you can't have him.” Howl grinned teasingly while Hiki flushed.  
“Tche.” Sophie finally let go of Hiki who instantly started rubbing his tormented cheeks. “Not fair.” She stuck out her tongue. Sophie was even more beautiful than on the pictures Howl had shown him. Her silky, hip long, blonde hair was tied back in a low ponytail, her eyes were the same ice blue as Howl’s. She looked so graceful and pretty, but her charisma was that of a fighter. Still, Hiki couldn't believe that this woman was a martial arts pro. Though… after that hug...  
“Wow, amazing!” Sophie yelled when she noticed the loaded dinner table. “You made all this by yourself?”  
“Ah, y-yes. I hope you’ll like it, Sophie-san. They're traditional British Christmas dishes. I also made a cobbler for dessert.” Hiki explained smiling.  
“We should eat before it gets cold.” Howl proposed.  
“Yes, I'm starving. Last time I ate was this morning since they don't have food on short flights. Can't wait to dig in, it looks absolutely delicious, Marshmallow.”  
“M-Marshmallow…?” Hiki whispered, looking at Howl.  
“Just go with it, she has nicknames for everyone she likes.” Howl explained.  
‘Everyone she likes’, Hiki repeated in his head and smiled in relief. While they were eating, Howl and Sophie kept groaning and praised Hiki's food in the exact same way. He giggled at the thought of having another Howl around, but a female version of him.  
After the main course, Hiki served warm apple cinnamon cobbler.  
“I hope you'll like it. It was sort of an experiment,” he mentioned as he put the dessert on the table.  
“Hmmmm… It smells absolutely fantastic!” Sophie swooned. The cobbler was a success as well. Hiki was happy and after all the anxiety and stress fell off of him, he could feel how tired he really was. When they were done, Hiki got up to clear the table.  
“Nah ah! No way, marshmallow! After cooking such an opulent meal and all, you deserve a break. My brother and I are going to clean up. You go and get comfy on the sofa or something.” Sophie ordered.  
“I was just going to say the same. Go and rest, Hikkun. We'll join you in a bit.” Howl agreed with his sister.  
“B-But Sophie is our guest! I can't let our guest clean up…” Hiki tried to object, but Howl interrupted him.  
“Sophie isn't a guest, she's family.” Howl winked and smiled.  
“That's right, now shoo shoo, to the sofa with you. No further objections.” Sophie grabbed Hiki by his shoulders, turned him around and gently pushed him away. He gave in and trotted over to the sitting area.  
Howl and Sophie cleared the dining table, stored away the leftovers and cleaned the dishes that didn't fit into the loaded dishwasher. Hiki waited for them. It made him feel a little giddy that he wasn't allowed to help. At the same time, he felt like he would fall asleep any minute, but he pulled himself together.  
“How about we end this wonderful evening with a Christmas movie?” Sophie suggested as they joined Hiki on the sofa.  
“Here, Hikkun.” Howl smiled and placed a cup of hot chocolate with whipped cream topped with cookie crumbs on the table.  
“Ohh, thank you Howl!” Hiki sparkled.  
Howl sat down right next to him and didn't leave any space between them. Hiki grabbed his arm and snuggled against him, Howl’s hand was resting on Hiki's thigh. Normally Hiki wasn't that touchy feely with others around, but he felt so comfortable around Howl's sister already, that he lost his shyness. Sophie was busy picking a movie. “Oh, how about Home Alone,” she asked. Hiki and Howl agreed, so they started watching. A couple of minutes later, Howl noticed that Hiki's grip had loosened. He was sound asleep. Howl smiled lovingly.  
“He must've been really tired.” He got up and picked up his lover while Sophie turned down the volume.  
“Ah, don't worry. Once he's asleep, not even fireworks right next to his head could wake him. I'll take him to the bedroom.” Howl explained.  
“I'm envious,” Sophie chuckled.  
Howl brought him over and changed his clothes. After he was done, he tucked his lover in, kissed him on the forehead, whispered: “Sleep well, Hikkun.” and went back to the living room.  
“Everything okay?” Sophie asked.  
“Yeah. The past couple of days have been very busy for him.” Howl said as he slumped back down on the sofa.  
“... Brother…”  
“Hm?”  
“Are you… No, never mind, that question is pointless. You are happy, I can tell. You smile an awful lot, it's kinda gross.”  
“I am happy indeed. Very happy.”  
“And I can see why. Hiki is a wonderful person. Loving, kind, caring… I couldn't have wished for a better someone on your side. I'm glad you two have found each other. Take good care of him,” Sophie said while looking at the television.  
“I will.” Howl smiled. “Thank you, Soph.”  
“Shut up.”  
Howl grinned. “I think I'll head to bed too. I'll have to get up early tomorrow.”  
“Alright~”  
Howl left, went to the bathroom and then straight to bed. He scooted over to the still sound asleep Hiki, took his hand, kissed it softly and fell asleep too.  
On the next morning, Hiki woke up a little confused. Wasn't he watching a movie with Howl and Sophie a moment ago? But now he was in bed… holding hands with Howl…  
He must’ve fallen asleep last night, how embarrassing. He blushed, hoping Sophie wouldn't think badly of him now. He carefully released his hand from Howl’s grip and went to the bathroom to get ready. Afterwards, he headed to the kitchen to prepare Howl’s lunchbox and breakfast. He put rice into the rice cooker, cooked Miso soup and was about to stir fry some bacon and eggs when Sophie walked in.  
“Good morning, Marshmallow,” she greeted him.  
“Ah, g-good morning Sophie-san! Did you sleep well?”  
“I sure did. The guest room is really pretty and cozy, great job. But can you please drop the honorifics? We’re family, right…?”  
“Y-Yes! Thank you!” He smiled but immediately became serious again. “Uhm, about last night, I'm sorry for falling asleep, that was very rude of me!” Hiki bowed.  
“Awww, you're so adorable!” Sophie ruffled through Hiki's long hair.  
“Hey, no touching.” Howl entered the kitchen.  
“I'm your twin sister, yet I’m not allo-!”  
“No. I’m the only one who’s allowed to touch him,” he playfully glared at Sophie.  
Hiki blushed and Howl approached him to kiss his forehead. “Good morning, Hikkun.”  
“Good mor-... ah, stop stealing the bacon, you can eat when breakfast is ready, bacon thief!” Hiki yelled at his sneaky lover and took the piece of crispy fried bacon back. “Tch. Go and get ready, I'll be done soon.”  
“Fiiiine~” Howl pouted and left the kitchen.  
“You're strict, I like that. It's exactly what he needs.” Sophie was actually impressed.  
“He's like a child sometimes.” Hiki’s eyebrows were narrowed, but he had a loving expression on his face.  
“Oh yeah, he totally is.” She smiled. “Do you need help with anything?”  
“No thanks, I'm almost done. The only thing that’s left is making his lunch bento, but I'll put in some of the leftovers from last night, so it'll be done fast.”  
“Okay, I'll set the table then,” Sophie said and did so.  
After their meal Howl got ready to leave. “What are you two going to do while I'm gone,” he asked as he grabbed his new briefcase.  
“I thought about shopping and a movie if Hiki is in,” Sophie answered.  
“Sounds great,” Hiki approved smiling.  
“Alright then, have fun. I'm off.” He softly kissed Hiki on the lips and left. “I’ll miss you, Hikkun.”  
“I-I’ll miss you too, Howl.” Hiki was a little flustered. Doing something that intimate in front of someone else felt weird to him.  
“Ah, uhm… errr…” he stuttered blushing.  
“Calm down, Marshmallow. I've seen people kiss before. Although… I've never seen Howl treat anyone like that…”  
“L-Like that?”  
“Well, you know… so gently and loving.”  
Hiki went silent for a moment as they walked over to the living area and made themselves comfortable on the sofa with coffee and hot chocolate.  
“Did… Did he have many partners before?” Hiki asked shyly.  
“Not at all. His relationships were always kinda shallow. And I've never seen him with another man. He liked those girls, but I don't think he has ever been in love… until now.” She smiled.  
“I-I see…” Hiki blushed while fumbling on a strand of his hair, and couldn’t hold back a smile.  
“But that's actually something you should talk about with my brother. Anyway, your hair is pretty long. And it’s super silky, so nice. What do you use?” Sophie changed the topic.  
“Just shampoo and conditioner, but only silicone free products. I actually thought about cutting it the other day though, but I'm still not sure if I really should…”  
“Have you been to a hair salon to ask for a pro’s opinion?”  
“Oh no, I've been wearing my hair like this for a long time now, and if it gets too long, I just cut it myself.”  
“How about we go to a salon when we’re at the mall later, and if you feel comfortable with the hairdresser’s suggestions, you can get a haircut right away!”  
Hiki hesitated to give her an answer.  
“Ah, I'm a very impulsive person, that's probably not how you do things, sorry,” she realized.  
“No, it's okay, let's do it! Maybe it's time for a change now that I'm living a new life. And it got too long. I mean, it's almost mid-back. Let's go,” he said eagerly.  
“Alright!” Sophie replied smiling.  
Hiki cleaned up the kitchen while Sophie got ready, and then they left for the mall.  
Everything was still in Christmas decorations. Hiki enjoyed that certain atmosphere a lot. There were three hair salons at the mall and Sophie insisted to check out all of them. In the end Hiki chose a small, traditional looking one, that wasn't too crowded. The hairdresser was a nice, middle-aged lady whose kind smile warmed Hiki's heart. He felt very comfortable with her suggestions, so he decided to get his new haircut there. Sophie had challenged Hiki on not to look at the mirror until the lady was done, so he had no idea what was happening. He kept his eyes closed diligently, but it felt like she cut off an awful lot. He became really nervous, and Sophie’s “Ohh”’s and “Aah”’s didn’t help.  
“Okay, you can open your eyes now. Please don't faint, and please don't sue me, okay,” the woman said jokingly after finishing her work.  
She had shortened his hair so much, it went from mid-back to mid-neck. Hiki stared at his reflection in the mirror with his eyes wide open.  
“Marshmallow, are you frozen? Please don’t make me sing a song about a snowman now… Just so you know, you look very cute and handsome! I mean you looked just as cute before, but you give off a more mature vibe now. It really suits you a lot!” She tried to comfort him. “You also look more manly now!”  
“I can't believe I did this… M-Manly?” He whispered.  
“You don't like it? I'm so sorry. I kinda pushed you into this-”  
“N-No, I like it.” Hiki smiled. “It looks much better now, this haircut suits me way more! I wish I would've done this years ago.” He touched his hair and looked at it from all sites.  
“Wahhh, I'm glad! You really scared me there for a second!” Sophie laughed relieved.  
Hiki thanked the hairdresser who seemed very pleased, they paid and left the salon. On their way to a food stall to grab lunch, Hiki suddenly said:  
“S...Sophie…? Do you think… Howl will like it?” He touched his hair and looked down insecurely.  
“I'm 100% sure he's gonna love it! No need to be nervous. Jeez, I think you could even shave your head and he would still be crazy about you,” she chuckled.  
Hiki appreciated her pep talk, but he was still super nervous and insecure. What if Howl liked him better with the long hair? It was the look he had fallen in love with after all. And since Howl wasn't really gay in the first place, Hiki always felt like his feminine appearance was what Howl liked about him. Hiki's stomach felt weird. He just wanted to get it over with and show him. But he wanted to enjoy his time with Sophie too, so he decided to push those anxious feelings aside.  
The two of them had lunch and afterwards, they strolled through the stores, tried on clothes, and then they had Crêpes stuffed with ice cream and fruits. Hiki had a blast. He still didn't have any friends in Tokyo, so it was nice to spend time with Sophie. And he was bonding with her. They were very different in personalities, but they still got along great.  
Around 5 pm, Sophie suggested that they'd go to the movie theater.  
“My brother won't be home any time soon, right? Let's go watch a movie. There's one I would like to see. It's called ‘No Escape from the dark’. It got great critics. It’s super gory and scary, I'm sure you're gonna love it.”  
“Ah… uhm… A horror movie…?” Hiki stopped walking. “I-I don’t think that’s a good idea…”  
“Oh, so you’re a scaredy cat, huh?” She put her arm around his shoulders and dragged him along. “Haha, how cute! Come on, you'll live. I'll protect you, I promise,” she giggled.  
Hiki couldn’t handle horror movies at all, so watching splatter was a really really bad idea. He knew that, but he didn’t want to be a buzzkill, so he gave in.  
When it was over, he wished he would have chosen to be a buzzkill.  
“Hey, Marshmallow...you okay?” Sophie asked when they were on the train on their way back home, “You look a little pale…”  
“I’m fine,” he posed a smile. “Thank you for today, it was a lot of fun.”  
“For me too,” she returned his smile. “And don’t be anxious, my brother will love your new haircut.”  
Hiki swallowed heavily. He'd completely forgotten about that. Now that Sophie reminded him, his anxiety had returned. As if feeling bad because of that movie wouldn't have been enough… Hiki sighed.  
During the movie, Howl had sent him a text letting him know that he was already at home. Although he was afraid of his reaction, Hiki couldn’t wait to see him. He just always felt better when Howl was around.

 

 


	9. The new haircut

 

 

 

“We’re baaaack!” Sophie belted as they entered the condo.   
“Welcome back,” Howl answered from the sofa where he was sitting in front of his laptop. “Huh...where’s Hiki?”  
“Come on, Marshmallow! Don’t be shy!” Sophie called him as she slumped down on Howl's big armchair, grinning like a Cheshire cat.   
Hiki walked in slowly, nervously fumbling his sweater’s bottom hem.   
“I-I’m back, Howl…” He looked at Howl insecurely, scared of how he’d react to the much shorter hair.   
Howl looked at him, but his face showed no emotions. “Oh… you got a haircut.” And right after he had said that he looked at his laptop again.   
Hiki’s heart throbbed. He didn’t expect to get such a cold reaction. His emotions overflowed and he unintentionally started tearing up.   
“Marshmallow, you okay?”   
“Ah… I’m sorry…” he said as he wiped his eyes with his sleeves when he realized that Sophie was there too. How embarrassing. Normally Hiki didn’t care if others liked his appearance. He had been teased and made fun of for having long hair by his own family before, but it was so important for him to be attractive for the man he loved so much, and seeing Howl’s reaction he felt so dejected…  
“Ow! Hey, Sophie, what did you hit me for?” Howl suddenly shouted.   
“You made the Marshmallow cry, idiot.” She glared at him. “Anyway, I’ll head out to get us something for dinner. How about Italian? Great. I’m off then, see you later. Oh, and it’ll take a while. I feel like walking around for a bit, so… bye!” Sophie babbled while grabbing her coat and her shoes. Then she glared at Howl again and nodded into Hiki’s direction, saying “Talk to him, you dense moron!” only with her eyes, before leaving.   
“Tch, that woman… Hikkun, why are you crying?” Howl asked the dumbfounded Hiki while rubbing the place on his arm that his sister had just hit with her fist.   
“I-I'm not crying! It's because… You… Because… I…” Hiki stuttered. “Well, you obviously hate my new haircut, so of course I’m sad. I was very insecure already and super nervous the whole time, and I was looking forward to see you, but your reaction really hurt, you know!?” Hiki told his lover his honest feelings. “I mean you’re not gay in the first place, so you probably liked my long hair better because it made me appear more feminine, and now that I look so manly…” Hiki paused to catch his breath.  
“Manly…??” Howl mumbled.  
“I-I shouldn’t have gotten it cut! You hate it and telling from your reaction, you think I’m ugly and unattractive and you don’t like me anymo-”  
“Hikaru, enough with that nonsense already!” Howl interrupted him harshly. Hiki jolted.  
“E-Excuse me, I’ll go take a shower now. I’m itchy from the stubbles. Sorry for making a scene.” He turned around and rushed to the bathroom. He just wanted to escape that situation, but Howl followed him. Hiki was now standing in their master bathroom, his back turned to Howl who was standing right behind him. He was staring down at the black marvel tiles on the floor.  
“Howl, please leave. I need a minute.”  
“I’ll give you all the alone time you need if you just hear me out.”  
He stepped closer to Hiki and grabbed him from behind. He hugged him tight and whispered: “Please, Hikkun. Listen to what I have to say.”  
Hiki nodded eventually. He was hurt, but it wouldn’t be fair not to listen.  
“I’m an idiot, I’m deeply sorry. When I saw you… I was a little overwhelmed, you know… I thought you looked so cute with your long hair, I loved it when you tied it up in a ponytail with a few strands framing your beautiful face. I loved playing with it when I held you after we’d done it. And I loved grabbing it while we were-”  
“Howl!!” Hiki’s embarrassed voice echoed in the big bathroom. “Shut up.” He added silently. Howl was sure Hiki was beet red. He smiled fondly. “Hikkun, when I saw you with your new haircut I was shocked… but in a good way. You look even cuter now, I didn’t think that was even possible. And not only that, you also look incredibly erotic. I would’ve dragged you to the bedroom right away, but Sophie was there so I had to hold back. And trust me, that wasn’t easy.”  
Hiki’s eyes widened upon that unexpected confession.   
“In fact… it was really… hard…” Howl pressed his lower body against Hiki.   
“Ngh… Howl, are you really…”  
“Well, that sure isn’t a gun... Though it can sh-”  
“No, stop it!” Hiki laughed. “You’re so silly.” He placed his arms on Howl’s that were still wrapped around his chest. “W-Well… I think… we should do something about it...” His right hand wandered down and behind him and he caressed Howl’s erect dick. “Jeez, you’re really hard!”   
“It’s because you’re too sexy. All your fault.” He whispered directly into Hiki’s ear and moved down to kiss his neck. “Oh… this is nice. Now I can reach this place more easily. You’re so sensitive here…” he kept nibbling and kissing.   
“Ngh… n-no, I’m not,” he lied.   
“Hikkun, can we do it right here?”  
“Huh?”   
Howl didn’t wait for an answer. He gently started pushing Hiki forward until they’d reached the wall, and he pressed him against it. He continuously licked and kissed Hiki’s sensitive neck.  
“Nh… Howl… what if Sophie comes back?”   
“She won’t. But even if she does, she won’t come in here…” Howl huffed as he started undressing Hiki. “Put your hands on the wall. Left and right from your head. Leave them there.”   
“O-Okay…” he did as he was told. “B-But Howl, maybe she’d hear us… Wah!” There went Hiki’s pants and briefs.   
Seeing his lover’s exposed lower half, his hips sticking out so his hard dick wouldn’t touch the cold wall... seeing him in that vulnerable position drove him mad.   
“Well, I guess you’ll have to keep it down then.” He opened his pants and unraveled his raging boner. Hiki swallowed heavily.   
“Spread your legs more.”  
Again, Hiki obeyed and Howl positioned himself right behind him. “Wait, what about my sweater?”  
“If you’re completely naked, you’ll feel cold when you’re leaning against the tiles like this. Better keep it on. And you look so lewd half dressed, with your ass out…” Howl grinned.  
“Y-You’re so dirty…” Hiki blushed heavily.   
“Look who’s talking. Anyway, I’ll stretch you out now, but we’ve done it a lot lately, so that shouldn’t take long,” he said as he pushed two fingers inside his lover.   
“Aah!”  
“Hikkun, remember to keep your voice down,” Howl smirked.   
“Mh…” Hiki started panting while Howl thrust his fingers inside him continuously, trying not to make a sound.  
“You should be good. Please tell me if it hurts…” Howl said after a few minutes. He was so aroused, he couldn’t hold back any longer.   
“MMH… Ugh…” Hiki buried his face in the crook of his arm as Howl entered him slowly. It was a bit painful, but he also didn’t want him to continue.   
“Hikkun, keep your hips steady…” Howl huffed as Hiki was unconsciously moving away from him.  
“WAH!” Hiki’s erect dick suddenly touched the cold tiles on the wall, which caused him to jerk his lower body backwards into Howl’s direction, so he accidentally shoved Howl’s whole cock inside himself at once. “NGAH!! FUCK!!” He was leaning on the wall with his forehead, panting and sweating. He definitely wasn’t ready to be entered this quick and needed a minute to adjust.   
Howl chuckled.   
“W-What’s... so funny…” he asked annoyed between his pants.   
“Well, first of all, that was the first time I heard you cuss like this, and it was really cute. Second of all, that was kinda funny… like porn slapstick. And also, you’re very bad at keeping your voice down, Hikkun.” Howl leaned forward and closer to Hiki. “Maybe I should lend you a hand,” he said in a seductive tone while his right hand slipped underneath Hiki's sweater and caressed his chest while moving upwards to his collar, making its way out of the sweater to cover Hikaru’s mouth.   
“Hm?”  
“This way we'll make sure your voice won't get out…” Howl explained and started moving his hips.   
“Ungh!” Hiki jolted from that unexpected feeling. Howl kept thrusting into him. He had a hard time to stand straight, his hips and legs felt like they were melting. His hands were still placed on the wall, trying to hold on to something, although there was no way he could fall since Howl was supporting him.   
“Mhh… Ugh...AHH…!” Hiki moaned into Howl's hand as his thrusts became more and more vigorous. Hiki felt like he was about to lose it when it suddenly stopped.   
“Hikkun… I think I just heard a door shut. That's probably Sophie. You should try a little harder not to let your voice out.”  
Hiki's heart throbbed. Howl smirked and continued moving.   
“Hikkun, you're so cute,” he huffed as he noticed his lover's effort to keep his voice in. He could feel his hot breath on his hand. Hiki tried so hard, Howl wanted to tease him a bit more. He slowed down his thrusts and made them more shallow. Then he slowly put his index and middle finger inside Hiki’s mouth. His aroused lover started eagerly licking and sucking on them, saliva dripping down from the corner of his mouth.   
“Ngh… haa…”   
“Hikkun...kh… You’re so lewd. Listen… to the sounds you’re making. Listen closely.” Howl moaned, and Hiki became conscious of the noises that echoed in the big room. The wet sounds and the slapping from Howl’s thrusts, the sounds from him sucking on Howl’s fingers, Hiki’s silent moans and Howl’s aroused grunts. Hiki’s body tensed up and Howl moved his hips faster again.   
“Fo... ...deep… haa…” Hiki mumbled breathlessly. “Mmh…”  
“You really shouldn’t speak with your mouth full, Hikkun…” Howl grinned amused.   
“Fowwy… ah! Ngh… Howl, I’m… gonna...”  
“Me too...”  
“Infide me… iff ogay..! Haa!”   
“Together…”   
Hiki nodded and Howl thrust into him vigorously, they both tensed up and right before their peak, Howl felt the strong urge to bite into Hiki’s exposed, flushed neck. He did so and caused Hiki to bite down on his fingers. Hiki instantly climaxed and his twitching dick spurted a load on the wall. “Hikkun…” Howl kept thrusting into him, holding onto his lover's slender hips. “... Almost…” If he keeps going, I'm gonna get hard again, Hiki thought. But a few thrusts later Howl jolted and came inside him.   
“Kh… Ah…” he grunted. His hips slowed down and eventually stopped moving. As he slowly pulled out, Hiki felt like all strength had left his body and slumped down on the floor, leaning against the wall, huffing weakly.  
“Hikkun, you okay?” Howl knelt down and caressed his exhausted lover’s head.   
“Ngh. I’m fine. More than fine… that was… wow…” he panted.   
“Oh watch out, your cum is dripping down the wall.”  
“Wah!” Hiki jerked away from the wall and Howl couldn’t help but laugh out loud.   
“Idiot.” He blushed. “Help me up, will you.”  
Howl did so and supported him. “Are you okay? Can you stand on your own?”  
“I told you, I’m fine. Th-That was… amazing.”  
“Right? Hehe. You wanna take a bath?”  
“No, I’ll just take a shower. Sophie is back with the food, right? We should have dinner, I’m starving!” He smiled.   
“I’ll leave you here then… except you want me to help y-”  
“No no no no no! Get out, now! You’ve done enough already.” He playfully pushed Howl away.   
“Okay~” he grinned and left.   
Hiki sighed loudly and buried his face in his hands. “Oh my…” he blushed intensely. He was so happy. Howl didn’t hate his new haircut at all. It was the opposite. He could’ve just said so… he thought, but he didn’t want to complain. He giggled and turned on the shower.

After Hiki was done, he came out of the bathroom and walked into the living room. Howl was sitting on the sofa in front of his laptop again.  
“Are you working?”   
“Hm? Oh yeah, I needed to finish something up. How do you feel?”   
“I feel refreshed... Ugh!” He slumped down next to Howl and suddenly jolted in pain. Howl turned to him, worried. “Ah, I'm sorry, Hikkun… We didn’t use lube, it's probably irritated back there. Are you okay?”   
“It's fine~... How are your fingers?” Hiki took Howl’s hand and looked at the bite marks he had left. “I'm sorry.” He placed a gentle kiss on both fingers.   
“It's okay, it was a reflex because I bit your neck. But you're so sexy, I couldn't hold back. I want to eat you up.” Howl said as he pushed Hiki down and leaned over him, his face buried in his lover’s neck, acting as if he’d eat him.   
“Waaah, stop it! No way, you can’t eat me! Didn’t we want to have Italian for dinner?!” He laughed loudly and tried to push him away to save himself. “Oh wait, wait! Howl, stop it for a second!”   
“What is it? I’m feasting!”   
“Now that I think of it, where’s Sophie?”  
“Sophie? Oh well, you see… the thing is…”  
Suddenly, the sound of a slamming door came from the hallway.   
“I’M BAAACK!” Sophie belted.   
“Speaking of the devil…” Howl mumbled as he got off of Hiki and sat back down.   
“Sophie?” Hiki looked at her surprised as she walked into the living room, aiming for the dining table. “I thought you’d been back already…”   
“No, I took my time so you two could settle your little lover’s quarrel.” She smiled and started unpacking the bags from the Italian restaurant. Hiki glared at Howl.   
“Tch, you liar,” he whispered at the grinning Howl. “I’ll help you, Sophie,” he added, got up and got plates and silverware from the kitchen, while Howl shut down his laptop. Then they gathered at the big table.   
“Ngh!” He jolted again as he sat down.   
“Ouch! Hey Sophie, stop punching me all the time!” Howl yelled at his sister.   
“You deserve it, and you know it!” She replied knowingly. “Marshmallow, I brought you Calzone, Howl you have Pepperoni and I got myself some Pasta. Yummy!”  
“Oh nice, I haven’t had Pepperoni Pizza in a while.” Howl said excited while opening his Pizza box.   
“Ah Sophie, you remembered, thank you!”   
“Of course, we just talked about Italian food this morning. Here…” She handed him his steaming hot Calzone.   
“Wow Soph, this Pizza is amazing, where'd you get it?”  
“It's a small restaurant, you can easily overlook it, but it has awesome reviews. The Chef is from Italy.” Sophie explained.   
“You can absolutely tell. It tastes exactly like the pizza you get there!” Howl swooned and took another big bite.   
“You have been to Italy before?” Hiki asked surprised.   
“Sophie and I traveled there before we moved back to Japan since it's not as far away from England as from Japan. We wanted to go on a little adventure, so we had a backpacking trip. We went for three weeks, it was great! The food was so good and no matter where we went, the people were hearty and kind.” Howl remembered.   
“Woow… I never left Japan. I wish I could travel overseas~”   
“Where would you like to visit?”   
“Great Britain! I mean… I'd love to see the place where you lived for so long… to… learn more about you and your past…“ Hiki blushed.   
“We'll go one day, Hikkun. I promise.” Howl smiled at him.   
“Awww, you guys are too cute!” Sophie giggled.   
“Shut it.” Howl barked at her. The three of them enjoyed their dinner and talked about this and that when Howl suddenly asked:  
“By the way, what have you two been doing today while I was at work?”   
“Well… We went to all the hair salons to pick out the best one, got Marshmallow's hair cut as you know, then we were shopping, ate unhealthy stuff and in the end we watched a movie.” Sophie listed.  
“What kind of movie did you watch?” Howl asked warily.   
“It’s called ‘No escape from the dark’. It's super gory! We had a blast!” Sophie answered innocently.   
“Dammit, Sophie! Why did you have to drag him into a horror movie?” Howl scolded her.  
“She didn’t drag me, I was okay with it!” Hiki defended her.  
“You're going to have nightmares, Hikkun.” Howl sighed. “You couldn’t even handle that thriller we were watching a while ago, remember? You had nightmares and started fighting off the bad guys in your sleep and when I tried to wake you up, you punched me in the face.”  
“Th-That was by accident! And I apologized multiple times for making your nose bleed!” Hiki flushed and Sophie burst out in laughter.  
“I know, but I think it might be better to put up a barrier between us tonight. Or maybe I should wear protection gear. Better safe than sorry...” Howl teased him.   
“Idiot...” Hiki pouted. Still, he couldn’t help but smile.

After they had finished eating, they decided to go straight to bed. Howl took a shower, while Hiki went straight to bed. When Howl was done he came to the bedroom, crawled under the blanket and scooted over to Hiki and tightly embraced him from behind. They stayed silent for a while, enjoying their closeness. Hiki felt so relaxed.  
“Hikkun…?”  
“Hm?”  
“What you said earlier… There is absolutely no way on earth that I will ever stop loving you, okay? You could shave your head and gain 100 pounds and I would still be all over you 24/7.”  
“I'm sorry for saying that.”   
“No, I'm sorry. Sometimes I'm not the best at expressing my feelings properly. I didn't mean to hurt you.” His grip around Hiki's chest tightened a little.   
“I know…” Hiki took his hand and their fingers entwined.   
“Let’s do something together tomorrow, just the two of us. I miss being with you.”  
“What about Sophie?”   
“She said she wants to meet up some old friends from Uni tomorrow.”  
“Okay, sounds good.” Hiki felt a little bad for being happy about having some alone time with Howl. He really loved Sophie, but they didn’t have much time together during the week, so he was always looking forward to his Howl-time on the weekends.   
“How about we go ice skating? Have you done that before?”  
Hiki slightly shook his head. “No, I haven’t.”  
“I guess that’s another first of yours I’m going to take then.” Howl smiled and kissed Hiki on his head.  
“You can have ‘em all…” Hiki mumbled as he drifted off to sleep.   
“Good night, Hikkun. I love you.”  
“G’night, Howl... I love you so so mush.”

It was a very restless night for Hiki. Just as Howl had predicted, he was plagued by terrible nightmares. Around three in the morning Howl woke up due a sudden sharp pain in his stomach. “Ugh! Hikkun… Did you just kick me,” he moaned. But Hiki didn't respond. Howl turned on the lamp on his nightstand and saw his lover moving around restless with a distressed expression. He sighed.” I love you more than anything in this world, but if you watch another scary movie in the future, I'll…” He sighed again and decided to move to the comfortable blue XXL sofa on the other end of their bedroom. It was Hiki's favorite place to nap and to read for a reason. It was cozy and soft, so Howl fell asleep soon. When he woke up the next morning he felt like on clouds. He felt so warm and… “Hikkun?” As he opened his eyes, he saw his lover curled up and snuggled against his chest. “Are you a cat…?” He smiled fondly and caressed Hiki's cheek.   
“Mmh… g’monin’...” he greeted Howl with his eyes still closed, stretched out while moaning and hugged him tightly.   
“You followed me here?”  
“I woke up from a nightmare and you weren't there. I felt lonely…” He mumbled into his boyfriend's chest.   
“Well, a certain someone was fighting some demons last night and kicked me in the guts. I had to flee…” he chuckled. Hiki raised his head, his eyes were opened wide in shock.   
“I'm so sorry, Howl!” He blushed hard and covered his face with both hands in shame.   
“It's okay, Hikkun. But promise me, no more horror movies.” Howl grinned and caressed Hiki's hair.   
“I promise, I promise!” He hugged Howl tightly.   
“Although… Maybe there's a way for you to make up for it…” His hand moved down from Hiki's head to his back and his fingertips slid down his spine. Hiki shuddered.   
“Wah!” Howl suddenly jolted as Hiki unexpectedly sucked hard on one of his nipples and released it with a loud smack.   
“No way, pervert.” He glared at his startled lover. “We just woke up and you already want to do it.” Hiki pushed him away. “I'm also still a bit sore back there. Yours is just too big to do it without lube…” He blushed.   
“Hmm… How about some touching and sucking only, then?” Howl's hand now moved to Hiki's front and into his pajama pants, aiming straight for his dick.   
“Hngh! Stop it!” Hiki jerked and jumped off the sofa. “We wanted to go ice skating today, remember? If we start that now, there's no way we're gonna leave this room today at all.” He straightened his pj's. His face was flushed and his hair messed up. So damn cute, Howl though.   
“I'm gonna head to the bathroom first.” He sighed and walked away. Howl chuckled. Flustered Hikkun was just the best.

 

 


	10. The Ice Skating Rink Incident

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Howl and Hiki are going ice skating. It's Hiki's first time and he's doing well, but then something happens...
> 
>  
> 
> *Note: Nenmatsu Nenshi: end of the year beginning of the year. Holidays in Japan, usually between New Years and the 4th of January

Hiki, Howl, and Sophie had breakfast together and afterwards, Sophie left to meet her friends while Hiki and Howl headed to the Tokyo Midtown Ice Rink.   
“Hikkun, are you sure you still want to do this? You must be tired…We can also go back home and play ‘the floor is lava and we’re trapped on sofa island’...” Howl suggested as they got out of the car. Hiki giggled.   
“No, it’s okay, I was really looking forward to this. I just hope my butt will survive, hehe.”   
“Your butt can put up with a lot...” Howl smirked.  
“Howl!!” Hiki grumbled as he bumped his shoulder with his fist. “Pervert! I was talking about falling… jeez.”  
They got their rental skates and Howl helped Hiki to put them on. “They need to be tight, so you will be steady on your feet.” Hiki still had a hard time walking, so Howl supported his lover on their way to the rink.   
“I’m so bad at this already and we’re not even on the ice yet…” Hiki noticed worried.  
“It’s fine, be patient and give yourself some time. Once you get used to it you’ll be able to move around better, trust me. Let’s see if I still have my skating mojo…”   
Hiki stood at the rink entrance as Howl stepped on the ice and, to Hiki's surprise, began sliding around gracefully.   
“Whoa, Howl! You're so good at this!” Hiki exclaimed as he stared at him in awe.   
“When we were little, Sophie and I would go ice skating a lot during the winter, so I became quite good at it, I guess…” Howl was whirling effortlessly around the ice; sliding backwards and doing tricks… He looks so cool, Hiki thought, his heart starting to beat faster. Howl turned and started gliding back towards Hiki, slowing down before stopping in front of him and offering his hands to his insecure lover. Hiki hesitated for a moment, but Howl’s bright smile was all it took to convince him. He took his hands and stepped on to the ice slowly.   
“Don't let go of me, Howl,” he begged.   
“Never.” Howl smiled and kissed Hiki’s hand. He dragged him along, slowly and carefully. “Wah, it’s more slippery than I thought!”   
“It’s okay, I’m here. And we’re still close to the side rails, so if you feel like you’re getting too shaky, just hold on to them.”  
“No, it’s fine. Holding on to you is better.” His nose and cheeks were red from the cold, and even though it was hard to tell, Howl was sure Hiki was blushing. They stayed close to the side rails for a while and Howl was sliding, holding both of Hiki’s hands while teaching him how to skate until Hiki's movements became steadier and he became more confident.   
“See, you're getting a hang of it! You're a quick learner, I’m proud of you.” Howl cheered him on. “Wanna try doing it by yourself?”   
“Yes…” Hiki nodded eagerly and let go of Howl’s hands. He was still a bit scared of falling, but, surprisingly, he was doing very well. He was gliding on the ice, Howl right next to him and they moved more to the middle of the rink.   
“H-Howl…”   
“What is it, Hikkun?”   
“Can you hold my hand please…?” He asked shyly.  
“You're not going to fall, you're doing great!”  
“No, it's not that… I just want to hold your hand…” he mumbled. Howl smiled at him fondly and took his hand, their fingers entwined. Hiki wished they wouldn’t have had to wear gloves, but it was a rule to skate at that rink. Although it had become very crowded on the ice, Hiki didn't even think about anyone seeing them holding hands. He was too happy to be on a romantic date with his boyfriend.   
“Are you having fun, Hikkun?” Howl asked after a few laps.  
“Yes, it’s great! But…”  
“What is it? Are you tired? You’re still not used to it and holding your balance must be tiring. Let’s take a break.”  
“No, you can stay! I'll just slide over to the exit and watch you from the side rails for a while.”  
“You sure? The exit is all the way over there, it’s pretty far. I can bring you over…”   
“It’s okay, I’ve gotten pretty good at this,” he smiled broadly and let go of Howl's hand. “See you in a bit.” He turned around and slowly moved away, making his way through the moving crowd. He could’ve finished the lap with Howl so he wouldn’t have had to skate across the whole rink to get to the exit, but it was a really big rink and had gotten pretty tired from all the tension in his muscles. I should probably start going to the Gym or something, he thought while trying not to collide with someone. He still had trouble with breaking so he tried not to go too fast, but suddenly he had to pick up the pace to get out of someone’s way, couldn’t break and promptly crashed into someone. It was a butch looking guy who was standing around with his friends and Hiki reflexively held onto him so he wouldn’t fall. “Wah! I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he shouted while trying to regain his balance.   
“What the hell,” that guy barked.  
“Isn’t that the fag we saw holding hands with that other fag earlier,” one of his friends asked loudly. “Oi Tenshi, looks like you have a new boyfriend,” he teased him and the others burst out in laughter, which made that guy really angry.   
“Shut up! Hey you stupid fag, fuck off!”   
Hiki had just become steady again and wanted to let go of him, but he suddenly turned around and pushed him hard. Hiki slipped and fell backwards on the ice.  
“Ugh…! Ow...”  
“You disgusting little shit, don’t fucking touch me! I don’t want to catch a disease, gross,” he yelled while brushing off his clothes and his friends were laughing in the background like hyenas.  
“I’m not disgusting,... people like you are,” Hiki mumbled, still sitting on the ice, holding his left arm because it hurt.  
“What did you just say?! I’m gonna beat the shit out of y-”  
“HIKARU!” Howl suddenly appeared and knelt down to look after his lover. “Hikkun, are you okay? What happened? Hey you! What did you do to him?” He wanted to get up and go after that guy, but Hiki held him back.   
“It’s fine, Howl. It was my fault. I crashed into him,” he said in a monotonous voice.  
“Yeah, that’s right! It was his fault! Teach your bitch to behave.”  
“You little bastard!” Howl yelled. “I should teach you a lesson…!!” Again, Howl wanted to get up but Hiki still didn’t let him.  
“Hahaha, what are you gonna do, four eyes? Gay me to death?” The group of hooligans burst out laughing again. Howl started to make a move into their direction but Hiki clung on to his arm.  
“Please don’t., they’re not worth it. Can you help me up?” Hiki looked at him pleading.   
“Sure, Hikkun.” Howl turned to Hiki and supported him, paying no further attention to the hyenas and their leader.  
“Ngh… ugh…” he moaned while getting up.   
“Are you injured?” Howl asked worried as the bullies moved away from them while cussing and insulting them repeatedly but Howl was too focused on Hiki to notice their taunts.  
“I’m not sure…” Hiki answered, trying to ignore them.  
“Where does it hurt?”  
“My arm hurts. And my back.”  
“The left one?”  
“Yeah... “   
“Does this hurt,” he asked as he touched Hiki's arm.   
“Ngh!” He jolted. “A little bit… It’s my wrist...”  
“It’s starting to swell...” Howl looked it over a bit more before deciding, “Let's get you to a hospital.” They quickly left the rink, Howl helped Hiki change his shoes, and then they headed to the nearest emergency room. Hiki sat in the passenger seat holding his injured arm, slightly nervous at Howl’s erratic driving. He didn’t want him to get a ticket for something as minor as a hurt arm. “Howl, please slow down, it’s not like I’m bleeding or anything…” But Howl stoically stared at the road, not answering to Hiki’s request.   
When they arrived at the clinic, they, fortunately, didn’t have to wait for long before being called into the examination room. Howl treated Hiki very gently, but he hadn’t said a word since they had left the rink. Hiki knew that he was very angry at those guys, and when he was like that, he always shut down and became quiet. And because he knew that, he just waited patiently until Howl would calm down. He got examined and they took x-rays of his arm and back. The diagnosis was a bruised wrist and tailbone. Hiki had to wear a cast for two weeks, and the doctor told him to rest, so his tailbone could heal. They were both very relieved and by the time they got home Howl had calmed down.   
Hiki was limping a little bit because his back really hurt. Bruised tailbone, he thought and rolled his eyes.   
“Hikkun, go lay down on the sofa, I’ll get you an ice pack. The doctor said we have to cool your wrist. I’m gonna head to the pharmacy later and get your pain-relief ointment. Wait, do you want to go to bed instead? It’s more comfortable...”  
“Howl, I’m fine, really.” Hiki giggled and walked over to the sofa after Howl had helped him to take off his shoes and coat. He slowly and carefully sat down, trying his hardest not to make painful noises so Howl wouldn’t worry even more. He sighed, grabbed a pillow and lied down on his right side because of his injured left arm. Howl came back from the kitchen, sat down next to his legs, gently took Hiki’s arm and placed it on his lap. He looked at the cast and carefully caressed his fingers.  
“They’re swollen too… I’m glad it’s nothing major, but your hand doesn’t look good. It must be painful,” he said with a sad voice and put the ice bag on his wrist.   
“It’s fine. It’s only throbbing a little.” Hiki answered. “Hikkun... don't let what that idiot said get to you, okay? He's just a pathetic-”   
“I'm not, don’t worry. At first, I was shocked, I didn’t expect him to lose it like that just because we’re in love. That’s so stupid. But I don't care what anyone thinks or says. ‘Just because there are people who don’t like it, doesn’t mean it’s wrong or something to be ashamed of’, right? That’s what you said. But... it’s too bad we had to end our date early, it was so much fun. Can we go again soon, please?” Hiki looked at him with puppy eyes. Howl, slightly taken aback, smiled.   
“Of course, Hikkun,” he replied in a gentle tone. He was relieved that Hiki was okay; mentally at least. And he was happy that Hiki had become more self-confident. Then, a sudden, very loud growling noise coming from the direction of Hiki’s stomach interrupted his train of thoughts.  
“Ah, sorry!” Hiki giggled.   
“Wow, that was loud! How hungry are you?” Howl chuckled. “Alright, what do you want to eat? I will cook anything you want.” He got up, kissed HIki on the head and walked towards the kitchen entrance. Hiki raised his upper body and leaned on his right elbow.  
“But Howl, it's Sophie's last night here, we wanted to go out, remember?”   
“Right… But you should rest, Sophie will be okay with eating here.”  
“But… I was really looking forward to it. I wanted to visit that restaurant for so long, they have the best king crabs, I wanted to try them… together with you and Sophie.” Hiki looked at him with puppy eyes.   
“Hikkun, you broke your arm and your butt and that’s painful, right?”  
“I didn’t break my butt!” Hiki giggled. “Yeah, it hurts a little, but the doctor gave me painkillers, so it’s fine. Please Howl~ I really, really wanna go~”  
“But he said… Ah, jeez... Alright, alright. I know that I tend to dote on you, sorry…”.   
“Can you come here, please?”  
Howl did so and walked over to Hiki. He knelt down next to him. “What is it?”  
Hiki leaned over and kissed him. “That’s one of the many, many things I love about you.” He kissed Howl again. “I know you’re worried, but I’m okay. It’s nothing major.” Hiki said with a gentle voice and smiled. Howl sighed heavily and hugged him tightly. “I hate when you’re hurting or when you’re sick. I want you to be happy and healthy… always.” Howl’s warm hand slipped underneath Hiki’s sweater and his fingertips slowly slid up his spine. Hiki shivered. “Hikkun… we can’t do it until your butt has healed, you know...” Howl whispered into his ear. Hiki’s heart throbbed. He hadn’t even thought about that.   
“Mh… B-But…”  
“We can’t go all the way, Hikkun. But we can do other things...” He nibbled on Hiki’s earlobe and his hand slowly moved downwards. Hiki’s heart started beating faster as Howl placed his hot lips on his. He opened his mouth and they indulged in a passionate deep kiss when suddenly the front door opened.  
“I’m back~!” Sophie’s loud voice pulled them back to reality and ended their steamy encounter.   
“Oh, am I interrupting something here?” She asked with a cheeky grin when she entered the living room. “Oh, Marshmallow what happened? Is that a real cast,” she asked worried when she noticed Hiki’s arm.  
“I had a little accident at the ice rink… I fell. It's not as bad as it looks.” Hiki played it down.   
“Some asshole pushed him, actually. His wrist and butt are bruised,” Howl explained.   
“It’s not my butt! It’s my tailbone!” He sighed. “It was my fault. I couldn’t break and slammed into him, then he pushed me away…” Hiki corrected as Sophie took off her coat and Howl got up. “Howl wasn’t there, so he didn’t witness the whole scene.”  
“I saw enough. There was no need for his behavior. Not like you attacked him.”   
“What a dick! I'm sorry, Marshmallow. Does it hurt?”   
“It's fine, it doesn't hurt.” Hiki smiled.   
“Liar,” Howl mumbled and Hiki glared at him. “I’ll go and prepare a little snack. We still have three hours before our reservation and you’re hungry. When you’re done eating, you’re gonna rest. No objections.”   
“Marshmallow, you better listen to nurse Howl. He can be very strict, but he's the best caretaker ever.” Sophie nodded knowingly. Hiki smiled.   
“I know. Thank you, nurse Howl,” he smiled at his lover. Howl clicked his tongue and went to the kitchen to prepare some sandwiches. When he came back to the living room with the plate, Sophie gestured him to be quiet.   
“Shhh… look,” she pointed at Hiki who had fallen asleep. “Watching him nodding off was like watching one of those kitten videos on the internet. He tried so hard not to fall asleep, but he lost that fight,” she giggled. Howl put down the plate and looked at his exhausted lover.  
“Good grief.” He took a blanket and covered Hiki with it. He caressed his face and sat down next to him. Sophie watched her brother with a loving smile on her face.   
“It’s good to see you like this. It really warms my heart.”  
“Shut up.”  
“No, seriously. I would’ve never thought that you’d find someone you love this much and who would love you back just the same.”  
“He’s special.”  
“He sure is.”  
“I hate that I put him through stuff like this.”  
“What do you mean?”   
“Those idiots in the rink… they called him a fag... and other things. I should protect him from situations like this, but I wasn’t able to. In fact, he got into this situation because of me. I’m the one who told him that it’s okay to show our love. That I don’t want it to be a secret or a forbidden thing, that I don’t want to hide it, because there’s no reason for us to be ashamed or anything. But I think I didn’t realize how much of a burden it might be on him. He was humiliated and got hurt because I forced my beliefs on him…” Howl grit his teeth.   
“You’re such an idiot. Do you think he would do something he doesn’t believe in? I only just met him, but I can see how strong his character is. Don’t you realize that? He can put up with situations like this. When you made the sandwiches he told me how much fun he had and how great you were on skates. His eyes were all sparkly, he was so happy. Of course that situation left an impact on him, but it doesn’t have to be one of the negative kind. If anything, I think that made him stronger. At least that’s how I assess his character. And his body will heal. Don’t underestimate him, brother. You got yourself a feisty one there.” She smiled. Howl didn’t answer. He just sat there, watched Hiki sleep and thought about his past and how he was raised. Of course he was strong. He always had to be. Still, that urge to protect him was growing inside Howl.  
“Well, I’ll go to my room and rest too, brother. There’s this new book I just started and I can’t wait to find out who the killer is. See you later, brother.” Sophie got up and left. Howl decided to get his laptop to get some work done. Around two hours later Hiki opened his eyes.   
“Mh… Howl? Ugh, did I fall asleep again?”  
“Yes, you did. How do you feel?” He turned away from his laptop and caressed Hiki’s face.  
“Better actually. Ngh…” He sat up and noticed his bruised back again.   
“You sure about that? Maybe we should stay h-”  
“No! I’m fine, let’s go to the restaurant!”   
“Haa… Alright, let's get ready then. I'm gonna go and tell Sophie.” Howl got up. “Want me to help you with anything?”  
“Nope, thank you. Wah, I'm so excited! But it's also sad because Sophie will leave tomorrow morning…” Hiki said as he slowly sat up. He noticed that his back was hurting more than his arm.  
“Yeah, I'm going to miss her too. But there's still Skype and all that, so you can stay in contact with her and she'll visit us again.”  
“That's true…”  
“Get ready Hikkun, the reservation is in one hour and we have to drive there too.”  
“Yeees!” He got up and got dressed. The three of them left and had a great night at the restaurant.   
On the next morning, they had to get up at 6 to take Sophie to the airport. When they had reached her gate she turned to them and said: “Marshmallow, it was such a pleasure to meet you. I had so much fun, thank you. I’m truly blessed to call you family from now on.” She smiled widely. Hiki, moved by her words, teared up and hugged her. Sophie was surprised, but of course, she returned his loving gesture.   
“Sophie, I’m gonna miss you…” Hiki sniffled.  
“Me too,” she said out loud and then whispered: “Take good care of my idiot brother for me, okay? He needs you.” She had a hard time holding back her own tears.   
“Mhm!” Hiki nodded, let go of her and rummaged around in his pocket, looking for a tissue. Howl stepped closer and put his arm around his emotional lover’s shoulder.   
“You’re crying, Soph? What a rare sight. Don’t wait too long with your next visit, okay?”   
“Shut up, idiot. I’m not crying,” she replied, clearly struggling with her emotions. She turned to Hiki, pinched his cheeks, quickly turned around, grabbed her bag and dashed away, so they wouldn’t see that she lost her inner fight and teared up after all. Howl chuckled. “Come on, Hikkun. Let’s head home.”  
Hiki nodded and they walked back to the car.   
“Family…” Hiki mumbled while staring out of the car window on their way home, Sophie's words sounding in his head. It was snowing a little, the streets were as crowded as always and a jazz song was silently playing in the radio. Howl placed his hand on Hiki’s thigh.   
“You miss your family, don’t you?”   
“Hm? Oh… well, I haven’t seen them since I moved out. With the renovations, Uni, work… there was no time to go to Machida. Too bad Hajime caught a cold and wasn’t able to spend Christmas with us. I mean we skype all the time, but I really miss Hajime and Kaito a lot…” Hiki said, watching the passing scenery.   
“Do you feel lonely?”   
“What?” He looked at Howl in surprise. “No, not at all!” His hand unconsciously slipped underneath Howl's and pressed it.  
“You haven't made any friends here so far, right?”   
“Well… no. But there are people at Uni and work that I get along with very well. And I have you, so I'm not lonely. I just miss my family a little, isn't that normal?”  
“Yes, it is.” Howl lifted Hiki's hand and kissed it. “Let's stop somewhere for breakfast, I'm starving,” he added.   
“Don't you have to be at the office in half an hour?”   
“It's fine if I'm a little late, there are no important appointments today. How about pancakes?”  
“Sounds great!” Hiki smiled excitedly.   
They stopped at a little café and afterwards, they drove home, kissed goodbye in the elevator and whilst Howl went straight to the office, Hiki went home to work off his chores. Howl had told him to rest, but he hadn’t done anything in days and since he already felt a little better, he wanted to at least do the bare necessities. The doctor had told him that, depending on the power of the impact on the ice, his tailbone and wrist would hurt for weeks or only days. He had been vague about it, but the painkillers did their deed and Hiki was able to move around better. He did the laundry, changed the sheets in the guest room, he did the dishes, cleaned the bathrooms and the kitchen, and he also dusted and mopped the floors. Even though he had to wear the cast, the cleaning went smoothly and his injuries weren’t much of a hindrance. “Ah… now I cleaned the whole condo after all… Howl will kill me.” He chuckled and immediately regretted overdoing it. Now that he realized he was done, he felt really tired all of a sudden. I didn’t sleep much either. It’s only 5, I have two hours ‘til he gets home. Guess I’m gonna go take a nap, he thought. He lied down on the sofa, wrapped himself in a blanket and fell asleep.   
“Hikkun… Hey, wake up.”  
Hiki felt something brushing against his cheek and opened his eyes. “Mhh… Howl? You’re early…” He rubbed his eyes as he slowly sat up. Howl was kneeling in front of the sofa.   
“I’m not, it’s almost 8. I’m actually late. There was something I had to d-”  
“EIGHT? B-But… Dang it, I didn’t even cook! I’ll get the food ready, give me half an hour!” He tried to get up, but Howl gently held him down. “No. Sit. Calm down. You don’t have to be so diligent. No need to have the food ready as soon as I come home from work. I appreciate your hard work, but please relax a little. Also, you cleaned the whole condo, didn’t you? I noticed when I came home and changed. Hikaru, you’re supposed to rest.” Howl scolded him.   
“I know, it just… kinda happened…”   
“You’re holding your wrist. It hurts, right? You clearly overdid it.”  
Hiki hadn’t even noticed, but Howl was right.   
“I’m really glad I made that decision. You need a break.”  
“What decision,” Hiki asked, looking up to his lover. Howl knelt back down, brushed a strand of hair behind Hiki’s ear and smiled.   
“The reason I’m late is that I called your father. We’re going to visit your family for the New Year’s holidays. We’re going to leave Tokyo on January 1st, and we’ll stay in Machida for three days. What do you say?”   
Hiki looked at him with his mouth open. “Are you serious?!”  
“Yes. We’re going to sleep in on the 1st, because of the New Year’s party at the office on the night before, and then we’ll leave for Machida. The office will be closed for nenmatsu nenshi* anyway, so we can have a little trip and you can see your family and relax.”  
Hiki smiled so widely, he felt like his face was going to break. He was too happy for words, so he just jumped Howl and flung his arms around his neck. The surprised Howl lost his balance and they fell down on the floor.   
“Wah, I’m sorry!” Hiki laughed. “I’m so happy, thank you Howl!”  
Howl chuckled and returned his lover’s embrace, while he was lying flat on his back with Hiki on him.

 


	11. New Year's Eve and a getaway

A couple of days later was the day of the big New Year's Eve party at Howl’s office.   
“Is there anything you need me to help you with,” Hiki asked after they had lunch while cleaning up the table. Howl had been busier than usual in the past few days with coordinating the caterers and the organization of the whole event. Usually, he had help from his assistants, but he wanted them to enjoy the party like everyone else without having to work.   
“No, it’s fine, Hikkun. But I’ll head down to the office again, I just got an email from the decorator, apparently, they brought the wrong decorations. Sorry for leaving you alone with this.” He got up and kissed Hiki goodbye.   
”Let me know if you need anything, okay,” he yelled after Howl, who didn’t reply because he was looking at his phone while he was leaving. Hiki sighed. He finished cleaning up and went to take a hot bath. After he had soaked in the tub for a while, he went to the dressing room, picked out his clothes for the party and placed them on the bed.   
“Hikkun?! Where are you?” He suddenly heard Howl’s voice calling out for him. “I’m in the bedroom! I just finished my ba-”  
“Ah, there you are!” Howl entered their bedroom, rushed over to Hiki and hugged him tightly.  
“Wah, Howl! Wait, I’m still in my bathrobe, you’ll get wet!”  
“It’s fine~” He sighed. “Just what I needed…”  
“Huh? What did you need? You’re so weird...”  
“You. I needed you to recharge before the party.” He tightened his embrace. Hiki returned his gesture.   
“There, there. Only a few more hours and you can rest,” he tried to comfort his stressed lover.  
“Haa… I wish we could just stay like this forever. Actually… I would like to throw you on the bed and ravish you to relieve some stress, but we don’t have the time and you’re still injured. What a pity.”  
“Lecher,” Hiki replied.   
“It's your fault that I'm like that.” He looked down to Hiki and the moment he opened his mouth to protest against his words, Howl kissed him and grinned when they parted.  
“Idiot,” Hiki pouted blushing.   
“I’m glad we’ll leave tomorrow. I need a break and a lot of Hikkun-time. Organizing this party all by myself always takes a toll on me. But luckily everything is done now and the party can start in an hour.”  
“You worked hard, you deserve a break. I would’ve helped you, you know?”  
“I know Hikkun, but this party is like a thank you to my employees from me personally. Sure, they get their bonuses, but that’s a company thing. This party is a personal gesture, just like the cookies you made for them on Christmas. They’re good people and I want them to know that they’re appreciated. That’s why it’s important to me to do everything by myself.”   
“I see. Yeah, I understand.”  
“Mmh… I should go and take a shower now… But you smell so good…” Howl buried his face in Hiki’s neck and sniffed him.   
“Are you going to start purring now,” Hiki teased him. “Wah!” He jolted as Howl suddenly bit his neck.   
“Wait, no no no no no! I know where this is leading and we can’t do that now, you just said there’s no time,” Hiki intervened and pushed Howl away. “Go take a shower and get dressed. I’m gonna get dressed too and wait for you in the living room,” he declared and walked away.   
“Hikkun, you’re so much stronger than me, I admire you,” Howl teasingly yelled after him.   
“If only you knew,” Hiki mumbled as he walked over to their walk-in closet, trying to calm down from his arousal, cursing Howl for always going after his weak spots. He got dressed in dark grey pants, a light pastel pink colored shirt and a grey sleeveless v-neck sweater. He was sitting in the living room, reading a light novel and relaxing a bit, when Howl walked in. He was wearing a dark blue suit with a black west, a light blue shirt and a dark blue tie with tiny black Christmas trees on it. Hiki closed his book and looked at his sparkling lover. “Uwah, Howl… you look so handsome…” He got up and walked over to him. “Your tie is a bit askew,” he noticed and gently fixed it. Then he looked up to Howl and smiled. “There you go. Now you’re perfect.” Howl leaned over and kissed him. “Let’s go down to the office and have a great time,” Hiki added.   
“It’s our first New Year's Eve together,” Howl mentioned as they put on their shoes.   
“Yeah… and my first party in general, I’ve never been to one before.”  
“Really? Alright, I’ll do my best to make it the best first party ever for you,” Howl smiled at Hiki.   
“So far you're very good at giving me the best first times,” Hiki winked and took Howl’s hand as they left their condo and walked to the elevator.   
“You know… I started throwing these parties for employees that didn’t have families so that they'd have a place to go to so they wouldn’t be lonely. But it was such a success that now most of my workers come and some of them also bring their kids. So… it’s going to be crowded, are you going to be okay with that many people,” he asked as they stepped into the lift. “You avoided big gatherings back at your parents’ house because you're uncomfortable with too many people around, right?”  
Hiki didn’t think about that before. He usually managed not to show it, but he was a very shy person and too many people at once were very intimidating and stressful to him.   
“Hikkun… your hand is getting sweaty…”  
“Ah, sorry!” He tried to withdraw his hand, but Howl tightened his grip.   
“It’s okay.” He leaned over, kissed Hiki on the lips and smiled. “Don’t worry, I'm here.”   
Hiki instantly felt at ease and more relaxed. He pressed Howl’s hand and smiled at him fondly. When the elevator door opened they got a warm welcome. Many of Howl’s employees were there already. It was noisy and crowded and pop music was playing in the background. Everyone was happy to see Howl and they greeted him affectionately as the two of them made their way through the big room to say hello to everyone. Not even for a second did Howl let go of Hiki’s hand. His grip stayed firm and reassuring.   
“Do you want something to drink,” he asked Hiki when they were done greeting everyone.   
“Yes, I’ll go and get a coke or something. Do you want anything too?”   
“White wine would be nice, but are you okay with-”  
“It’s fine, I’m okay. Don’t worry so much, have fun,” Hiki replied with a bright smile and left to look for the bar. Everyone was in a great mood. People were chatting, some were dancing, there was a big buffet with all sorts of foods…   
“Here you go,” he said as he handed Howl his glass of wine.   
“Thanks. Are you having fun?”  
“No, not really. It’s boring, there aren’t any good party drugs. Just alcohol, so lame.”  
Howl stared at Hiki in confusion.   
“Howl… I was joking, relax. I’m having fun, it’s all good,” he chuckled. Right when Howl wanted to reply, a loud voice interrupted him.   
“Junpei, stop running!” A couple, that apparently had just arrived, tried to call their little son to order. “Ah, Shachou, good evening. Thank you for inviting us, we’re happy to be here. Please excuse our little hurricane of a son,” the man bowed before Howl and laughed. Howl bowed as well.  
“Good to see you, Suzuki-san. Welcome. And your wife looks lovely as always.” He turned to the wife and bowed again. She blushed and thanked him. “And you have grown so much, Junpei-kun. I bet you’re shaving already. How old are you now?”   
The little boy was obviously happy and replied proudly: “N-Not yet, but I’m already six!”  
“Six? You look much older! Stay away from the bar, alright,” Howl joked and his parents laughed as little Junpei blushed. “There’s an area for the small grown-ups back there. We have a ball pit and other cool stuff, do you want to go and check it out,” Howl asked.   
The little boy’s eyes widened and started glowing in excitement. “YEAH!” He nodded eagerly.   
“I could take him there, if that’s okay for you,” Hiki offered.   
“Of course Ueda-kun, thank you,” the boy’s father answered. “Jun, go with Ueda-kun.”  
“Ehhh, dun wanna,” he protested.  
“Junpei-kun, this is Hikaru.” Howl knelt down to the little boy. “You must know, he’s a brave knight and he even saved a princess the other day. He will lead you to great adventures,” he promised. Junpei’s eyes widened again. He looked at Hiki in awe, took his hand and the both of them left. Hiki was happy. He felt much more comfortable around kids, so he wanted to use this opportunity to spend some time at the playroom, which originally was one of the big conference rooms. The desks and seats had been removed and replaced with a big ball pit, a small slide, a little area where the kids could draw and paint pictures, there were dolls, cars, balloons, and other toys.   
“Whoa…” Hiki was surprised at that sight. Junpei let go of his hand, ran off and dove straight into the ball pit.   
“I know right? That’s our Shachou for you. He does it every year and I think he adds more and more toys to make sure the kids aren’t getting bored. That way their parents can have a good time, knowing that their kids are having fun as well. I know he seems grumpy, but he’s actually very kind,” a woman standing next to the door started babbling. She must have been in her mid 20’s and Hiki was a bit surprised about her chattiness. “I also have the feeling that there are more and more kids every year. I counted 23 earlier, jeez. Oh by the way, I’m Tanaka Fumiko, I work in field service, but today I’m a nanny,” she twaddled and laughed at her own joke. “And you are?”   
“I-I’m Ueda Hikaru, nice to meet you,” Hiki smiled.  
“Hmm… do you work here? I think I’ve never seen you before. But then again, I’m rarely at my desk and more at client’s offices, hehe.”  
“Ah, no… I’m… well, your Shachou and I… We’re… umm…” Hiki didn’t exactly know how to phrase it. He never had to introduce himself as Howl’s lover before.  
“Ueda-kun and I are partners.” Howl had appeared behind Hiki and placed his hand on his shoulder. Hiki jolted. Did he hear him struggling a moment ago? Did he think Hiki wasn’t sure what they were to each other? His heart was throbbing.  
“Oh, Shachou, good evening! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be indiscreet.” She blushed.   
“It’s fine, Tanaka-san, it’s not a secret. Will you excuse us for a moment please?”   
“Sure! I’ll go and see if the kids need anything.” She smiled and left.   
“I’m sorry, Howl... I didn’t know how to call it without sounding inappropriate. I mean we’re partners… companions... a couple… lovers… s-soul m- MH...! Howl, wh-...”  
“Sorry, Hikkun. The urge to kiss you was too strong, you’re just too cute.”   
Hiki blushed. “You’re weird…”   
“I actually just wanted to ask you if you want to stay at the kids room. You probably feel more comfortable here, right? So stay if you like.” Howl sighed. “I would love to spend the night with you snuggled up on the couch, having some snacks and good wine…”  
“Hmm, that would be nice, but you should go back, they probably miss you already. Your employees really revere you. I will stay here and help Tanaka-san with the kids. Don’t drink too much, okay?” Hiki straightened Howl’s tie, even though there was nothing wrong with it, then looked up to him and smiled. Howl touched Hiki’s chin, bent over, kissed him softly and walked away sighing. Hiki also sighed lovestruck and returned to the kids room.  
“There’s the princess I told you about!” He suddenly heard little Junpei’s voice yelling. He came running to Hiki with a cloud of kids following him. “Shachou-san said that he’s a princess! A real princess!” The kids stared at Hiki and made sounds of amazement.   
“Ah, Junpei-kun, I think you didn’t get that ri-”  
“Princess, can we braid your hair please,” a little girl asked.  
“Yes, we want to braid your hair!” Another girl joined in.   
“The girls will make you pretty and us boys will fight off dragons to protect you!” Junpei shouted eagerly. Hiki sighed. There was no use in arguing with them, so he gave in.   
He had a lot of fun playing with the kids and they were very fond of Hiki. The boys ran around with foam swords, fighting off imaginary dragons and beasts and the girls made a purple cardboard crown for him. Hiki had a great time.

“Where’s Ueda-kun,” Howl asked Tanaka when he saw her walking by a while after he had left Hiki.  
“The kids got sleepy, so he went to the nappy corner with them. Their parents picked them up one after another, but he didn’t come back. I figured he was sleeping as well, so I let him. The kids were all over him the whole time, he must be tired...” she explained.   
“Thank you for your hard work, Tanaka-san.”  
“It was fun. Especially after Ueda-kun joined us, the kids really adored him. If he’s there again next year, I don’t mind being the nanny of the night again,” she smiled.   
“He will be there for sure,” Howl replied and went back to the kids room. Howl had laid out some mattresses on the floor in the office right next to it. He had also prepared pillows and blankets in case kids would get sleepy, so they could take a nap. He found Hiki lying on a mattress, arms and legs spread out widely, still wearing his cardboard crown. He chuckled lovingly at that sight. Then he pulled his phone out of his pocket and took a picture. “Set as… background,” he whispered. He knelt down, caressed his lover’s cheek and kissed him softly on his lips. “Wake up, Sleeping Beauty. It’s almost midnight, let’s start the new year together…”   
“Mmh…” Hiki woke up and rubbed his eyes. “Did I fall asleep? Oh my… I had so much fun with the little ones, but it was quite exhausting, I guess. How was your night? Did you have fun at the party?”  
“It was okay. I missed you.” Howl leaned over and kissed him again. Their soft pecking quickly turned into a sensual deep kiss as Howl’s hand slipped underneath Hiki’s sweater and aimed straight for his lover's perky nipple.   
“Mh… ah, Howl wait… mhh haa… what if someone walks in on us…”   
“I locked the door, don’t worry…” he whispered and started kissing Hiki’s neck when suddenly two dulled female voices from outside interrupted them.  
“Have you seen Shachou? It’s almost midnight, everyone is gathering for the countdown...”   
“No, I haven’t, but maybe he’s in the bathroom. Let’s go to the others and wait for him.”  
“Didn’t he want to look for his cute little boyfriend? Maybe they’re hiding somewhere to make out, hihi.”  
“Stop that, it’s our boss you’re talking about, how inappropriate. But I wonder too!” The girls giggled as they walked away.   
Hiki and Howl looked at each other and both of them started laughing. Then, Howl sighed loudly and sat up.   
“We should head back…” Hiki huffed as he got up as well.   
“I know, I know,” Howl agreed frustrated. Hiki touched Howl’s chin and gently guided it into his direction. He fixed his lover’s tousled hair and smiled at him. “Perfect.”  
Howl leaned over and placed one last kiss on Hiki’s lips. “Let’s go.” He helped Hiki up, they straightened their clothes and went back to the others.   
Big parties and countdowns weren’t usually Japanese customs for New Year's Eve, but ever since the first party, the countdown had become a regular tradition everyone enjoyed. Ten seconds before midnight everyone started counting down from ten to one and at midnight they threw confetti and wished each other a happy new year. Fifteen minutes later Howl took Hiki's hand and dragged him to the elevator.   
“Are we leaving,” he asked surprised.  
“Yes.”  
“B-But the party… Won't they miss you?”  
“They'll be fine. I asked Higarashi-san to lock the office when it's over. She's always the last one to leave anyway. I've had enough for today, I want to be alone with you now. How's your back,” Howl asked as he pushed up his glasses with one finger.   
“I-It's fine. Doesn't hurt much…” Hiki blushed, knowing why Howl had asked.   
“Good.” As soon as the door had closed, Howl pushed him against the big mirror at the back and started kissing him greedily. Hiki felt a bit appalled, but he didn’t even think about struggling. He wanted Howl just as badly. When they’d reached their floor, they made their way into the condo and to the bedroom, stumbling while undressing each other in between their rousing kisses and luscious huffing. They indulged in their steamy lust until the break of dawn.   
“Enough, I can’t anymore.” The exhausted Hiki slumped down on the sheets, huffing and puffing.  
“Does your back hurt?”   
“Mh mh, I’m fine. Just… how often did I cum? I don’t even know…” He turned his head and looked out of the panorama window. “Ah… Howl… look… Hatsuhinode. The first sunrise of the year…” he mumbled as he started drifting off. “It’s… beautiful isn’t it…” And with that, he had fallen asleep.   
Howl looked at his lover, who was covered in the glowing orange light that sparkled on his sweaty skin. “Yeah… absolutely beautiful…” He smiled, snuggled up to Hiki and watched him sleep for a while. Then he got up to pack their bags for their trip to Machida. Hiki had done some of the packing already, but Howl wanted to finish up so they could leave right after Hiki had rested a bit. They didn’t plan to stay up until sunrise, they actually wanted to leave Tokyo around ten in the morning. The plan was to arrive there around noon for lunch and since Hiki's family wanted to visit the shrine, he had to stay with their schedule, which meant only a few hours of sleep for Hiki and no sleep at all for him. Which was fine for Howl. Totally worth it, he thought. He packed their bags and made breakfast bento they could eat in the car. Then, he took a shower and went down to the office to see if everything was okay. The office was a mess, but he expected a cleaning crew on the 5th, the day before his employees came back to work. His secretary Higarashi had taken good care of everything, it seemed. He nodded contentedly and went back upstairs to wake up Hiki.

“Hikkun… Wake up, we have to leave soon.” He sat on Hiki’s side of the bed and caressed his cheek.   
“Howl? What time is it?” He stretched out and yawned. His body felt sore, but he was relaxed and happy.   
“It’s 9 in the morning. Sorry, you only had two hours to sleep, but we’ll have to leave in an hour. Remember, your father invited us for Hatsumode.”  
“Right, the first shrine visit of the year. I’m so looking forward to it. I’ll go and take a quick shower,” Hiki said and sat up. “Ugh…” He flinched.   
“Hikkun, are you okay? We overdid it again, huh?”  
“I’m fine and… it was… really good.” He smirked. Howl kissed him softly.   
“It was,” he said with a low voice. Hiki blushed.   
“I-I’ll head to the shower now.”  
“Alright. I’ll take a look around to see if I didn’t forget to pack anything and rest a little,” Howl said as he got up and walked over to the door.   
“You packed? Did you even sleep at all?” But Howl had already left the bedroom, so he didn't get an answer. Hiki clicked his tongue. After all the organizing, the party itself and their exhausting…night, plus packing and everything, Howl must have been really fatigued. He sighed and went to the bathroom. When he was ready, he walked over to the living room and found Howl sitting on the sofa, sound asleep. Hiki frowned. He didn’t want to wake him up, but Howl would get super angry at him if he wouldn’t.   
“Howl… wake up…” He leaned over and caressed his cheek like Howl always did. Suddenly Howl took his hand and kissed it.  
“Wah!” Hiki jolted.   
“Sorry. I wasn’t sleeping, but thank you for waking me up so gently, that was really cute.” He smiled.   
“I-I just did what you always do,” Hiki answered flustered. “Come on now, we gotta leave.” He walked ahead to take one of the two bags.   
“Hikkun, are you limping again?”   
“Huh?! No, I’m not!” Hiki had tried to hide it, but the past night had worsened the state of his bruised tailbone again.   
“Okay, that means we're on a sex break. Well, not like we can do much while we're at your parents’ house anyway.” He got up, walked over to Hiki, kissed him on the head and grabbed both bags. “Let's go.”  
Hiki nodded gloomily and they left.  
Unfortunately, there was traffic, so they got stuck for a while, but that gave them the opportunity to eat Howl's breakfast bento. Hiki kept forgetting what an excellent cook Howl was. He texted his brother Hajime their expected time of arrival after the traffic had gotten better, and as they drove up to the house he could already see him and his best friend Kaito waiting for them.   
He got out of the car the moment it stopped and walked over to them as fast as he could. “Hacchan, Kaito!” He smiled broadly.   
“Nii-chan, welcome home!”  
“Hey, Hiki! So good to see you!”  
They greeted each other while Howl took the bags out of the trunk and joined the cheerful boys.   
“Ah, Howl! I'm sorry for leaving you behind, how rude of me…” Hiki apologized.  
“It's alright, Hikkun. You haven't seen each other in a while after all. Hello Hajime and Kaito. How are you?”  
“We’re fine, but Niichan, what about you? Is that a cast?” Hajime asked surprised.   
“Hikkun, you didn’t tell them?”  
“No, I didn’t want to make them worry. Ouch! Hey, Kaito, what was that for?”  
“Idiot. You’re Hacchan’s brother and my best friend since Kindergarten. We’re practically brothers too. You should tell us stuff like this! Howl-san, what happened?” Kaito, who had just hit Hiki on the back of his head, replied.   
“Maybe we should go inside to talk,” Hajime suggested. “It’s pretty cold out here and there are cookies inside, hehe.”   
Everyone agreed and they moved inside. Kaito and Hajime lead them to the traditional lounge. They had actually two in the house. The modern one had big white sofas and armchairs, a huge flat screen TV, a modern bar and white carpets. The room they had just entered was a traditional tatami room. The white wall panels were framed with dark wooden beams and the floor, like in most of the rooms, were laid-out with tatami mats.  
The sitting area contained a long chabudai, a short-legged table, with six floor chairs called zaisu. In the back of the room was a big Kotatsu fitting for six people as well.   
“Ohh, they put up the Kotatsu already!” Hiki shouted excited. “I always loved sitting there, it’s so warm and cozy. But I didn’t get to use it often, because most of the time there were too many kyoudai around and I felt awkward sitting together with them.” He blushed.  
“Wanna sit at the kotatsu then, Hiki?” Kaito asked.  
“No, I think I would fall asleep in an instant. Let’s just sit at the normal table.”   
“Yeah, you always preferred to stay in your room. You were kind of a loner,” Hajime chuckled.  
“Because there were always so many people around. People I didn’t know, and they looked... scary…”   
“I guess that’s what you get when your father is the Oyabun of a clan, huh…” Kaito said as they sat down. Hajime and Kaito took the seats right across from Hiki and Howl.  
“Ouch.” Hiki flinched. Howl put his hand on Hiki’s shoulder.  
“Are you okay with sitting on the floor, Hikkun,” he asked worriedly.  
“Yeah. The zaisu are cushioned, after all, I just made a wrong movement.” Hiki smiled.  
“Okay, what exactly happened to you? Spill,” Kaito demanded.  
“Nothing major. We went ice skating and I fell, that’s all.”  
“Sounds just like you…” Kaito observed.   
“Yeah, Niichan, you really are a bit on the clumsy side. Ice skating probably isn’t something you should do, hehe.” Hajime added.   
“You’re probably right, hehe.” He agreed, smiling half-heartedly upon those unpleasant memories.   
“That’s not what happened, though. He was actually very good. He’s a quick learner and managed to skate without falling even once. The truth is that someone pushed him.” Howl corrected him. He didn’t like that his lover made himself look bad.   
“Someone pushed you, Niichan?! What a dick!”   
“Well, I accidentally crashed into him because someone crossed my path and I couldn’t break and... while I was trying to regain my balance I clung onto him. He didn’t like that, so he pushed me away and I fell.” Hiki explained.   
“He bruised his wrist and his butt,” Howl added.   
“I bruised my tailbone. But it’s gotten better already. My wrist too. I have a doctor’s appointment next week and I’m sure he’ll take off the cast.” Hiki said.  
“What an asshole! I hope Howl-san kicked his butt!” Hajime punched the air.   
“I told you last time, just Howl is fine. Well, I wanted to, but your brother didn’t let me.”  
“Hiki, you could’ve easily kicked his butt yourself, I remember that you were pretty skilled at martial arts when we were kids,” Kaito added.  
“Have we met before? You should all know how much I despise violence...”  
“Yeah, that’s why Niichan convinced our father to allow him to stop with the martial arts lessons. You fought hard for that, I really admired you. Though afterwards you told me that you almost wet yourself when you confronted him.” They laughed.  
“Father can be really scary, you know that. I thought he might beat me for speaking up, but I was lucky, he was in a good mood,” Hiki chuckled. “Oh, talking about him, is he back already? When are we leaving for hatsumode?”  
“Around four,” Hajime answered. “Father usually keeps it as a family thing. No outsiders allowed. The fact that you’re allowed to join us must mean that he really likes you, Howl. Well, you brought my brother back for the new years holidays, he probably appreciates that a lot.” He smiled.   
“Howl, have you met their mother before,” Kaito asked unexpectedly and Hiki went pale.   
“Uhm… No, not yet,” Howl answered, appalled by Hiki’s reaction.  
“I was so excited to see you two again that I completely forgot about her...” Hiki mumbled.  
“Hajime, Kaito, would you excuse us? We have to unpack and get ready, and we had a long night at my office parts. I’d like to rest a little before we leave,” Howl suddenly said.  
“Oh yeah sure,” Hajime answered. “I’ll bring you upstairs.”   
Howl got up first and wanted to help Hiki when suddenly a tall bald man in a black suit entered the room.   
“Welcome home, Hikaru-sama.” He bowed.   
“Ah, h-hello Kitamura-san.” Hiki greeted him as Howl helped him to get up.   
”You’re leaving already? I just wanted to offer tea.”   
“Yes, we have to unpack. Thank you for your hospitality, though.” Hiki replied politely.  
“Oh well, that’s my job, isn’t it. Well then, have a pleasant stay.” He bowed again and left.   
“Who was that?” Howl asked.   
“Kitamura is something like our father’s gofer,” Hajime explained.   
“He’s scary,” Hiki added.   
“Well, everyone’s scary to you,” his brother giggled.  
“Once I saw him beating up someone because he spilled some tea. He is scary, okay?” Hiki frowned.   
“He probably had a bad day,” Kaito joked.   
“Let’s go upstairs now,” Howl said. He took their bags, they left the lounge, followed a long hallway and walked up the stairs. At the end of the staircase was another long hallway seamed with seven doors. Three on the left, three on the right, and one at the end of the hallway.  
“This is your room, Howl,” Hajime pointed at the first door on the right. “Niichan’s room is the last one straight ahead. My room is right across from yours and the room on the left of Niichan’s is the room of our Oniisan,” he explained. “Our parents’ bedroom is in the other wing of the house, but he posts guards downstairs, so no sneaking around at night, hehe, sorry.”  
“Wait, Howl is not going to stay in my room,” Hiki asked appalled.   
“No, father had this room prepared for him. Did you think he would let you two stay together in the same room overnight? Haha, Niichan, you’re so naive!”  
Hiki didn’t know what to answer, because now that he thought about it, it seemed logical, but he was so used to having Howl by his side, that it hadn’t even crossed his mind.  
“Thank you, Hajime. We’ll go to your brother’s room for now.” Howl took Hiki’s hand and dragged him along. “Let’s continue our talk later.”  
“S-Sure, rest a little,” Hajime answered and he and Kaito went to his room.

As soon as the door had closed behind them, Howl dropped their luggage, pulled Hiki closer and embraced him. That was exactly what Hiki needed in that moment. He returned Howl’s hug without saying anything and they remained in silence for a few minutes.  
Then, Hiki loosened his grip around his lover’s waist and looked up to him with a sad expression. “We can’t spend the nights together!”  
“I know. That was to be expected.” He sighed. “But I’m only at the end of the hallway and we have our phones, so we can text until we fall asleep.” He smiled and gently ran his fingers through Hiki’s hair to brush it behind his ear and kissed him.   
Hiki nodded. “And it’s only two nights after all.” He sighed too and after they parted he took his bag to unpack it. “We have two hours left before we leave. My father should be back from paying his respects to his parents’ grave soon.”  
“What about your mother?”   
“She stays in her room most of the time. She won't come to the shrine with us, but she'll be at the feast afterwards. I was so excited to see Hajime and Kaito… I didn't think about her…” Hiki looked worried, but Howl didn't want to pester him by asking too many questions. He walked over to him and hugged him from behind.  
“I’m not sure if it was a good idea to come…”   
That comment startled Hiki.  
“I'll go to my room and unpack too. Are you going to be okay,” Howl asked him.  
“Y-Yeah.” He smiled. “Oh, the bathroom is the second door on the right, by the way.”  
“Alright. See you in a minute. I'll come back once I'm done.” He kissed Hiki on the head, took his bag and left. Hiki sighed and sat down on his bed. He looked around in his old room. He had never really felt at home there, and now that he enjoyed his new life with Howl so much, he did even less. The room was still in the same state as he'd left it. It was a pretty small room, but it was enough space for Hiki. There was his bed, some book shelves and his desk. He also had a small flat screen tv, but he had rarely used it. He got up and walked over to the window. He looked outside at the mountains in the distance. That was his favorite part of his room. The view was great. He thought about his mother and sister and about having to spend the nights without Howl, and suddenly he felt the strong urge to drive back home to Tokyo. “Haa… I need to pull myself together. Howl went out of his way to call father and to come here on his days off just so I get to spend time with Hajime and Kaito. I need to stop with these negative feelings,” he said to himself. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. “Where did my optimism go? Everything will be fine. Mother won't drink today.” He went back to unpack his bag. Suddenly someone knocked and his door opened.   
“Hikkun, Hajime just told me that your father is back. We should go down and greet him.”  
“Oh, yeah, sure. Coming.”  
They went downstairs, over to Yasuhiro’s office. They knocked on the door and Kitamura opened it.   
“Hikaru-sama, your father is awaiting you. Please don’t cause him any trouble today.” He glared at Hiki and opened the door wider so the two of them could enter.   
“Sure.” Hiki replied and then turned to Howl and whispered: “See, he’s scary…”   
Howl smiled and put his hand on Hiki’s shoulder as they walked over to the big desk.   
“Hikaru, Howl-san. What a pleasure to see you. It’s been a while. Please, sit.” Yasuhiro greeted them in his usual friendly but cold manner. “I was surprised about your call, Howl-san, but I appreciate that you brought my son back for the New Years celebrations. How are you doing, Hikaru? How’s Uni going?”  
“I’m fine, father. I think I'm doing good. Mostly A’s and B’s.” Hiki answered stiff.   
“B’s, hm? I see…” he said with a disapproving expression. “And how’s business going, Howl-san?”   
Hiki didn’t seem like his father’s comment on his grades bothered him much, but Howl was angry. He swallowed and replied: “Business is going great, thank you. I hope you’re doing well too.” For Hiki’s sake, he didn’t want to start a fight.   
“Well, I can’t complain. If you’ll excuse me now, I will have to get ready for the shrine visit.” He got up and so did Hiki and Howl. The two of them spent the next hour waiting at the lounge for everyone to gather. There were several Yakuza members, probably Yasuhiro’s most important underlings. After a while, Hiki’s sister Harumi, her husband and daughter entered the room. They greeted Hiki and Howl formally, but the only one who smiled at them was Harumi’s husband. It was Howl’s first time meeting Hiki’s sister. She was cold as ice and seemed to have no interest in talking to them at all. Finally, Yasuhiro arrived as well with Hiki’s eldest brother Hiroki by his side. Everyone was there, so they left for the shrine.   
Several black cars drove to the shrine like in a caravan. When they arrived at the old, sacred building, it wasn’t very crowded because it wasn’t located in a public area. Hiki had explained that the Ueda family went there as a tradition for many decades now because that shrine was a little hidden and more private. They did their prayers and in the end, they got Omikuji as well. Little paper rolls that tell people their fortune for the next year.   
“What did you get,” Hajime asked his brother excited.  
“It says Kichi,” Hiki answered startled.  
“Whoa, Niichan, you got ‘Good Luck’? That’s the first time, you usually draw bad luck, nice!”   
Hiki looked at his scroll and read his prediction for “Love”. He folded it, put it into his pocket, looked at Howl and smiled.   
“What is it,” Howl asked.   
“Nothing... What did you get?”   
Howl opened his scroll, read it and put it away.   
“So?”   
“Later.”   
“Come on, tell me~”  
“I’ll tell you when we’re back in your room.”  
“What? But we’ll have dinner after this, that will take forever,” Hiki whined.   
“Patience is a virtue, Hikkun.”  
“Tche.” Hiki pouted. Howl took a quick look around to make sure no one was looking and kissed him. Hiki blushed and touched his lips flustered.   
“Wh-”  
“It’s fine, no one saw.” Howl winked and they caught up to the others. The whole time Hiki would’ve loved to hold Howl’s hand and he knew that Howl would’ve loved that, but he didn’t dare to do that with his father and so many kyoudai around. He couldn’t wait to finally be alone with his lover.

 


	12. Family Dinner

When everyone was done with their prayers and had gotten their oracles, the group walked back to the cars and drove home. They entered the big dining room where the table was already set. Yasuhiro sat down at the end of it. Hiroki, his first lieutenant, sat on his left and next to Hiroki was their second lieutenant Yamaguchi and then Kitamura. The seat on Yasuhiro’s right was empty, but it was followed by Harumi and her husband. Their nanny was taking care of their little daughter and had brought her home. Hajime was sitting next to Kitamura, followed by Howl. Hiki sat right across from Howl, next to Harumi’s husband. [I'm gonna add a fucking picture istg]   
“Hajime, go ask your mother to join us,” Yasuhiro ordered his youngest son. Hajime nodded diligently and left.   
“It smells really good,” Howl said to Hiki, but his lover didn’t get the chance to answer, because his father interfered.   
“My chef has two Michelin stars, Howl-san. I hope you will enjoy the meal she has prepared for us. You look like someone who appreciates high-class meals.”   
“I do, indeed. You know, your son is an excellent cook. But I’m looking forward to what your chef will serve us as well. Thank you for having me.” Howl replied and smiled at Hiki, who blushed. He was happy that Howl had praised his cooking in front of his family.   
“Ueda-dono, would you like some wine,” a servant asked Yasuhiro and distracted him from their conversation. Suddenly the door opened and Hajime walked in with an earnest face. Howl had never seen him like that before. He sat back down on his chair, leaned over to Hiki and Howl overheard him whispering: “She drank, so stay quiet and don’t draw her attention to you.”  
He noticed that Hiki became very tense. Then, his mother entered the room and everyone who was chatting until then became quiet.   
“Well, here we are again, aren’t we. Another year passed and everyone got older. Except for me, of course.” She cackled. “And the ones that aren't amongst us anymore that is.” She was obviously drunk. Howl watched Hiki, but he just sat there and stared down on the table, his hands placed on his lap… He looked like a little kid that got scolded for something that wasn’t his fault. Howl's heart throbbed.   
“Why don’t you sit down, dear,” Yasuhiro indirectly ordered her. She clicked her tongue but did as she was told and staggered over to her seat, supported by a maid. Normally Howl would’ve introduced himself, but he stayed silent for Hiki’s sake, since he overheard Hajime telling him to not draw any attention to him. Instead, he moved his foot forward and felt for Hiki’s. When their feet touched, Hiki raised his head and looked at him in surprise. Howl smiled warmly as if he wanted to say “Just a little reminder that I’m here with you. You’re not alone”, and he was sure that Hiki understood. Hiki returned Howl’s smile, but he looked anxious and tense.   
Yasuhiro waved at one of the servants as a sign to bring in the food, and they started with the first course. They all enjoyed the festive meal. The first course was Miso soup with mussels, the second course was tofu with crab sauce, for the third course they had Chirashi Sushi, the main course contained miso-glazed black cod with sauteed broccoli, and in the end, they got served Yuzu Creme Brulées. Everyone had a good time and the mood was fairly relaxed. Howl glanced over to Hiki’s mother from time to time. She seemed completely indifferent and not interested in talking to her family members. Her glass of wine seemed more important to her, but every time Harumi talked to her, she had a smile on her face. That expression made Howl notice how much Hiki’s face resembled hers. He was actually the only one who looked like her. Harumi and Hiroki had brown hair and although Hajime had the same hair color as Hiki and their mother, all their faces resembled Yasuhiro’s. Hiki had his mother’s rose blonde hair, the same face shape, the same eyes, the same nose, and he even had a mole at the same place as her. But the difference between them was that Hiki’s smiles were honest and full of heart, and he always had a warm expression on his face when he talked to the people he liked. Her smile looked fake. She looked cold and distant and it was obvious that she put up an act.   
Although his mother stayed mostly silent and only glared at him from time to time, Hiki barely ate anything and didn’t talk, which Howl was aware of since he watched over his lover the whole time. He kept peeking at the watch on the wall and just wanted dinner to be over so he could go to his room with Howl.  
“It was delicious, Ueda-san, thanks for the meal,” Howl suddenly complimented Hiki’s father as the servants cleaned the table after dessert.   
“I told you, Howl-san. My chef is-...” Yasuhiro started, but his wife interrupted him and Howl immediately regretted to have said something.   
“Howl? Hmm... I’ve heard about that one. Isn’t that the homo that made that other kid gay?”   
Hiki's heart throbbed and he glanced at Howl, but he looked calm and collected. Of course, such a low comment wouldn't faze him. Hiki was a little relieved.   
“Kimiko dear, please don’t.” Yasuhiro glared at her, but that only seemed to fuel her.  
“Isn’t it rude of you to eat our food without introducing yourself to me properly first,” she added.  
“Mother, please,” Hiroki tried to stop her as well.  
“You’re a foreigner right? And you’re pretty wealthy from what I’ve heard. Yasu mentioned that you run your own successful company.”  
“I’m sorry for not introducing myself earlier. My name is Harada Howl. I’m actually half Japanese, half British, and yes, I run my own IT company.” Howl answered politely, but without faked friendliness. He didn’t want to cause trouble for Hiki, so he tried to behave, but after everything he’d heard about her, he would’ve preferred not to talk to her at all. Hiki noticed that cold tone in Howl’s voice and it made him worry. His mother obviously got to him after all.   
“Hmm, I see… You're rich, smart and good looking. So what exactly do you want with that worthless kid then? He causes nothing but troubles and worries for everyone. We should’ve sent him to an orphanage if you ask me, but they would probably refuse to take him in anyway. He's absolutely useless and nothing but a pain in the-”  
“Kimiko!” Yasuhiro interrupted her. She chuckled and took a sip of wine. Hiki's heart was racing. He hoped it would be over soon… he hoped she would just stop saying those things to the person he loved. He knew Howl loved him, but there was this irrational fear that he'd believe her. Because when he was little, at one point he started to believe his mother’s words too. Hiki’s thoughts were all over the place. Howl, who of course noticed his lover’s distress, slowly got up from his chair and turned to Kimiko.   
“Your son is the best thing that ever happened to me. I owe him all my happiness and I think that he’s an enrichment to the lives of everyone who’s lucky enough to meet him. I’m grateful for every minute I can spend with him and I hope that he will never get tired of me. And even if he wanted to leave me, I wouldn’t let him go, because I refuse to live another day without him by my side,” Howl said with a firm voice. Kimiko’s eyes widened in shock upon Howl’s bluntness. Everyone was staring at him. Some in awe, some with despise.   
“How dare you talk to me like that,” she hissed.   
“I’m sorry for being impolite, but I wanted to give an honest answer.” He knew that talking to a yakuza wife like that was not the best idea, but at that point, he didn’t care anymore. Kimiko stayed silent for a moment and then sighed loudly and leaned back on her chair. “You know what? I’ll forgive you, good-looking. That damn kid knows how to manipulate others with his cutesie behavior after all. ‘Oh look at me, I'm so cute and weak and helpless, protect me.’ Disgusting. That’s why my poor Satoshi was so fond of him, and now he's dead.” She took her glass and glared at Hiki. “You should ditch him and run as fast and as far as you can or you might end up dead too.”   
“Kimiko!” Yasuhiro slammed his fist on the table. “It's enough already!”   
With a malicious and satisfied grin, she took a sip from her wine.   
“You're right, mother,” Harumi agreed with her and immediately got scolded by her brothers. Howl was raging, but he knew that if he would start a fight now it would only make things worse for Hiki. And they still needed Yasuhiro’s consent to live together since Hiki was still underage. He knew his father was on their side, but he didn’t want to risk anything, so he kept his mouth shut. Whilst Hiroki and Hajime were arguing with their sister, he looked over to his lover and when he saw that dolorous expression on his face, he knew he had to act. “I agree... It's enough indeed,” he growled loud enough to interrupt the arguing. Everyone fell silent and looked at him again.   
“I’m sorry, I don’t want to be disrespectful, Ueda-san, but would you please excuse us? I don't feel well and I would like to retreat. I can’t hold my liquor very well and I think I had too much wine tonight,” he addressed Yasuhiro and glared at Hiki’s mother. Yasuhiro couldn’t help but smirk at Howl’s semi-subtle side blow. He nodded in consent. The two men weren't very fond of each other, but they respected one another and they shared one important thing, and that was the love for Hiki and the urge to protect him. Howl walked around the table over to his lover, placed one hand on his shoulder and said in a soft voice: “Let's leave, Hikkun.” Hiki nodded, got up and they walked over to the door. But Kimiko didn't let them go without one last comment she yelled after them.   
“Yeah, you better leave! Disgusting homos!”  
Hiki flinched as Howl shut the door behind them.   
“Howl, I'm s-” He started but Howl suddenly grabbed his hand and rushed down the hallway, dragging his lover along. Against Hiki’s expectation, they didn’t go to his room. Howl lead him to the front door, grabbed their coats and walked outside over to the car. Howl opened the door for the confused Hiki, they got in and drove for what felt like an eternity until Hiki finally asked: “Howl… where are we going?”  
“Away,” was all he said. Hiki decided to leave it at that and looked out of the window into the darkness. Howl was so full of rage, he knew he should’ve talked more to Hiki, he knew that his lover wasn’t in a good place mentally, but he needed to calm down first. He stopped the car at the edge of a forest in the middle of nowhere, out and walked a few steps. Hiki was able to see him well thanks to the headlights. Howl bent over and picked something up from the ground. It was a big branch from the tree that was standing a few meters away from the car. Suddenly, Howl swung the branch and slammed it against the tree in full throttle, again and again, and again. Hiki was startled. He had never seen him so angry. He wasn’t sure what to do, so he decided to give him some space and wait for a bit. Howl beat on that tree for a few minutes and when he was done, he threw the branch away and just stood there, catching his breath. All of a sudden Hiki started to feel very uneasy and nervous as the words of his mother echoed inside his head. Those bad feelings and the anxiety from before came back and this time they were overwhelmingly strong. He opened the door, rushed over to Howl and started talking with a shaky voice. “Howl... are you okay…?”   
Howl turned to him and narrowed his eyebrows in worry upon his lover’s troubled expression. “Hikkun, wha-”  
“P-Please don’t change your mind about me after what she said... Please don’t listen to her, please break up with me, please... don’t leave me… I wouldn’t know what to do without you. The mere thought of not being with you anymore…” He teared up. “I might be useless and worthless, but I’ll try to be better, I promise! So please let me stay with you,” he sobbed while clinging onto Howl’s jacket sleeve with one hand. Howl was shocked by his words. There was that little boy from earlier again.   
“What the hell… Hikaru, are you an idiot?”  
Hiki flinched. Howl clicked his tongue, touched his lover’s chin and gently lifted his head so he was able to look into his teary eyes. “Hikkun, did you hear anything I said during dinner? Did any of my words reach you at all? Please listen to me closely now, okay? I love you! I love you eternally! I won’t leave you and I won’t let you leave me. Ever. We belong together and nothing and no one will ever be able to tear us apart.” He desperately wanted Hiki to understand how much he was loved and needed. “I can’t stand it when you’re hurting. Your mother obviously traumatized you when you were a kid and I think you don’t even realize yourself how much. She’s a horrible person and it should be obvious that I don’t believe a single word that comes out of her mouth… and you shouldn’t either. She’s just trying to poison you. But it’s okay, because now I’m here to protect you, and no matter how often you need me to reassure you, I will say it a billion times. I will scream it into the world if I have to…” Howl let go of Hiki’s chin. He turned around, took a deep breath, placed his hands next to his mouth and yelled: “I LOVE YOU UEDA HIKARU AND I NEED YOU LIKE OXYGEN! YOU MEAN THE WORLD TO ME AND A DAY WITHOUT YOU ISN’T WORTH LIVING!” His voice echoed in the forest and some birds flew up.  
“You’re so silly,” Hiki giggled and wiped his wet face with the sleeves of his jacket. “Got it.”  
“Good. And I’m glad to see you smile again.” Howl replied with a soft voice, took Hiki’s face with both hands and kissed him before embracing him again.  
“You should think more highly of yourself, Hikkun. I wish you could see yourself with my eyes.” He sighed. “That woman kinda reminds me of my own mother, you know… That made it even worse. Sorry for my outburst, but I had to relieve that anger, it felt suffocating. You don’t deserve to be treated like that. What happened back then wasn’t your fault and you’re not how she depicts you at all. Please don’t let that woman poison your mind.”  
Hiki sniffled and nodded softly. “Normally her words don’t get to me that much anymore, but the fact that you heard all that… I don’t know, those old feelings just sneaked up and I felt so scared all of a sudden... Scared that you might believe her. But… in the end, I’m glad you were there with me, although I’m sorry that what happened riled you up that much. And I’m sorry for the things I said. It’s not like I seriously doubt your feelings for me.”   
“Everything was just a little too much. We’re both sleep deprived and this was a very, very long day. But I hope you know that I will always be there, Hikkun.”   
Hiki tightened his grip around Howl’s chest. “Are you okay? Because of your own mother, I mean...”  
Howl chuckled. “I am, Hikkun. As long as I have you everything will be okay.” He placed his big warm hand on Hiki’s head and they stayed like that for a moment. Hiki now felt secure and at ease. When he was in Howl’s arms it felt like nothing else but them existed.   
“I love you, Howl. You’re my everything and I also will always be there for you.” He wasn’t as good with words as his lover, but he had no doubt that Howl knew that he felt the same way about him as he did. An icy breeze rustled through the trees.   
“Let’s get back into the car, it’s getting colder.”  
Hiki nodded. “Yeah, we should head back, I guess.”  
“Well, we don’t have to. We can drive around for a while if you like.”  
“Oh yes, I'd love to!” Hiki really wanted to spend more alone time with him. “But we have to be back before 9. They will shut down the house, we wouldn’t get in anymore. Hajime told me earlier that there’s some trouble with a rival group, so they do that for precaution,” Hiki explained as they got into the car.  
Howl nodded, started the car and they started their cruise through the hills. Howl had turned on the seat heaters, so it was warm and cozy. They were holding hands, their fingers entwined. Hiki felt relieved and happy. “Oh, by the way… Th-Thank you for praising me so much in front of my father. That meant a lot to me,” he blushed.   
“Oh, so some of my words did reach you after all, I’m glad to hear that. I only stated the truth.”  
“I’m sorry, I was just… I don’t know, my thoughts were all over the place…”  
“I get it, Hikkun. It’s okay.” He sighed. “I don't know if it was a good idea to come here.”  
“I’m glad we came. I really missed Hacchan and Kaito. And normally my mother rarely leaves her room. She only joins dinner on special occasions. But if she does and I am there too, she can’t help but be reminded of the past, so she gets agitated and makes a scene. Even in front of my father’s business partners… so at one point, I was asked not to show up to big dinners anymore and I was glad, to be honest. She really hates my face… or more like what it reminds her of since I have the same attributes as Satoshi. It's worse when she drinks, though. And… around this time of year she’s a little more on the edge mentally anyway,” Hiki explained.   
“Why are you trying to justify her behavior after everything she said? Aren’t you angry?“  
“No, I’m not. Back then, right after my brother's death, when I felt lonely and lost and she told me that I should’ve been the one that died because that bullet was actually meant for me anyway… back then I was angry. But at myself. That was when I started blaming myself for what had happened. I believed her. I believed everything she said.”  
“Well, you were a traumatized kid, your brother got shot in front of you and died in your arms... Your mother should’ve been there for you. Heck, everyone should have been there for you! You needed help and comfort. That’s why I hate her even more and that’s why I’m not very fond of the rest of your family either, to put it mildly.”  
“Hacchan was always there for me though, even when I pushed him away in my self-hatred. And the others had to deal with their loss too. Hiroki was there when it happened, remember? It changed him. And our mother lost her son… imagine how she must’ve felt when Hiroki told her what had happened, and then she saw me at the hospital, covered in his blood… She’s never been mentally strong, but that broke her completely. I don’t want to justify her deeds nor what she said, but I can understand where it’s coming from. That’s why I’m not angry. Also, Satoshi’s day of death was three weeks ago. It’s taking a toll on all of us every year, but mostly on her, that’s why she’s drinking more than usual. I guess my family is pretty messed up, but I love them nonetheless.”  
“You’re too kind-hearted, Hikkun, you… Wait... Three weeks ago? Why didn’t you mention anything? I remember that you acted strangely for a few days. You were unusually reclusive and seemed absent-minded a lot. I wanted to ask you about it, but with the party planning and work I didn’t get the chance in the end.”  
“Ah, yeah that was the reason. I wasn’t aware that you’d noticed. Sorry that I didn’t talk about it. I wanted to, but I didn’t want to bother you because you were so busy... WAH!”  
Howl suddenly stepped on the breaks and the car promptly stopped with a loud screech.   
“What’s wrong? Was there a deer or something?”  
Howl put his hand on Hiki’s neck and pulled him closer.   
“Howl, wh-” He firmly kissed the surprised Hiki and bit his lip before they separated.   
“OW! Hey, what was that for?!”  
“Punishment. Because you wanted to talk about it, but you didn't.” He placed a soft kiss on his lips and his forehead. ”Next time talk to me if you want to talk. I’m your partner. I’m there to lift some weight off your shoulders, you don’t have to carry it all by yourself. Please try to remember that in the future.”  
Hiki nodded strongly. “Same goes for you, though.”  
Howl smiled, turned back to the steering wheel and sighed loudly. “As I said, it seems like sometimes my words just don’t reach you.   
“Please don’t scream again, I got you, I promise!” Hiki assured him. Howl chuckled, took Hiki’s hand and they continued driving.   
“This is a pretty rural area, huh,” Howl asked after a while.  
“Yeah, my father chose that house because he wanted something that was off the beaten track for safety reasons. I love this kind of environment. It's wholesome for both, body and mind. Remember when we came here and drove through Aoba Ward to avoid more traffic? That small village we passed was really cute. One day I’d like to live in a place like that,” Hiki confessed.   
“Is that so… Then let's buy a house there,” Howl suggested bluntly.  
“Yeah sure, why not. Let’s just buy a house.” Hiki scoffed. “You’re being silly again. But it’s a nice thought. We could retreat there on the weekends to relax from the stress during the week and escape the big city…”  
“What would you want our house to be like?”  
“A white, western style house, two stories, and a porch. Like those houses, you can see in Hollywood movies. And it should have a big entrance area with an open living room and a dining area. A place where you feel comfortable and at home as soon as you enter it. It should have a nice, modern kitchen so I can cook all your favorite meals for you. And we’d need guest rooms so Sophie, Hacchan, and Kaito could stay over from time to time.”  
“What about the garden? Do you want a pool?”  
“Of course! A pool, a jacuzzi and an area where I can grow vegetables and herbs. And the backyard needs to be big so we’d have a lot of space for our dog!”   
“A D-Dog?”  
“I’ve always wanted a dog, but my father is super allergic, so…”  
“A dog. Noted. Any specific breed, or...”  
“A Samoyed.”  
“Hikkun, that’s all really specific, did you come up with it just now?”  
“Well, when I was little and felt sad, I always imagined the life I’d want to live when I was an adult. I wanted to study hard, get a well-paid job and buy a house. But it’s all hypothetical and just a little boy’s dreams anyway.”  
Howl didn’t reply to that and they both went silent for a while, absorbed in their own thoughts.  
Around 8:30 they arrived at the house and parked the car.   
Hiki yawned. “Ugh, I’m so sleepy and it’s not even nine yet.”  
“Well, it’s been a long day and you haven’t slept much last night.”  
“You haven’t slept at all, right? You must be dead tired.”  
“I’m fine. Let’s go inside and head to bed.”   
Hiki leaned over and kissed Howl softly on the lips. “In a minute...”  
Howl cupped his face with his hand and kissed him back. He opened his mouth and his tongue slipped in, but then Hiki suddenly jolted away.   
“Oh, by the way,” he shouted. “I just remembered that you still didn't tell me what your oracle said!”   
“You want to know that now?!” Howl asked a little frustrated.   
“Mhm!” Hiki nodded excitedly.  
“Do you still have yours in your pocket?”   
“Me? Uh, yeah.” He rummaged around in his jeans pocket and pulled out the paper. “Here. It says ‘good luck’, see? There's great luck, good luck, just luck and then it goes over to bad luck and so on. I used to get bad luck or curse, this is the first time ever that I got good luck.”   
Howl took it and read part of it out loud. “Love… ‘Seems like your love life had been fatal so far, but it will change now for the better.’ Ouch…” Howl chuckled.   
“It's kinda true though,” Hiki giggled. “So what did you get?”   
“Mine said ‘good luck’ too.”   
“Really? So your love life was fatal too before you met me, huh? Hehe,” he teased him since they had drawn the same paper.  
“It’s much better now, that’s for sure,” he winked and made Hiki blush.  
“Well, looks like this year will be good for the both of us then.” Hiki rejoiced, not knowing that Howl had lied. The truth was that he had drawn a ‘greatest luck’ Oracle and for the category love it predicted ‘If you aren’t married, you are going to propose to a special someone or that someone will propose to you’. Howl smiled as he thought about it.   
“What is it?”   
“Nothing. I'm just happy to be with you, that's all.”  
“Me too,” Hiki sparkled.   
“I’m glad to see that you’re back to your old self. Are you feeling better?”  
“Yes, I feel a lot better thanks to you,” he smiled.   
“Same,” Howl replied, they got out of the car and headed into the house and went upstairs. Unexpectedly, Kitamura was standing in the hallway, waiting for them.   
“Hikaru-sama, your father wants to see you in his office.”  
“Huh? O-Okay. See you in a minute, Howl.”  
“No, you won’t. After that it’s curfew. He will go to his room now, you will go to yours after you talked to Ueda-sama.”  
“What?! Ugh, fine! Can we have a moment to say goodnight at least?!”  
“Hurry.”  
Hiki sighed, turned to Howl and looked at him with a sad face. “Good night, I’ll miss you.” He wanted to kiss him so bad, but with Kitamura watching, he didn’t dare to. But then Howl made a sudden movement into his direction and to Hiki's surprise, he placed a soft kiss on his lips.   
“Good night, Hikkun. I love you, and I’ll miss you too.”   
“I-I love you too,” the astonished Hiki replied.  
“Let’s go now, hurry,” Kitamura barked. Howl glared at him while he retreated to his room. Hiki followed his father’s subordinate to the office. He was very nervous, because his father rarely called him to his office, so it must’ve been something serious. He knocked.   
“Come in,” Yasuhiro answered.  
“Father, you wanted to see me?” Hiki walked inside.   
“Sit. I need to talk to you.”   
Hiki did as he was told and sat down on one of the black chairs in front of the big black desk. His father looked agitated and stressed, Hiki was so nervous that his palms were sweaty.  
“Listen, your mother called your uncle earlier. Until now I was able to keep her from doing so, but she was in a rage because of Howl’s behavior, so she told him everything about the two of you. He was furious, of course. He absolutely hates… that kind of lifestyle and he told me that you’re no longer welcome in his house or part of what he considers family.” Yasuhiro sighed and rubbed his forehead with his fingers. “Furthermore, he told me to separate you two, to force you to come back home and to beat you until you become ‘normal’ again. And that if I wouldn’t, he will the next time he sees you.”  
Hiki felt like his heart was about to stop. His uncle was a highly-esteemed member of Igarashi-kai, the clan he was a member of. He had a lot of influence, but he was violent and also frustrated and angry because he never made it all the way to his group’s top. This was bad, Hiki knew that. “I’m sorry for causing you so much trouble, father.” Hiki tried to stay calm. He knew that bursting out in emotions, begging his father to let him stay with Howl would be counterproductive because emotions were a weakness to him.  
“I told you things like this would happen if you’re together with a man. It’s not socially acceptable to be like that, especially not in our circles.” He sighed heavily. “But you’re very lucky that those aren’t my views. To make it short, I won’t force you to come back home or anything like that. You can go and live your life the way you want to, you’re no yakuza after all. You decided that you didn’t want to be a part of the family business and I respect that since you fought hard for it. Though it's also because your brother Hiroki is following my footsteps and will take over one day, so the future of the group is safe. But we’ll have to make sure that you won’t meet your uncle again. You’re lucky that Ueda-gumi is much larger and stronger than Igarashi-kai, so I won’t have to please him to prevent an uproar. He wouldn’t dare to start one.”  
“Thank you, father. I understand. I will stay here with Howl tomorrow and avoid uncle in the future.”   
“It’s unlikely that you’ll accidentally meet him in Tokyo, so it’s good that you moved there. But Hikaru, people like him will cross your path again in the future, I hope you’re prepared.”  
“I know that there are people who hate how we are. I have somewhat experienced it.” Hiki looked down at his arm that was still in the plastic cast from the incident at the ice rink. “But I can deal with it.” He raised his head, straightened his posture and smiled at his father confidently. “Our love is stronger than their hate.”  
“Maybe I still underestimate you. And Howl is a man full of pride who's able to protect you. I expected that from him, but tonight I got proof of it. Alright, you can leave now and go to bed. It was a long day for all of us,” Yasuhiro dismissed his son.  
“Thank you, father. Good night.” Hiki got up and left. He was overjoyed. His father had stated his support for him and Howl and they didn’t have to fight for their life together. Everything was going to be alright, he was more than relieved. Kitamura was already gone when Hiki stepped out of the office, but a guard had taken his place.   
“I have orders from Kitamura-san to bring you to your room, Hikaru-sama,” he informed Hiki.   
“Cut the sama, please. It’s okay, I can go there by myself.”  
“Orders,” he replied stubbornly.  
Hiki rolled his eyes and walked ahead, followed by his guard dog. “He approves of us and everything, but still treats me like a kid,” Hiki muttered. When they arrived at his room he turned around and thanked the guard before entering. _He’s only doing his job, after all_ , Hiki thought as he shut the door. He heard steps, so he was leaving and apparently walked back downstairs. Hiki sighed loudly. After changing into his pajamas he slumped down on his bed. _This is going to be a restless night_ , he thought. Suddenly his phone buzzed. It was a message from Howl.   
[Hikkun, I just heard steps. Was that you? Are you okay? What did your father want? Did he scold you because of me?]  
[Yeah it was me. I’m okay, I didn't get scolded, don't worry. But my mother told my uncle about us and he’s super homophobic. Long story short: I should stay away from him in the future.]  
[I’m gonna come over!]  
Hiki panicked. He didn’t want to cause any more trouble. Not to Howl, nor to his father in case the guard would catch them.  
[No, please! I’m fine, it’s no biggie, really!!]  
The seconds until Howl answered felt like years.  
[Alright. But don’t “no biggie” me, that doesn’t sound good. What exactly did he say?]  
[He just said that he doesn’t want me to come to his house ever again, so we’ll stay here tomorrow when everyone goes over for the new year's visit.]  
[I see.]   
Hiki played it down because he didn’t want to worry Howl.  
[By the way, how are you doing Howl? You must be exhausted. But our little drive was fun in the end ٩(｡•́‿•̀｡)۶ Sorry again for my little meltdown.]  
[Don’t apologize for your feelings. And yes, it was fun... Not so much for that tree, though.]  
[Oh yeah, that poor tree. (╯︵╰,) ]  
[Should I feel bad for beating it up?]   
[Definitely! We should go back tomorrow and apologize. (￢_￢;) ]  
[Too bad, because I was thinking that we could spend the day at the kotatsu since no one will be here… Just the two of us.]  
[Wah, really? Count me in! (๑˃ᴗ˂)ﻭ ]  
[But what about the tree?]  
[We can write a get well soon card. (^_~) ]  
[Isn’t it a bit morbid to write a card made of paper to a tree? Could've been one of its relatives…]  
[Ah, you’re right! We should send a condolence card as well then! (b ᵔ▽ᵔ)b ]  
Howl chuckled.  
[Great idea! Let’s write them at the kotatsu tomorrow. Good night Hikkun, sleep well. I love you.]   
[I love you too, Howl. So so much. Sleep well. ♡( ◡‿◡ )]  
They both smiled fondly and put their phones away.  
An hour and a half later Hiki was still awake. It was impossible for him to fall asleep. His body felt so restless, he was unable to relax. He sighed loudly when suddenly his phone buzzed again.  
[I can’t fall asleep, it’s impossible. This is bad. Really bad. I can’t sleep without you after all. I just can’t relax. I miss you.]  
Hiki stared at his phone for a moment, his heart was beating fast. He got up, walked over to the door and opened it slowly and carefully. It creaked a little, so he stopped. His heart was pounding. He squeezed himself through the small opening and slowly shut the door again. He tiptoed across the hallway over to Howl’s room. Suddenly the floor creaked and Hiki’s heart felt like it was about to jump out of his chest. He didn’t move for a good minute to see if the guard had heard him. But nothing happened, so he kept sneaking to Howl’s door. Right at the moment when he was about to open it, it got pulled open from the other side and with a sudden jerk on his arm he got dragged inside. He almost gasped loudly, but before he could do so, something covered his mouth. He realized that Howl was kissing him. They parted with a silent smack and Hiki looked into his lover’s smiling face.   
“Howl, what-”  
“Shhhh! I was about to sneak over to your room, but then I heard the floor squeaking. When the handle got pushed down I knew it was you. I’m happy that we both had the same idea, sorry if I startled you.” Howl explained whispering and Hiki smiled. “So you weren’t able to fall asleep either, Hikkun.”  
“No, I missed you too and I can’t sleep without you either. Look at us being so dysfunctional without one another,” he giggled.  
“It’s because we’re like gear wheels inside a watch. If one is missing, the other one doesn’t move, so the watch stops working.”  
“You’re so cheesy. Let’s go to sleep, you need to rest. I’ll put my phone’s alarm to 6 am. That should be early enough to sneak back.”  
“That’s good. Gives us some time for morning cuddles,” Howl grinned.   
They laid down on the bed, face to face, and Hiki snuggled against his lover’s firm chest.   
“The best feeling in the world.” He sighed and fell asleep instantly.   
“Indeed.” Howl smiled and drifted off too.


	13. Kotatsu encounters

 

 

 

 

“Hikkun…?... Hiiiiikkunnnnn~…... Hikaru!” Howl's silent but firm voice pulled Hiki from his dreams.   
“Mhh… what? Five more minutes please~...”  
“Hikkun, get up, we overslept!”  
“What?!” Instantly wide awake, Hiki jumped up from the bed, but still, in a daze, he tripped over the blanket and fell on the floor. “Ugh!”   
“Shhhhhh! Are you okay? Your alarm didn't work, it's already seven. You have to go back to your room before your guard comes to check up on you, hurry!” Howl whispered. “I can't believe that grown men have to do this," he added annoyed and got up to help up his lover.   
“I know, I'm sorry. I'll make up for it, promise.” Hiki kissed him, walked over to the door and before he opened it, he looked back at Howl and smiled. “I love you.”  
“I love you too. Now hurry. Be careful with the squeaking panel in the floor.”  
Hiki nodded, slowly opened the door and left to sneak over to his room. He maneuvered around the creaking panel and made it to his door without making a sound. He put his hand on the handle and started pushing it down slowly when he suddenly heard a deep voice behind him.   
“I knew you can’t be trusted. Disobeying your father, what a disgrace.”  
Hiki jolted and stopped breathing for a moment.   
“F-Father, I-I’m sorry, I wasn't…" He turned around. "Eh? Oniisan!?”  
“I knew you would mistake my voice for his, your reaction was priceless.” Hiki’s big brother Hiroki was standing right by the staircase at the other end of the hallway. “Don’t worry, the guard has already left. There was an incident and we need everyone who’s available. I just came back because I forgot something and I couldn’t resist watching you sneak around. It was too funny,” he grinned.  
“Y-You scared me. I almost had a heart attack,” the pale Hiki gasped.   
“You’re lucky that it was me who caught you. You know how much he hates it when we disobey his orders and he’s still very fond of corporal punishments. Be more careful next time.” Hiroki walked over to his room and opened the door. But before he walked in, he stopped for a moment and looked at Hiki. “About what our mother said… don’t take it to heart. You know how she gets when she had one too many. Especially around this time of year.”  
Hiki nodded and smiled. “I know. It’s okay, I have Howl by my side now. He’s a great support,” Hiki smiled.   
“That guy… does he treat you well?”  
“Y-Yes, he does! I’m very lucky to have him,” Hiki answered exuberantly.   
“Hmh. Isn’t it the other way around,” Hiroki mumbled as he walked into his room.  
“What did you say,” Hiki asked his brother, but he shut the door without giving him an answer. Hiki shrugged and went to his own room. He was very happy about the talk he just had with Hiroki.   
An hour later, Hiki, Howl, and Hajime met for breakfast in the dining room.   
“Good morning, Hacchan,” Hiki greeted his brother who was already sitting at the table.   
“Ah, good morning Niichan, good morning Howl. Did you sleep well,” he replied.   
“It was quite a restless night,” Howl answered.   
“It sure was… Until I snuck over to his room,” Hiki giggled.   
“Yeah, I figured that you would do that, hehe. It's so pointless not to allow you to sleep in the same room… But I think it's just a power thing anyway.” Hajime rolled his eyes. “By the way, are you okay Niichan? I mean because of what mother said. Her behavior hasn't been that bad in a while, but last night she really went all out on you.”  
“Yeah, I'm fine. Howl was a great support.” Hiki smiled at his lover.   
“Heck yes, Howl, you were awesome! I wish I could talk to her like that, but our father would kill me. He was surprisingly easy on you though, he must respect you a lot. I could've sworn that I even saw him smile! Thank you for standing up for my brother.”  
“No need to thank me, it's a normal thing to do for the person you love.”  
“That's true.” Hajime felt guilty.   
“Hacchan used to defend me all the time back then. Every time our mother had an outburst, he defended me, but it always just ended up with our father punishing him and I couldn't stand that. It hurt more than anything she said, so I begged him to stop doing it,” Hiki explained when he saw his brother's troubled expression.   
“You're a great brother, Hajime. Hikkun told me a lot about how you were always there for him in the past. You're definitely my favorite of the bunch. After Hikkun, of course.”   
Hajime smiled broadly. “Thank you, Howl-nii!”   
Hiki took Howl's hand underneath the table and pressed it gently as a subtle way to thank him for saying that.   
Shortly after they were done eating, Harumi and her family arrived. She didn’t even look at Hiki and Howl, but her husband Tadao greeted them friendly as he followed his wife to the other end of the table.  
When everyone, except for their mother who had been brought straight to the car by a maid, had gathered, they left and Howl and Hiki retreated to the lounge to get comfy under the kotatsu. They sat across from each other, enjoying the warmth of the heating table.  
“Haa… this is great! No one is at home except for the guards outside and we can relax a little,” Hiki sighed pleased.   
“All that’s missing right now are some snacks and tea. Should we get some,” Howl asked.  
“Jeez, we just ate an hour ago. Are you that stressed out?”   
“Hm? What makes you think that?”  
“Well, you tend to stress eat. Whenever you’re stressed out you snack all the time. And I know about your little candy and chips stash in your desk at the office…”  
“Th-That… I mean… Well… I can assure you that I’m not stressed right now. I just felt like having a little snack,” Howl answered flustered and blushed. Hiki’s heart throbbed as he saw his lover’s reaction.   
“Hmm… That’s really too bad… I was thinking of a way to relax you, but if you’re not stressed, there’s no point in that.” Hiki teasingly acted disappointed.   
“Wh-What were you thinking of, Hikkun?”   
Hiki glanced at him and grinned. Then, he lifted the blanket of the kotatsu and crawled underneath it.   
“Hikkun, what are you-” Howl suddenly felt something touching him between his legs and jolted.   
“Howl, stop that, you almost hit me in the face with your knee,” Hiki’s muffled voice sounded from his crotch.   
“Well, you startled me.”  
Hiki giggled. “May I continue?”  
“Are you sure? We’re in something like a public area… at your parents’ house…”  
Hiki opened Howl’s pants. “So? Nobody is here anyway. And this is kinda thrilling, isn’t it?” He gently pulled out Howl's dick and slid along Howl’s shaft with two fingers. Then he took it into his hand and slowly started caressing it.   
“Kh… Hikkun, this is… I can’t see what you’re doing, it’s like I’m blindfolded… Ngh!”  
Hiki began to tease Howl’s tip with his tongue and the unexpected sensation made him twitch. Hiki giggled pleased.   
“You’re really enjoying this, aren’t you?”  
Howl’s dick was now half erect. Hiki kept pumping with his hand and then decided to put it in his mouth.   
Howl flinched again. As Hiki was sucking him off enthusiastically, making more noises than usual to arouse his lover, even more, all of a sudden the door to the lounge opened. Howl’s heart stopped and he yelled: “U-Ueda-san!! What are you doing here?” Fortunately, Hiki reacted immediately and stopped moving.  
“Well, this is my house, Howl-san,” he answered, obviously displeased with Howl's reaction.   
“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to be rude, I was just surprised to see you. I thought you're at your brother-in-law’s house.” Howl would’ve sworn that he had never been so anxious in his life before. If they'd be caught by Hiki's father… He didn't even want to imagine the consequences of that. His fully erect cock was still deep inside Hiki’s mouth. Taking it out would've made suspicious noises. Howl was sending prayers to all the gods he knew that Yasuhiro would leave quickly.   
“Where’s Hikaru?”  
“He… He went to get snacks and tea,” was his brief reply.   
“I see. This is the first time we’re in a room together without my son. I would like to use the opportunity to talk to you about him and his current life a little.” Yasuhiro slowly walked over to the kotatsu, Hiki's heart was racing as he heard his father's steps getting closer. “I will join you for a minute to warm up a little, it's freezing outside.”  
Howl and Hiki both panicked.  
“Ah, Ueda-san, don't you have to leave? Isn't your family waiting?” Yasuhiro would've probably killed them, disowned Hiki and killed them again if he found out.   
“It's fine.” But the moment Yasuhiro bent over to sit down the door opened and someone rushed into the room.   
“Father, there you are. Are you ready? I got the papers and everything else. We should hurry and go back, they're waiting for us.” Hiroki had entered the scene and unknowingly saved them from exposure. Yasuhiro sighed as he got back up.   
“Too bad, Howl-san. I guess I have to leave now. We’ll talk another time. Please set an appointment with my secretary.” Yasuhiro turned around and left.   
Before Hiroki closed the door after them he paused, looked back and said: “Hey, blondie.”  
Howl glared at him. “What?”  
“Please continue to look after my little brother. Seems like you’re doing a good job so far.”  
“Of course I will...”   
“And tell Hikaru to turn down the heat of the Kotatsu.”  
“Huh?” Howl’s and Hiki’s hearts skipped a beat.  
“You don’t know how to do it, right? And your face is all flushed... Would be inconvenient if you’d faint from the heat, so tell him to turn down the heat when he comes back.”  
“Oh… yeah, I will,” Howl mumbled relieved.  
Hiroki nodded and left. Finally, Hiki was able to release Howl with a loud gasp.   
“Hikkun, are you okay? Howl lifted the blanket.   
“Nh, I'm fine, but my jaw is a little sore now,” he grinned.   
“Get out of there. Now,” Howl ordered him.   
“Ehh… But you’re still half hard…” Hiki pouted as he wiped the saliva from his chin and moved away from Howl's lap.   
“I'll go and take care of it in the bathroom,” he grumbled, closed his pants and got up. Hiki quickly crawled out from underneath the kotatsu and got up as well.   
“B-But Howl…”  
“As I said, I'll go and get rid of this. And you… go and get some snacks. A lot of them. Bring chocolate.” He sighed and left the lounge limping, leaving behind a worried Hiki. Howl seemed angry. Did he go too far?, he thought.   
“And by the way…” Howl appeared again and peeked inside the room. “We're going to continue where we left off as soon as we get back home, got it?” He pushed his glasses up with his index finger and shut the door.   
Hiki giggled relieved. “Yessir!”

When Howl came back, Hiki had set up the table neatly. There were tangerines, three bowls with different kinds of chips, mochi, dango and a plate with different variations of chocolates and cookies. He was already sitting there, waiting for his lover to arrive.   
“Welcome back,” he sparkled. “Come, sit. I brought everything I thought you’d like. And I made white jasmine tea, I hope that's okay. No shenanigans this time, promise,” he giggled. Howl smiled and sat down next to him. The huge flat screen TV was turned on and they enjoyed a movie while snacking and a while later they went to a restaurant for lunch.   
Hiki’s family stayed at his uncle’s house late, so the two of them were able to spend the whole day together without any disturbances. After dinner, Hiki had prepared some sandwiches for them, they had retreated to his room to get cozy and cuddle on Hiki's bed. A while later someone knocked on the door. But it wasn't just normal knocking, it was rhythmical, almost like morse code.   
“Yes it's okay to come in, Hacchan and we're fully dressed, jeez,” Hiki answered.   
“Hey you two, we’re back!” Hajime greeted them smiling as he opened the door.  
“Okay, what just happened,” Howl asked confused after they had sat up. Hiki giggled.   
“Remember how I told you that I was sick a lot when I was little and no one was allowed to come to my room and that I got so lonely that Hacchan saved up his pocket money to buy those walkie talkies so we could at least talk? Before he had done that, we often used morse code to communicate,” Hiki answered.   
“Yep. I found a book about it at the school library, so I learned how to use it and taught Niichan. There wasn't much I could do, but it was something."  
"That was… really smart of you, Hajime…"  
"Hey, why do you seem so surprised?" Hajime pouted. He walked over to his brother's bed and slumped down next to their feet.   
"Hacchan, say… was it bad," Hiki asked his brother worried.   
"Nh. Pretty bad to be honest. Uncle was super mad. He was raging and of course, our mother joined him in his rant, it was really annoying. They're so alike." Hajime rolled his eyes and sighed.   
"Thought so... I’m sorry for causing so much trouble for everyone. Father has to deal with a lot as it is and now he also has to deal with him. Good thing I moved to Tokyo, I should stay away for a while.” Hiki replied sad. Howl caressed his back to comfort him.   
“You should definitely stay away from Uncle. But he’s just a hot-headed idiot, everyone knows that especially our father, so don’t worry too much. He’ll calm down eventually. Anyway, it's really too bad that today was your last day here. We didn’t really get to spend much time together.” Hajime frowned. “And with Uni starting next week, we’ll be too busy to meet up again for a while.”   
“How about we go out for breakfast tomorrow,” Howl suggested. “We’ll have to leave around noon since I have to prepare some papers for work and such, but we can go out before. Invite Kaito too, my treat.”   
“Oh thanks, that’s a great idea! I’ll text Kaito,” Hajime rejoiced, jumped up and walked over to the door. “Good night, you two. And by the way, there was an incident with another clan so father and oniisan had to head over to the next town. They’ll stay overnight and they took some guards with them. There are only some outside to secure the house.” He winked, grinned and closed the door.   
Hiki looked up to Howl, sparkling. “No sneaking around tonight, yay!”  
“Your room or the guest room,” Howl asked smiling.   
“Hmm… the bed in the guest room is bigger, so let’s stay there.”  
"Not that we need much space, though. I'll be all over you tonight," Howl grinned.   
"No way! We can't do that here!"   
"Oh, so _now_ you mind doing pervy things here," Howl teased his lover.   
"Th-That's… Well… everyone will be at home tonight, so that's different and therefore a definite no."  
“Not even a little touching?”  
“No,” Hiki replied stubbornly.   
“Seriously Hikkun, you’re killing me.”  
Hiki turned to Howl and kissed him. “When we’re back home I’ll let you do whatever you want with me, okay?”  
“Deal!!”   
Hiki giggled and they got up to get ready for bed. Since Howl preferred to shower in the morning, he was done quickly and already in bed when Hiki joined him.   
“Work?” Hiki asked Howl while rubbing his hair with a towel as he walked over to the bed and sat down. Howl put away his phone after he had finished typing, sat up and took the towel from Hiki to continue drying his hair for him. He gently massaged his lover’s head with his fingers.   
“No, that was Kinsley. He told me that his eldest daughter got engaged tonight.”  
“Oh really? That’s great! I hope Marie will be happy forever,” he smiled. “I love weddings. They’re so romantic… Although, the only one I’ve ever been to was Harumi’s. She was a beautiful bride.”  
“Is that so… Well, I think your hair has dried enough. Want to spoon? Come here…” Howl lifted the blanket, Hiki slipped underneath it, snuggled his back against him and Howl wrapped his arms around him.   
“Hmm… you smell so good,” Howl noticed.   
Hiki yawned. “Oh sorry, hehe. But it’s so warm and cozy, it makes me realize how tired I am. This is better than any kotatsu.”  
“True. But still, we should get our own.”  
“Really? That would be great, but… don’t you think it would clash with the style of the furniture in the living room?”  
“Well, the way you're using it, we should probably put it in the bedroom anyw- ouch! Hey, don't pinch me,” Howl chuckled.   
“Idiot.” Hiki blushed.   
They went silent, but after a while, the already half asleep Hiki asked: “Howl… what do you want to do on your birthday next week?”   
“Hmm… I'll have work and Uni starts on Monday, so just dinner somewhere is fine.”  
“Eh~... But that's nothing special, we go out for dinner all the time,” Hiki mumbled.  
“Everything is special when I’m with you.”  
“So cheesy. No, it needs to be something really special.”   
Howl took a moment to answer, so Hiki thought he'd fallen asleep. He closed his eyes too and started drifting off when Howl suddenly whispered: “How about dinner and afterwards you strip for me like in one of those movies. With music and everything,” Howl suddenly whispered. Hiki opened his eyes wide in shock. Did he hear that right? Did Howl just seriously tell him to strip? Or was that just sleep talking? Hiki didn't answer. His mind was overflowing with thoughts. Would he be able to do that? How even? He had obviously never done that. He hadn’t even danced before. Although he was able to play the piano, he wasn’t very rhythmical in general. His heart was beating fast. He would make a fool out of himself if he tried, he was sure. Would Howl even laugh at him? Some time passed, but he wasn’t able to fall asleep. Howl’s breathing had been even now, so he was fast asleep. Hiki slowly crawled out of the bed, careful not to disturb his lover, and sat down on the floor in front of it. He took his Phone from the nightstand and turned it on. He tapped on the web browser icon and typed “Striptease beginners guide” into the search bar. The first page that was suggested was titled “Striptease for dummies”. Hiki sighed, clicked it and started reading.

Suddenly the alarm on his phone went off. He hadn’t noticed how much time had passed while he was doing his research, but it had already become morning. He hadn’t slept for a single minute.   
“Mhh… Hikkun?” Howl mumbled sleepily as he reached out and searched for Hiki with his hand on his side of the bed.   
“Ah, yeah, I’m here!”  
“Why are you sitting on the floor? Get up, you’re gonna catch a cold!”  
If Howl knew that he had sat there for hours, he would’ve become mad, Hiki thought.   
“Did you sleep well,” he asked as he got up and sat down on the bed next to his sleepy lover.   
“Not really. I don’t feel as refreshed as I usually do.”  
“It’s probably the bed. But tonight we’re gonna sleep in our own bed again.” Hiki leaned over and kissed Howl.   
“I can’t wait, but sleeping isn’t exactly what I’m planning to do there,” he replied after they parted and grinned.  
“Pervert,” Hiki whispered, kissed him again and got up. “Ugh, so stubbly. Come on, let’s get ready and leave for breakfast, I’m starving.”

About an hour later they left to have breakfast at an all you can eat restaurant downtown that Hajime had suggested. Hiki chose his favorite foods like Miso soup, grilled salmon and avocado. Howl stuck with coffee, eggs and bacon. But after Hiki scolded him for his unhealthy food choice, he added some vegetables to his plate. Hiki smiled approvingly.   
“You two are kinda gross, you know that,” Hajime remarked as they sat down in one of the booths.   
“Eh? What do you mean,” Hiki asked.   
“Take it as a compliment. You’re clearly made for each other.”  
Hiki and Howl glanced at each other, Hiki blushed.   
“See, that was super gross.”  
“Hacchan, stop saying that,” Hiki scolded his younger brother.  
“But I mean it in a good way!” He giggled.  
“Don’t listen to him, he’s just jealous,” Kaito intervened.   
“Of course I am. Who wouldn’t want that?” He pointed at Hiki and Howl. “But that doesn’t mean I’m not happy for you. You deserve all the happiness in the world, Niichan. And Howl can obviously give it to you. I’m glad you found each other.” Hajime smiled lovingly at his brother.   
“Hacchan…” Hiki was moved by his brother’s words.  
“So, when’s the wedding,” he added teasingly.  
“Hacch-” Hiki wanted to rail at him, but Howl interrupted him.   
“That’s ridiculous, Hajime. We’re in Japan, we can’t get married.”  
“Well, you could adopt Hiki,” Kaito mentioned.  
“Come on, you really think their father would allow that?”  
“True. Our father would never give his consent,” Hajime agreed. “Imagine the uproar that would cause…”  
Hiki’s heart throbbed, Howl’s words sounded very harsh. Hiki had never thought about things like that, so why did realizing it wouldn’t be possible hurt?   
After breakfast, they went back to the house to grab their luggage. Kaito and Hajime waited at the car to see them off.   
“We’ll miss you guys,” Hajime said and hugged his brother after they had loaded the car. “Call me, Niichan, okay?”  
Hiki nodded. “I will. I’ll call you too, Kaito,” Hiki addressed his childhood friend and hugged him as well before they got into the car. They fastened their seatbelts, Howl started the car and took Hiki’s hand. “Ready to go home, Hikkun?”  
Hiki nodded smiling. “Let’s go back home.”


End file.
